Cele|bitchy |
- January Jones’ baby-daddy possibilities: Adrien Brody, Jeremy Piven or Becks?!
- Jennifer Aniston in a red, cleavage-y Vivienne Westwood: fabulous or meh?
- Alicia Keys on loving Swizz Beatz: “I feel so open now, everything is going to be fine”
- Reese Witherspoon’s big Southern hair and green dress: cute or tragic?
- Linnocent covers Blank Mag, allegedly offers sex as a form of payment
- Angelina Jolie’s bisexual, dominatrix sex life is much better than yours
- Jessica Biel cuts off contact with Justin Timberlake, tries to woo Bradley Cooper
- Cameron Diaz takes on pregnancy in ‘What To Expect When You’re Expecting’
- Teen Mom ‘I wish I just cuddled’ PSA: realistic or ridiculous?
- Angelina Jolie & Jack Black talk adoption, kids & ‘Kung Fu Panda 2′
| January Jones’ baby-daddy possibilities: Adrien Brody, Jeremy Piven or Becks?! Posted: 06 May 2011 08:40 AM PDT I get that not everybody is as obsessed with figuring out January Jones' baby-daddy secrets of doom, but I AM. I think this whole situation is rather fascinating, because I've long held a pretty low opinion of January as a person, and this "choice" that she's making to withhold the name of the baby-daddy and become a single mother… well, it just feels like there's something more to it. Something dirtier. Definitely something dirtier than just the easy explanation of her ex, Jason Sudeikis. What surprises me is that the tabloids aren't all over it - she's a pretty actress, a red carpet Fashion Girl, in a hit TV show and she's making her way into more and more films. Why are the tabloids not all over this? Some restrained sense of decency? Yeah, right. It's more likely that they're not all over this because no one is talking. January has this secret locked down! Which makes me respect her a little bit. Anyway, here's one of the few stories I could find in this week's tabloids:
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] Hm… Jason, Jeremy "Jailbait" Piven, Adrien "Douchestache" Brody, or Mystery Producer? What about Bobby Flay? What about her dear friend Jack Nicholson? What about some random married dude? The possibilities are endless! In my mind. By the way, January recently went to a Lakers game (where JACK NICHOLSON regularly appears!), and photographers got some photos of January chatting with David Beckham. So, obviously, Becks in the baby-daddy mix too. Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN. |
| Jennifer Aniston in a red, cleavage-y Vivienne Westwood: fabulous or meh? Posted: 06 May 2011 08:23 AM PDT Here are some new photos of Jennifer Aniston outside of Sephora in NYC yesterday afternoon. At first I thought the Vivienne Westwood dress was orange, but it's more of an orange-pink-red, right? And there are peekaboo boobs! And a wonky hemline. But still, it's nice to see her in a bright color, and she should work these kinds of colors more often - they suit her so much more than the neutrals and black stuff she usually wears. Also, while she's finally changed up her hair, it's still in her face, isn't it? Ugh. I won't nit-pick, sorry. It's a good look for her, overall. Aniston was all dressed up for Sephora because she's finally (?) launching her fragrance "Jennifer Aniston" stateside. Celebuzz is still calling it "Lola V" while WENN calls it "Aniston" so who knows? You too can smell like you've just been Butler'd: boned, then left on a beach naked and hungover, with a great pedicure. You too can smell like "Aniston: The Perfume". In other Aniston news, I got a chance to read the full Star Magazine cover story this week, the one where her brief 2008 lover Brian Buomo tells Star all about Jennifer's hopes, dreams aspirations and her future. Now that I've read the whole thing… it's really sketchy. I don't know any straight man who speaks of his heterosexual ex-lover the way Brian talks about Aniston. Brian and Aniston only dated for, like, a month, and the way he talks about her… well, I'm a conspiracy theorist, you know. Here are a few "WTF?" lines from the interview:
[From Star Magazine, print edition] He sounds like… Aniston. This is exactly how she sounds. This is the kind of phrasing she uses. "I just let my guard down and was open to letting her in." Ugh, it’s like boning a self-help book. Now, let me put my conspiracy hat on. Some theories: *Aniston or someone in her PR team wrote this junk for Brian, and he just said to make a quick buck from Star, and from Aniston. *He's totes gay, and HE is the one who is truly fabulous, and he was just helping a sister out. FABULOUS!!! *He's straight, and his relationship with Aniston consisted of reading self-help books together and building up each other's self-esteem (Brian: "You're so pretty!" Aniston: "You deserve love, you are amazing!"). This 2008 relationship was the last time Brian ever had that kind of happiness. *It's all some kind of drunken scheme by Aniston and/or Chelsea Handler…? It probably made more sense in Cabo, when they were doing shooters with the cabana boys. |
| Alicia Keys on loving Swizz Beatz: “I feel so open now, everything is going to be fine” Posted: 06 May 2011 08:13 AM PDT
[Essence via Bossip] I really love what she said about dedicating that song to her mother. It’s a nice message ahead of Mother’s Day - which reminds me that I have some gift shopping to do before Sunday! That said, Alicia has told both Swizz’s ex wife’s son and his daughter with that singer to call her “umi,” which means mom in Arabic. (This is according to Swizz’s ex wife.) So I don’t have much regard for Alicia. She’s pretty much pulling a LeAnn Rimes without tweeting about it incessantly. Now Alicia has let her guard down with a guy who cheats and gets other women pregnant regularly. It’s just a matter of time before it happens to her, because men like that do not change. Alicia is shown on 5/2 and 5/3/11. Credit: WENN.com |
| Reese Witherspoon’s big Southern hair and green dress: cute or tragic? Posted: 06 May 2011 08:12 AM PDT Here are some new photos of Sparkles & Reese Witherspoon doing the Water for Elephants promo stuff in Sydney, Australia today… or yesterday? Or tomorrow. I can't tell, honestly. Who knows. As for the photos from the premiere - how much do you love Reese's HUGE Southern hair? The bigger the hair, the closer to God. The dress looks super-Southern to me too, what with the exaggerated sweetheart neckline - allegedly, the dress is Zac Posen…? Maybe, maybe not. As for Sparkles, he looked tired but nice. For the photo call, he and Reese actually had to interact with an elephant, and I think the ellie took a whiz on Sparkles, so… yeah. He has a reason to look slightly unkempt. But still… he's kind of prettier than Reese, right? Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News. |
| Linnocent covers Blank Mag, allegedly offers sex as a form of payment Posted: 06 May 2011 08:00 AM PDT Here are some of the shots from Linnocent's newest magazine pictorial, for Blank Magazine (shots courtesy of The Mail). There's quite a bit of Photoshopping, of course, but it just kills me that even after all of the crack shenanigans, all of the drinking, and coking, and crack thievery and jail and rehab, it kills me that Linnocent is still so photogenic in formal photography. In candids, you can see her drastic aging and her lifestyle all over her bloated crack face, but in portrait and fashion photography, with good lighting and hair and makeup, the crackhead still looks good. Ugh. In other Linnocent news, the last I head was that she would likely get to serve her 120-day jail sentence in some kind of electric-monitored house arrest situation. It is unknown if the electronic monitor will just be for "location" or if it would also monitor Linnocent's drug and alcohol usage. Speaking of Linnocent still being a raging alcohol who pours vodka into her Red Bull, Star Magazine has another interview with Keith Middlebrook, the producer dude who claimed that he briefly paid Linnocent's hotel and liquor bills:
[From Star Magazine, print edition] So, Linnocent is drunken liar who offers sex as a way of "payment". And I'm assuming she offers sex FOR payment as well. So… are there really people out there who think that Linnocent is anything more than a drunken, coked-out hooker who will do anything and anyone to stay out of jail and to stay drunk and coked-out? Photos from Blank Magazine, courtesy of The Mail. |
| Angelina Jolie’s bisexual, dominatrix sex life is much better than yours Posted: 06 May 2011 07:50 AM PDT I already covered the first excerpts from this week's hilarious In Touch Weekly, all about how Angelina Jolie is still bisexual, to the point where she just loves to randomly hook up with ladies in hotel rooms, and flirt with girl waitresses, and stewardesses, and how Brad can only weep, knowing that he can never satisfy The Jolie (because he lacks biscuits). Anyway, I've had the chance to read the whole thing, and it's EPIC. You know how In Touch absolutely hates Angelina, right? And you know how they can turn the most innocent little thing into some kind of crazy hate-fest? Well, they did it again, and this time they seem to be bashing Angelina because, in the local parlance, Angelina likes to "get hers". Basically, she has orgasms, and she encourages Brad to give her as many as she can. DEVIL WOMAN!!! SHUN!!! But that's not all, of course. That's just the subtext. The text is all about Angelina's insatiable sexual needs, and how she makes Brad feel like he's not "man enough" to satisfy her. I'll be honest, this story turned me on a little:
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] *fans self* Okay, what else? Oh, she takes Brad to lingerie shops and makes him choose her panties. And of course, there's an excess of stuff about "poor Brad" and how Angelina would never let HIM sleep with other women, so why does SHE get to? Um, because it's HOT. But my absolute FAVORITE part of the story is the photo spread - In Touch compiled all of these photos of Angelina standing next to or hugging various women on, you know, like red carpets and stuff, and In Touch insinuates that Angelina is boning all of them. There's a photo of Angelina with Holly Goline, her assistant of 12 years, and ITW claims that Holly will "sleep over" in Angelina's bed when Brad's away. There's a photo of Angelina kissing: a female fan on a red carpet, La Femme Nikita star Peta Wilson, and my two favorites: Queen Rania of Jordan (Angelina is kissing Rania's cheek, btw, but it certainly looks suggestive), and finally, a photo of Angelina kissing Clint Eastwood's wife Dina. OH NOES. Angelina is going to homewreck Clint Eastwood! (to get to his wife!) Is anyone else hot? I'm hot. Photos courtesy of WENN, InTouch and promotional shots from 'Mr. and Mrs. Smith'. |
| Jessica Biel cuts off contact with Justin Timberlake, tries to woo Bradley Cooper Posted: 06 May 2011 07:40 AM PDT In Touch Weekly has an odd story this week about how Jessica Biel has finally found a spine and she's finally cut off contact with Justin Timberlake. Apparently, after Justin and Jessica broke up, Justin still wanted to maintain a friendly relationship, but Biel wasn't having it:
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] If this is true, it's my hope that Biel cut him off because Justin is a douchey cheater and she's finally found the strength to move on from a relationship in which she came out looking kind of clingy, needy and pathetic for putting up with his stupidity for so long. I might also buy that Justin is the kind of guy who likes to keep exes around, just for freebie ex sex. Gross. Meanwhile, this week's National Enquirer has Jessica Biel trying to rub on Bradley Cooper, a hookup that I fully endorse. Bradley and Biel are kind of perfect for each other, romantically (if you buy that) or beard-wise (if you buy that). The Enquirer claims that Biel has "had a crush" on Bradley since they worked together on The A-Team, and that she recently invited Bradley to go on a hike with her, and Bradley agreed to go "when they can work out a time." Which makes it sound like he's not all over it. This might also perturb Jennifer Aniston, who is reportedly trying to get some B. Coop action as well, and The Enquirer's source claims "Bradley loves that two of the hottest actresses in Hollywood are playing tug-of-war over him." Gross. |
| Cameron Diaz takes on pregnancy in ‘What To Expect When You’re Expecting’ Posted: 06 May 2011 07:38 AM PDT Millions of women, including myself, have endured pregancy with the indispensible help of a little book called What to Expect When You’re Expecting. In fact, I’d suspect that purhasing this book (or borrowing it from a friend) is one of the first things that pregnant women do after freaking out over a positive pregnancy test. The bestseller is a very matter-of-fact guide to what’s going on at all stages of gestation and even includes some rather icky post-natal discussions; it does not mince words, and it is not a lovey-dovey, narrative-styled piece of literature. Naturally, Hollywood wants to ruin the book by lifting the title (for name recognition purposes) and adapting it into a form of romantic comedy starring none other than Cameron Diaz. This piece of news comes from Deadline’s Mike Fleming, whose sources are usually right on the money:
[From Deadline] What’s even worse than the retooling of the book’s subject matter into a nonrecognizable, episodic, mushy series of pre-birth marriage proposals and (inevitably) someone giving birth in the back seat of a cab is the fact that we’re going to have to watch Cameron Diaz freak out when her water breaks. The notion of Diaz giving a believable performance as a pregnant woman is completely laughable, which is partially her fault by giving all of those “soundbite”-styled interviews about how she loves her life more than the idea of having children and thinks marriage a dying institution. While Diaz will be acting like a pregnant woman in this movie, will it seem even remotely authentic to the target audience, who presumably enjoys the thought of having children and also feels a lot differently about marriage than Cameron seems to do? And don’t even get me started on how annoying her screams will sound in a birth scene.
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| Teen Mom ‘I wish I just cuddled’ PSA: realistic or ridiculous? Posted: 06 May 2011 07:09 AM PDT
Wednesday was “National Day To Prevent Teen Pregnancy,” and as part of awareness efforts the stars of Teen Mom 2 recorded some PSAs promoting less sex and safe sex. When I first saw this news on Radar, I thought it was all about abstinence, but I should have known better because the show does talk about using protection, and so do the PSAs. There are four different PSAs. In the one above the girls say they wish they’d cuddled the night they got pregnant (I guess that’s like saying they wish they waited), they also talk about the importance of protection, of waiting to have children, and the things they missed out on by having a child so early. The first PSA is above and you can see the rest on MTV.com. They’re promoting it’syoursexlife.com. According to Radar, Teen Mom 3 comes out in June and it features these same mothers we’ve come to know from Teen Mom 1 and 2: Maci, Amber, Catelynn and Farrah. I thought that the new Teen Mom would get updated with the mothers from the latest 16 and Pregnant, but now I remember seeing photos of filming at Amber’s house around Christmastime, so I guess that makes sense. Speaking of abusive neglectful mom Amber, she recently bitched to MTV about how hard life is for her and how the show doesn’t glamorize teen pregnancy and living “paycheck to paycheck.”
[From MTV] I get that most teens do barely scrape by and live paycheck to paycheck when they have a baby out of highschool, and that’s what Amber means here. Still, she makes $280,000 a year from MTV but she’s making it sound like she’s broke. This show is the best thing that ever happened to her and in that way it’s glamorous. Both Farrah and Maci got boob jobs and several of them have been on the cover of tabloids. What “message” is Amber getting out? That she’s being rewarded for being an entitled, abusive piece of work who is in no way capable of raising the child she brought into the world? Maybe by showing her incompetence and poor anger management issues she’s a message out, but I doubt it’s reaching other teens like her. Here are the Teen Mom stars on 4/11/11. It looks like Amber’s mom is taking care of her daughter for her anyway. Credit: Fame. |
| Angelina Jolie & Jack Black talk adoption, kids & ‘Kung Fu Panda 2′ Posted: 06 May 2011 06:49 AM PDT USA Today has a great interview with Angelina Jolie and Jack Black, who are promoting their work in Kung Fu Panda 2. Since I don't have kids, I can't speak with any real knowledge about how much or how little kids liked the first Kung Fu Panda movie, but I've seen parts of it on television, and it looked pretty cute. Jack Black's voice work is stellar, and it's hilarious to me that Dustin Hoffman was playing "The Master" or whatever. Anyway, Angelina and Jack have an easy chemistry together, and it's a great read. You can read the whole thing here, at USA Today, and here are some highlights:
[From USA Today] Angelina also tells USA Today that Empress Zahara "loves tigers" so Z is the one most into Jolie's voice work as Tigress. I think the other kids like Po more - obviously, because Po is much cooler and funnier. There's also a lot of stuff about how the first KFP was a HUGE international hit, and how they're trying to do something different with the story this time. I'm sure it will work out - these animated films usually do, especially when there's a built-in audience of kids who watch the first DVD obsessively. Photos from the Cannes Film Festival in 2008, courtesy of WENN. |
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