Cele|bitchy

“Oprah is your new Jesus, worship her” links
Sean Penn: insufferable jagoff or misunderstood, emo man-child?
Kate Gosselin’s bodyguard supposedly took those bikini pics of her
Holly Madison and Kendra Wilkinson respond to the news of Hef’s engagement
Gwyneth Paltrow isn’t faring too well in ‘Country Strong’ reviews

“Oprah is your new Jesus, worship her” links

Posted: 07 Jan 2011 11:38 AM PST

Oprah thinks she's the second coming of Jesus. [Dlisted]
The Hamm is always #1. ALWAYS. *drool* [LaineyGossip]
Another year, another Goop newsletter about her constipation. [Agent Bedhead]
Natalie Portman half-naked in No Strings Attached. [Egotastic]
Sandra Bullock & baby Louis in NYC. [Pop Sugar]
Lauren Conrad as a brunette - cute or meh? [Celebuzz]
Courtney Love got sued for her Twitter account. [PopBytes]
The 10 Best Populist Movies of 2010. [Pajiba]
Ben Affleck just seems like such a jackass in these photos. [Evil Beet]
Ryan Gosling is lovely and charming on Ellen. [ONTD]
Mariah Carey baby bump! Those twins are big. [Radar]
Katface Kardashian and Kris Humphries are still boning. [PopEater]
I see photos of Minka Kelly and think "Leighton Meester!" [IDLITW]
New couple: Chloe Sevigne & Pauly D. For reals! [The Blemish]
Paula Abdul better save that pill money. [Crazy Days and Nights]
Miranda Kerr gave birth to a boy! Allegedly. [ICYDK]
Brad Pitt playing John Lennon? Yeah. Doubtful. [Seriously? OMG! WTF?]

Sean Penn: insufferable jagoff or misunderstood, emo man-child?

Posted: 07 Jan 2011 11:00 AM PST

This interview is from a few days ago, but it's worth covering. Sean Penn gave an extensive interview to The Hollywood Reporter, likely to draw more attention to his continued work in Haiti. As I've said before, I admire Sean's work in Haiti - I think his heart is in the right place, and he is making a difference. But, as I've also said before, Sean ruins whatever respect or warmth you might have for him by being such an insufferable jag. In the piece (done over the holidays in Haiti, which is where Sean spent his Christmas), Sean ends up saying a lot of crap about Robin Wright and their divorce. The full THR piece is here, and here are the highlights:

Sean on the chaos of his life: "There's a great thing Paul Newman said about his long marriage," he says wryly. " 'As it turns out, we still love each other.' That's how I feel: 'As it turns out, I'm still here.' "

Sean Penn on the United Nations (versus his own Haitian-based charity, J/P Haitian Relief Organization): Penn sniffs at "the amount we're getting done, versus what they're doing — which is nothing. Quite honestly, if you want something done, do it yourself."

Sean on his divorce, and money: "I didn't have commitments, except for way in the future; I had nothing pressing," as if this will make everything clear. But he admits, "I got practical issues, like everybody. I had two federal cases against me at the time, and one criminal one," he says, referring to charges for illegal trips to Cuba and assaulting a paparazzo. Also, he says, about his former wife Robin Wright, "I had just got taken for one half of everything I had in the divorce, so it's not like I don't have to work."

Also: He says the divorce impacted him much more than his move to Haiti. "A much more profound change in life for me personally was not being able to raise my son in a whole family through high school," he professes bitterly.

Sean on his alienation: He speaks of a future when he might leave the camp in others' hands, then wavers. On some level, he belongs here. "Let's face it," he admits, as the daylight begins to fade, "I'm a person that feels pretty alienated from the rest of the world and never felt understood by anyone."

He's moved to Haiti now: "There's no end point," he says, drained to the point of collapsing. "This is where I'll be when I'm not working, for the rest of my life."

[From The Hollywood Reporter]

In a previous interview, Sean described his involvement in Haiti as some kind of agreement with God - that when his son was hospitalized, Sean prayed and pledged to be more involved in the world if Hopper was spared. What kills me, though, is that since his involvements in Haiti have grown, he barely sees his kids. I seriously doubt it's a matter of "Robin won't let Sean see the kids" either - it seems like he just found a project, and he's ignoring everything else, including being a parent.

Also - "I'm a person that feels pretty alienated from the rest of the world and never felt understood by anyone." Sean is so emo. That must explain the Robert Smith hair.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Kate Gosselin’s bodyguard supposedly took those bikini pics of her

Posted: 07 Jan 2011 10:57 AM PST

So much for my theory that Kate Gosselin’s bodyguard boyfriend ditched her. There may be a very good reason why we didn’t see Kate’s not-so-undercover lover in the most recent set of photos of her on vacation in Australia - he was taking the pictures. Hollybaby points out that Steve was sitting on a balcony overlooking Kate when she was sunbathing and showing off her spraytan abs. (You can see those photos at Hollywood Tuna and Hollybaby has more.) Hollybaby posits the theory that it was none other than Steve who took the photos of Kate sucking in her gut and sold them to the photo agencies.

Uh-oh! Has Kate Gosselin's bodyguard and rumored lover Steve Nield overstepped the boundaries of his position? It's his job to protect Kate and her eight kids against intruders, including paparazzi, but could he actually be the one who took the photos of Kate in a bikini in Australia and sold them to photo agencies? And did he do it with Kate's approval?

Just looking at the railing in these photos, and you can see that the pics were taken from the same balcony that Steve was sitting on. Either he is a lousy bodyguard who can't chase a way a paparazzo, or he is the one who took the photos! And does it seem weird that Kate was sucking in her stomach while she lay out in her bikini — maybe she knew she was being photographed!

According to a fan site, the resort that Kate and her kids stayed at has very expensive rates and a pretty exclusive list. "There's no way REAL paps would ever be able to afford it," The Grapevine notes. Rooms at the Mooloolaba Beach Resort (located about an hour away from Brisbane) start at $550 a night for a two-bedroom suite during off-season, but it's the middle of summer in Australia now, so it's even more pricey, and weekend rates reach as high as $2,200 a night!

"I bet all along Steve has been taking photos of Kate with her permission and selling the photos and splitting the proceeds with Kate," a reader of The Grapevine shares.

Wow, doesn't this whole scenario seem a bit off? And it appears that guests at the resort were not happy with Kate and her crew being there. "Thanks to an Aussie who's family stayed at the resort at the same time, we learned that Kate acted like a total bitch/diva," the site claims. "The kids are cute, and the TLC crew wrecked havoc on the property traipsing about, filming, without a care for the experience of the other guests!"

[From Hollybaby]

We saw firsthand what a diva Kate Gosselin was when she was in Alaska visiting Sarah Palin and knew she was being filmed. I’m sure this story about her acting like a mean bitch is true.

But here’s a potential wrench in that theory - Hollybaby also has a photo of Steve sitting on the balcony overlooking Kate. So who took that picture? If Steve was taking the photos, you’d think there wouldn’t be any pictures of him at all. Maybe someone threw that photo in there to throw off the scent of Joe Simpson, but it sounds too complicated. I’ve already thought too hard about this, and that means having to look through those photos of Kate in a bikini again. There’s nothing that woman could do to look sexy short of getting a personality transplant.

Photos are from 12/8 and 11/29/10. Credit: Fame Pictures

Holly Madison and Kendra Wilkinson respond to the news of Hef’s engagement

Posted: 07 Jan 2011 10:18 AM PST

Two of Hef’s last set of girlfriends, Kendra Wilkinson and Holly Madison, have responded to the news of his engagement to 24 year-old Crystal Harris. Kendra was more congratulatory, which makes sense considering that her arrangement with Hef was more business than anything serious. Holly said she was surprised and that she had a hard time saying anything about it as she was afraid it wouldn’t sound sincere. Holly was hoping to marry Hef herself, and even shelled out her own money for IVF treatments trying to get pregnant back when they were together. When Hef’s sperm just sat there and shrugged, Holly packed up and left, supposedly realizing that she wanted more out of life. She doesn’t sound completely at peace with the news that Hef is marrying the next one to come along.

She had to share Hugh Hefner with two other ladies, but Kendra Wilkinson-Baskett wasn’t shocked to hear that Hef had decided to get engaged to Playmate Crystal Harris.

“I’m not surprised,” Kendra told Marc Malkin of E! Online. And as Malkin reports, Wilkinson-Baskett though this might go down all the way back when Hefner divorced Kimberley Conrad in September, 2009 — Hefner and Conrad had been separated since 1998.

“And then I heard how much he loves Crystal and how he looks at her,” Kendra said. “You can just tell there’s a whole other meaning of love in him. I feel like she’s the girl for him.”

Kendra’s sentiments contrasted completely with those expressed by Holly Madison, who was at one time Hef’s number one girl.

“I’m very surprised,” Madison told Malkin. “I have a lot of different feelings on it. I don’t just feel one way. I kind of didn’t want to put a generic statement out there like ‘Congratulations!’ because I felt everyone would see through that.”

Madison left Hefner in 2008, when she found out he couldn’t have any more children at his advanced age.

“I want to be with somebody I can have more of a future with eventually. Hef and I can’t get married and have kids,” she said at the time “So it was fun while it lasted but it wasn’t right for my old age. I got too old for Hef.”

[From The Huffington Post]

Last week we heard a rumor that Holly was upset that Crystal succeeded where she failed, and it seems like that was true. So did Holly just break up with Hef hoping he’d propose? It must be hard out there when you’re hustling and hosting bikini parties. Holly finally scored her own reality show but it took her a while. Meanwhile Kendra is taking tips from the Kardashian school of famewhoring. She’s got her own sex tape, reality show, and exaggerates her marital problems to earn tabloid covers followed by more headlines when she denies the stories she planted. Lord knows what happened to Bridget.

Holly is shown on 12/31 and 12/18/10. Kendra is shown on 1/5/11. Credit: WENN.com

This dude is younger than Hef by about 20 years.

Gwyneth Paltrow isn’t faring too well in ‘Country Strong’ reviews

Posted: 07 Jan 2011 10:06 AM PST

“Victory is mine, PEASANTS!!” - Goop.

Also, some SPOILERS below.

Once again, it is CRAZY SLOW today, so I'm searching for interesting stories. And then it occurred to me - Country Strong is opening in wide release today. Just how bad are the reviews? Well, they're pretty bad. Like, "Country Strong makes The Tourist look like Citizen Kane" bad. Gwyneth Paltrow's hopeful "comeback" lead role has a dismal 16% on Rotten Tomatoes. Her performance specifically is rubbing people the wrong way, but critics seem to have a problem with the entire film in general too. I imagine most people would have issues with a film in which a pregnancy country star got drunk and fell off the stage, miscarrying. I mean… come on. Here are some samplings from the reviews:

Toronto Star: "Much has been made of ice-queen Paltrow's conversion to country siren, by way of a few warbles that suggests she's really a hayseed at heart. But there's scant sonic evidence to prove it: all of her numbers in Country Strong, including the title tune, are reduced to brief snippets, often drowned out by her band or the roar of crowd-for-hire. Paltrow's Kelly Canter is more karaoke than country, but to be fair, it's not entirely her fault. The many tunes in Country Strong are of such astounding banality, it's as if they were written by caged chimps as they were driven through Nashville on the way to a medical research lab."

Roger Ebert: “Country Strong” is one of the best movies of 1957, and I mean that sincerely as a compliment… This is a movie into which Lee Remick and Rock Hudson and Sandra Dee would have slipped without shoehorns, and Douglas Sirk would have known where to march them. Its emotions are strong and visible. Its motives are clear. Its music performances are so good, we wish they lasted longer. Gwyneth Paltrow is so beautiful and is just really so nice that she brings enormous sympathy to her role. And Hedlund’s Beau would do anything for a woman — or two women, in this case… Another thing that places this movie in the 1950s milieu is its understanding of alcoholism. It thinks being drunk comes on people in sudden spurts, like a sneezing fit, and goes away when the plot needs it to. Kelly will be waving a vodka bottle at one moment and morosely pondering at the next. She (Paltrow, that is) has a lovely scene where she coaches young Chiles on what she needs to know about sweat stains, high heels and love."

Newark Star-Ledger: "Country Strong [is] a big musical drama with Gwyneth Paltrow as a fresh-from-rehab singer falling apart on the comeback trail. Full of self-regard, the picture even played Los Angeles last month, in order to qualify for possible Academy Awards. Confidence is a lovely thing. Sometimes. But "Country Strong," sadly, includes everything on the best-actress checklist except a performance — unless you consider two hours of Paltrow alternating between drunken crying jags and wan country warbling something more than a privileged star showing off…I mean, a country star who miscarried when she fell off the stage in a drunken stupor? And now coos to an orphaned baby bird she carries around in a cigar box? When she's not knocking Tony Lamas with her cute male nurse from the rehab center?"

Yeah… Ebert kind of liked it. I think he's a fan of The Goop. But this junk sounds hideous, it really does. Not only that, it also is starting to seem vaguely offensive, like THIS is what all of those Northern Aggressors think we're like in the South. Note to Hollywood (and Gwyneth specifically): Y'all need to actually spend some time in the South. Not everyone sounds like Britney Spears, not everyone listens to country music, not everyone drives a pickup truck, and we're not all hysterical lushes. Just FYI. Maybe Goop should devote a newsletter to her Brit-Brit twang. Wouldn't you love that?

Hot mess:

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Cele|bitchy

Cele|bitchy

No comments:

Post a Comment