The Superficial - Because You're Ugly |
- The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 12.12.12
- Justin Bieber Almost Got Murdered, Castrated
- Rihanna & Chris Brown Broke Up Before He Even Got A Chance To Kill Her. Romance Is Dead.
- Amanda Seyfried Gets Drunks For All Her TV Interviews, Needs To Marry Me
- I Want To Know Every Word Samuel L. Jackson & Jamie Foxx Said Here. Every Word.
- Anne Hathaway Won’t Stop Talking About Anne Hathaway’s Vagina
- Lindsay Lohan Will Probably Get Free Starbucks Instead of Jail. Yup.
- Straight Maple Gangsta, Son. O-Syrup-G.
- Kate Walsh In A Bikini And Other News
| The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 12.12.12 Posted: 12 Dec 2012 02:00 PM PST        Welcome back to your regularly scheduled The Crap We Missed which has been five days in the making, so you’re getting the creme de la creme of Boobdick Weirdfacery™. I’ve been scouring the photo agencies the past few days, trying to find pics worthy of a two day delay that you can blame entirely on Read More ...  |
| Justin Bieber Almost Got Murdered, Castrated Posted: 12 Dec 2012 01:15 PM PST        In case you’re wondering what the exact toll Justin Bieber is taking on America, he’s making hardened criminals in prison want to commit more hard crimes when I’m almost positive these individuals were “this” close to turning a corner. They had their whole lives ahead of them and he swaggered it away from them. WILL Read More ...  |
| Rihanna & Chris Brown Broke Up Before He Even Got A Chance To Kill Her. Romance Is Dead. Posted: 12 Dec 2012 12:30 PM PST        Because now that he can stop wondering if he could still totally get Rihanna even after biting and beating her beyond recognition, Chris Brown invited his ex Karrueche Tran to Paris to finish the rest of his tour with him which surprisingly Rihanna wasn’t putting up with even though this is practically the most respectful Read More ...  |
| Amanda Seyfried Gets Drunks For All Her TV Interviews, Needs To Marry Me Posted: 12 Dec 2012 11:43 AM PST        While Anne Hathaway‘s using her vagina to promote Les Miserables, Amanda Seyfried did the next best thing by being a chick with awesome breasts who likes to drink and bang. So basically they hired an angel to promote their movie. An honest-to-God angel. Does Jesus know you’re down here? Not that I’m asking if he’d Read More ...  |
| I Want To Know Every Word Samuel L. Jackson & Jamie Foxx Said Here. Every Word. Posted: 12 Dec 2012 10:51 AM PST        “Motherfucker threw water on them?! DAAAMMNN.” (WINNER: Least Plausible Caption 2012) What’s up, everybody? Thanks to my little schmoozing excursion to New York where I’ll let you decide whether I was Don, Pete or Roger Sterling (Trick Question: Cosgrove, bitches!), The Crap We Missed, our always reliable Most Important People comment generator hit the back-burner, Read More ...  |
| Anne Hathaway Won’t Stop Talking About Anne Hathaway’s Vagina Posted: 12 Dec 2012 09:27 AM PST        HER: And then, I got out of the car, and you could see my vagina. And everyone was like taking pictures of it, but I didn’t want them to take pictures of it because it’s my vagina… HIM: Are those the new Versace loafers? Goddamn… Like most people, I’ll never forget where I was the Read More ...  |
| Lindsay Lohan Will Probably Get Free Starbucks Instead of Jail. Yup. Posted: 12 Dec 2012 08:15 AM PST        Lindsay Lohan hasn’t even had her hearing today (Which she’s not even showing up to.) to see if she’ll face jail time for violating her probation and already she’s most likely ducked jail and getting free Starbucks from the judge because apparently California celebrity law isn’t ridiculous enough. TMZ reports: Commissioner Godfrey presides over Drug Read More ...  |
| Straight Maple Gangsta, Son. O-Syrup-G. Posted: 12 Dec 2012 07:08 AM PST        “When you roll in Miami, you roll hard, son” Justin Bieber probably wished he said while throwing an opened water bottle at the paparazzi yesterday (above). Which sounds ineffective to us mortals, but when blessed by the smooth, manicured hands of the Maple Christ, nothing but piles of ash are left in its wake. Ash Read More ...  |
| Kate Walsh In A Bikini And Other News Posted: 12 Dec 2012 06:46 AM PST        - This Britney Spears lookalike makes half a million dollars a year. Doesn’t even have to try. - Tom Cruise has a new movie opening, so ready the former Scientologists and their always hilarious stories of slave ships and girlfriend auditions. - Darwin The Ikea Monkey is an animal sanctuary now where Read More ...  |
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