Cele|bitchy |
- Gwyneth Paltrow latest goopy name-drop: Tom Cruise
- Was Jennifer Aniston drunk when she presented at the People’s Choice awards?
- Taylor Swift’s peach J. Mendel: pretty peach princess, or not that cute?
- LMAO: Lindsay Lohan building privacy fence so Sam Ronson won’t spy on her
- Ben Affleck’s new (actual) beard: cute or tragic?
- Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie spent $300 at a Missouri Kmart
- Katie Holmes talks about being styled by Suri again in Elle Mag
- Khloe Kardashian goes red: funky shade or pretty cute?
- Camille Grammer isn’t returning to RHOBH next season (Update: she quit)
- Natalie Portman’s pregnancy was a surprise, says Us Weekly
| Gwyneth Paltrow latest goopy name-drop: Tom Cruise Posted: 06 Jan 2011 08:58 AM PST Gwyneth Paltrow's press tour for the soon-to-be-total bomb Country Strong continues. It's actually enough to make me sympathetic towards Gwyneth - she used to be a decent actress, back in the day, under specific circumstances. How the mighty have fallen, etc. Except that it's impossible to have sympathy for Gwyneth when she's too busy gooping about how EVERYTHING in her life is so great, and how all of her "dear friends" are just amazing, and didn't you hear that she recently ran into her best friend Beyonce and they were discussing her best friend Robert Downey Jr., and then Deepak Chopra and Brad Pitt came over and wasn't that weird? Gwyneth hasn't spoken to them since she last saw Ben Affleck, over at Madonna's… or maybe it was Stella McCartney's. Or Valentino's. Didn't you hear, Anna Wintour just told me how they redid that castle, she stayed there with her loving husband Chris Martin, who appreciates her so much. So, name-dropping is an art Gwyneth has mastered, and she's been doing it through the whole press tour. The latest name-drop: Tom Cruise. Seriously, Goop? You're going to whore out Tom Cruise's name to help you sell your Britney Spears bender movie?
[From People] Is it sad? Or funny? I know Gwyneth-defenders say that she's just a bit snooty and stuck up her own ass, but that she's overall a good person. Maybe. Or maybe she's just awful and completely terrible. Or something in between. I'll buy that she's a great mom, and that she's in a bad marriage, and that she's too uptight and snotty to consider a divorce, which she likely thinks is merely for peasants. I'll also buy that her career is very funky at this point, and she might want to consider sticking to character roles or period pieces, something where she doesn't have to be the centerpiece. Also, about Goop and her drinking: “You just get really drunk all the time. Which is awesome! At least I did anyway, it’s not very professional. There’s a Bloody Mary at 10 a.m. and keep it going all day!” This explains so much. Photos courtesy of WENN.      |
| Was Jennifer Aniston drunk when she presented at the People’s Choice awards? Posted: 06 Jan 2011 08:28 AM PST Okay, I didn't watch the People's Choice Awards. I'm depending on other sites for my information. So I didn't even know that Jennifer Aniston was there, and that she was the first presenter of the evening (she gave an award to Adam Sandler). When I was looking through Gawker, they had a post up asking what was wrong with Aniston during her presenting duties. I watched the video, and for about 10 seconds, I was all "Nit-picking, she's fine." And then she slurred the word "serious". I mean, she says it all drunky, like "surress". It's not an accent - she's not Southern, y'all. Bitch is drunk. Watching it the second time, you can see how she seems to slur "laughed" as well, in addition to ending her presenting duties in a hurry, like all of us drunks know how to do: “I’mfinedon’tbotherme.” Now, the People's Choice is not the Golden Globes. It's not like getting hammered is absolutely mandatory to sit through the evening. I'm sure there probably is a bar or an alcohol-filled greenroom for presenters, but that doesn't change the fact that Aniston was THE FIRST presenter. Meaning she didn't have time to get drunk at the show, she had to have showed up at the ceremony drunk. Ah, Aniston. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Taylor Swift’s peach J. Mendel: pretty peach princess, or not that cute? Posted: 06 Jan 2011 07:58 AM PST These are photos of Taylor Swift at last night's People's Choice Awards. Swifty was by far one of the biggest celebrities who walked the red carpet, although there were some bigger names in attendance. Those bigger celebrities just didn't walk the red carpet, unfortunately. I think that sends a weird message to your fans - like, there are so many people who love the red carpet stuff, and wait outside to get autographs, and the event is all about "the people" voting for the stars they like, and you're not even going to walk the red carpet? Anyway, sorry for that digression. Swifty is wearing J. Mendel, a designer she has worn before. Swifty opted for this ice-creamy shade of peach for her big first public outing since she and Jake Gyllenhaal split. Because she's a princess! And girls should ONLY wear pastels, right? Us Weekly points out that Swifty was "surrounded by exes" at the show. Those exes: Cory Monteith and Taylor Lautner. I was hoping for John Mayer, alas, we can't always get what we want. However, Swifty did go to the People's Choice awards with a "mystery man" - her brother, Austin Swift (who is really cute). She also spent time backstage hanging out with Selena Gomez, Ellen DeGeneres, Drew Barrymore, and Zac Efron, and signing autographs for whoever wanted them (good for her). Us Weekly points out that their sources claim Swifty is "really upset" about the Gyllenhaal breakup, and one source says: "We told her not to move so fast with this but she didn’t listen." Photos courtesy of Fame.    |
| LMAO: Lindsay Lohan building privacy fence so Sam Ronson won’t spy on her Posted: 06 Jan 2011 07:29 AM PST These are some new photos of Lindsay Lohan, out and about in LA yesterday. She's still calling the paparazzi on herself, and she's still absolutely thrilled to be photographed. I also think her busted weave is looking less busted, and blonder. I swear, she and her mother look the same age - both look like boozy floozies in their 40s, and like they have leather jackets that say "Stain's Bitch" on them. Anyway, there are a bunch of somewhat minor Lohan stories today. First - Lindsay's assault victim, Dawn Chapman, released a statement saying in essence that we should all just leave poor little Lindsay alone. Yeah, Dawn got paid. Let's see… oh, Lindsay spent some time with Jamie Lee Curtis, her "mom" from Freaky Friday. I don't even want to think about what that conversation sounded like. Jamie: "Hey, sweetheart, how are you doing?" Lindsay: "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT I'M FINE LEAVE ME ALONE." But this is the story that really made my day - so Lindsay is moving in right beside Samantha Ronson's house in Venice Beach. And yesterday TMZ had an absolutely hilarious story about how Lindsay "didn't know" she was moving in right beside the woman she's been stalking for two years. And now Radar reports… wait… LMAO… that Lindsay wants to build a privacy fence around her property so that Sam won't be able to "spy or see" Lindsay. Jesus Christ, crackhead.
[From Radar] Lindsay is going to supervise the building of the fence. And she will scream with crack rage at you if you mention that the "fence" looks more like a one-sided ladder built specifically so that Lindsay can spy on Samantha on every level of Sam's home. God bless this crackhead, you know? She thinks she's being so sly, so clever, so nonchalant. Like we won't notice that she's violently obsessed with Samantha to the point of total cracked-out delusion. Photos courtesy of Fame.    |
| Ben Affleck’s new (actual) beard: cute or tragic? Posted: 06 Jan 2011 07:04 AM PST
I finally saw The Town over the holidays and I have to say I was blown away. Kaiser says that Affleck is a better director than he is an actor. He did play a meaty role that he might not have been able to score on his own, but we also have to give him credit for stepping aside and letting his costars, like Jeremy Renner and Jon Hamm, shine. I thought he did an excellent job, and I also found my girlhood (ok, early 20s) crush on Ben renewed. The guy is gorgeous and there’s something troubled about him, or maybe he just played that character with such subtly that I found myself thinking he was playing himself. I like Ben and I’d love to see him get an Oscar nom for best director. That’s really where his talent lies, but he’s a decent actor too. Does he work that beard though? Hell no, the guy has a gorgeous face. Maybe he’s trying to go incognito given how much the paparazzi hound him and his family. It doesn’t look like it’s working. Shave it, Ben! Also, how cute are those glasses on Violet? Credit to Kaiser for that title! Photos are credit: WENN.com    |
| Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie spent $300 at a Missouri Kmart Posted: 06 Jan 2011 07:00 AM PST This is just a nice little story to cleanse your palate from yesterday's Star Magazine cover story about Angelina Jolie needing to go to rehab (which, yes, had very little to do with heroin, despite the cover line lie). This story is about the Jolie-Pitts trip to Missouri last week, and where they went. Apparently, Angelina and Brad are Kmart shoppers. For real. Us Weekly reports that Angelina and Brad went to Kmart (with Pax and Zahara) in Springfield, Missouri, and spent about $300. Now, I'm not some kind of hardcore elitist, but even I don't shop at Kmart. Is the Kmart in my town particularly trashy? Yes, it is. I always feel like I'm about to be stabbed just driving by the place. So what does it say about Angelina and Brad that they shop at Kmart?
[From Us Weekly, print edition] Cosmetics and toys? You're going to go bargain shopping at Kmart and you're not even going to check out the Martha Stewart Everyday Living line? The hell? Martha sells some nice stuff at Kmart. That's the only reason to even visit! Also - Benihana? Is that better or worse than taking the kids to McDonalds? I think it's about the same, don't you? Brangelina: Just like us. Next thing you know, the paparazzi will get a shot of Brad scratching his balls on the front lawn while Angelina files her nails as she watches The Price Is Right. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Katie Holmes talks about being styled by Suri again in Elle Mag Posted: 06 Jan 2011 06:39 AM PST Katie Holmes is the cover girl for the February issue of Elle Magazine. I could have sworn she was just recently the cover girl, just a few months ago. Where is it…ah, November 2009. Not as recently as I thought. But you'll have to forgive me, because most of Katie's interviews are the same thing - she always talks about Suri's style, and how Suri dresses her, and then Katie goes on to talk up her own style, as if Suri gets it from her. Not so much, Kate-Bot. Suri gets her love of high heels and pretty princess fashion from her dad. Just sayin'. Anyway, I think Katie is promoting her role as Jackie Kennedy in the History Channel's miniseries, because she talks a lot about Jackie in the interview:
[From Elle Magazine] It is startling to realize that Jackie lost baby Patrick just a few months before Jack was assassinated. I remember reading a Jackie biography years ago and figuring out how quickly those two events happened in succession. It's no wonder Jackie was so beloved for so many years - people had tremendous sympathy for her, and she was a world-wide icon. Now, how will the zombie known as Katie Holmes do with the role of Jackie? I have no idea. Jackie didn't talk out of the side of her mouth, I know that much. Strike one, Kate-Bot. Also - I love the idea of Suri vetoing Katie's pants. It cracks me up. Photos courtesy of Elle.    |
| Khloe Kardashian goes red: funky shade or pretty cute? Posted: 06 Jan 2011 06:07 AM PST The Kardashians won last night at the People's Choice Awards. That's pretty much all you need to know about the People's Choice Awards. I'm sure I'll be covering stuff from the show all day, but in case you wanted to see a full list of winners, go here. Anyway, back to the Kardashians - they all coordinated their outfits, of course, and I'm not even going to bother looking up the designers, mainly because even when the girls are wearing Chanel couture, they still manage to make it look cheap, and like budget stripper-wear. Oh, the Jenner girls were there too - Kendall and the other one. The biggest news, however, was that Khloe is going red. And not like "Khloe ANGRY. KHLOE SEE RED." As in, Khloe is lightening her hair to a weird shade of red.
[From Us Weekly] Well, out of all of them, Khloe is the one most likely to pull off the color, just because her sisters seems hellbent on tanning and whatever else to make themselves look like "Snooki Lite". Seriously, what's going on with Kourtney? Does she think this is a good look? Anyway, regarding Khloe: I hope the red doesn’t stick around. I liked her as a brunette. She doesn’t really have the skin tone to pull off this red shade. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Camille Grammer isn’t returning to RHOBH next season (Update: she quit) Posted: 06 Jan 2011 06:00 AM PST
[From The Hollywood Reporter] Camille is entertaining in a trainwreck kind of way, but her extreme narcissism gets old fast. She doesn’t have much to offer besides nastiness, and while that’s fun to gossip about it’s not easy to watch. She predictable, and every week she does mean, self-centered things and then accuses Kyle of the very behavior we’ve seen Camille engage in. No one wants to see the villain triumph or even continue to cling to her weak-minded view of a world that will always center around her. We know all about Camille and her sad privileged world and we know that she’ll never change. She’ll lose her husband soon, though, and there are plenty of people who are hoping we’ll get to see her lizard face fall when she realizes that Kelsey isn’t coming back. There’s a new episode of Real Housewives coming this Thursday. Update: Radar Online reports that Camille quit the RHOBH a day after taping the reunion show on Tuesday. Here are some vintage photos of Camille. The header is from 2009 and the other photos are dated below. Credit: PRPhotos. 2008: 2006: 2005: 2004:    |
| Natalie Portman’s pregnancy was a surprise, says Us Weekly Posted: 06 Jan 2011 05:45 AM PST Natalie Portman is pregnant, engaged, and one of the leading contenders for this year's Best Actress Oscar. Is it fair to rake her over the coals? Eh. While I'm not her biggest fan, I'm not hugely interested in (metaphorically) beating up on a pregnant woman. Do you sense a big caveat coming? Of course. Considering Natalie's pregnancy-and-engagement announcement took most people by surprise, the tabloids are doing what they love to do - digging up dirt on someone new. Us Weekly has an interesting story on Natalie and her beloved, Benjamin Millepied, in this week's issue. Their sources confirm many of the rumors we've already heard about Benjamin - that he was very much involved with a dancer when he met Natalie, and that there was some overlap in the two relationships. Us Weekly's sources also give the impression that Benjamin is, in fact, a fame-hungry star-f-cker who is looking to build a career on his association with Natalie. One more thing - the pregnancy wasn't planned, and Benjamin only proposed after Natalie got pregnant.
[From Us Weekly, print edition] My favorite quote is from the Portman source: "He fell in love with someone else. He pursued Natalie. That was on him." Ah, that's wonderful. If only everyone thought that way! If only everyone just blamed the cheating guy for being a womanizing douche, and no one ever blamed the woman he was screwing. Notice that the Portman source doesn't really say if Natalie KNEW Benjamin was already in a relationship when he began pursuing her. Oh, well. "That was on him." Also, I agree with some of your theories that Benjamin was the one poking holes in the condoms. He hit the jackpot with this one, didn't he? By the way, Natalie was at the People’s Choice Awards last night, but it doesn’t look like she took her bump to the red carpet. Sigh… I think this is probably going to be happening a lot. So many awards shows, so many opportunities for Natalie to remind us that she’s too good to walk a red carpet. Anyway, you can see some shots of Natalie backstage with her bump here, at HuffPo. Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
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