Monday, January 3, 2011

Best Week Ever

Best Week Ever

Pug And Ball Join Forces To Make Succinct Web Video

Posted: 03 Jan 2011 09:24 AM PST

“Hey, man, you NEED to watch this video. I mean, it’s kind of long, but you have to watch the whole thing… I promise it’s worth it.” – The Last Thing Anyone Ever Wants To Hear

Good news! This video is not like that at all. It is so short. If your friend sent this to you, you would admire his or her restraint.

Thanks, Buzzfeed.

South Korea Welcomes The New Year With An Underwater SCUBA Rabbit

Posted: 03 Jan 2011 03:29 AM PST

In honor of the new year in South Korea, here’s a dude in a SCUBA rabbit suit doing underwater acrobatics in the middle of a bunch of fish. As I suspected, this is indeed the Korean equivalent of a NKOTB / Backstreet Boys Supergroup:

2011 is officially the Year of the Rabbit in Korea, so, you know, flipping SCUBA bunny. Though it’s certainly no Avril Lavigne singing “Girlfriend” for a bunch of Times Square-ites delirious with bathroom-holding-in, at least in terms of me not precisely knowing why I’m seeing it.

Justin Bieber And Selena Gomez On Vacation: Closest Thing To Child Porn Legally Viewable On The Internet

Posted: 03 Jan 2011 09:24 AM PST

If you’ve seen any movie or TV show about teens, you’ve seen them make out and it’s not weird. But, somehow, this is weird. Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber were on a yacht over the New Years weekend, and because we won our independence from the British and then our grandfathers fought in WWII, we have the freedom to send grown men to take pictures of children getting to first base.

Selena Gomez is actually 18, so she is technically not a child, but if they only thing keeping you from being creepy for looking at something is a technicality, you’re still creepy. You’re all disgusting. Go tell your bosses you’re fired.

New Years Resolution for 2011: Get everyone to not take pictures of children that should get us all kicked off the internet and fired.

These Hawaiian Drag Grandmas Will Sell You Taxis

Posted: 03 Jan 2011 02:25 AM PST

Here’s a commercial currently running on local Hawaiian television for a cab company, featuring a bunch of dudes in tropical grandma drag dancing to a ukulele trio. It is remarkably similar to the visions I experienced the time I was trying to write a Hawaiian-themed Fear And Loathing sequel and asphyxiated myself while spooning a Percocet-coated pineapple:

The term “tutu” means “grandma” (or any old lady) in Hawaii, and the cab company’s phone number involves a bunch of twos, so that’s the (disappointingly almost-sane) explanation. But I’ll stick with my initial explanation, “Zer?”

LeBron James’ Birthday Cake Is The King Of Birthday Cakes

Posted: 03 Jan 2011 02:43 AM PST

You’ve heard of the Cake Boss, but have you heard of the CAKE KING??? You shouldn’t have, because it’s not a television show or expression. But here’s LeBron James’ birthday cake, which has a crown on it and is ridiculous:

As awesomely extravagant as that is, two immediate questions come to mind:

1) How do you cut this, and why would you ever?

2) Uh, the wall?

The only way to improve this photo (and LeBron’s ongoing Kanye-esque spike of absurdity) would be if it turns out to just be a pawn in some massive, luxurious chessboard that LeBron is designing. Actually I’m gonna go ahead and break the story that that’s exactly what this is. Heard it here first, universe.

(via @FreeDarko)
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