Sunday, May 20, 2012

Cele|bitchy

Cele|bitchy


Cannes: Salma Hayek & Jada Pinkett bring out their inner drag queens & more

Posted: 20 May 2012 06:33 AM PDT

These are some assorted photos from the Cannes Film Festival from the past… let's say, 48 hours. There were a few big premieres, although… I don't think some of these films are actually in competition. Like, Madagascar 3 isn't in competition. Lawless is, although the star of Lawless, Ryan Gosling, didn't show up to Cannes. (Update: Sorry, I thought Gosling is in that movie – guess not). Anyway. These photos aren't all-inclusive or anything, these are just the dudes and ladies and dresses I wanted to talk about. Go ahead and yell at me.

First up! Salma Hayek (with Francois-Henri Pinault) in Gucci at the Madagascar 3 premiere. It's very… eh. I prefer when Salma goes for cleaner, simpler styles. This whole look seems very showgirl and drag queen to me.

Gerard Butler was at Friday night's Haiti Benefit. He's done a lot of work with charities related to Haiti. I'm surprised he looks so clean and sober, aren't you?

We need to have a conversation about Tom Hardy's giant, furry beard. The conversation: I want that beard to be tickling my thighs. End of conversation. (PS… Shia LaBeouf looks gross.).

Guy Pearce!!! He was at the photo call for Lawless. I love him so much. I dig his flannel too, for some strange reason. He looks hot.

Jada Pinkett Smith in Alberta Ferretti. This was my favorite look from Jada for all of her Cannes appearances – and this is just what she wore to the Madagascar 3 photo call! It's a great color for her.

Jada's worst look? This Atelier Versace in orange and gold that she wore the M3 premiere. God, that's just awful.

Jessica Chastain in white. AGAIN. This one is Armani – it's a beautiful dress, and it would have made a gorgeous wedding dress. Try a different color, Jessica.

And here's Jessica in gold Gucci. Eh. I don't hate it, but I don't love it either.

Charlotte Casiraghi in Gucci, walking the carpet for Once Upon A Time In America. Doesn't she look so much like her mother? She's gorgeous. But! She's a terrible sloucher. I know it's all "I'm sort of French, I'm royal, I'm beautiful, I don't have to stand up straight or wear clothes that are tailored." But still. Stand up straight.

Photos courtesy of WENN.
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Mark Zuckerberg married his long-time girlfriend Priscilla Chan in Palo Alto

Posted: 20 May 2012 05:51 AM PDT

Mark Zuckerberg wedding photo
Update by CB: Mark posted this photo on Facebook of his wedding, which you can see after you subscribe to him.


I didn't even know Mark Zuckerberg was engaged, did you? Well, the shocking news this morning: Mark Zuckerberg married his long-time girlfriend Priscilla Chan last night in Palo Alto, CA. When that movie, The Social Network, was a thing about a year and a half ago, there were suddenly lots of photos of Zuck and Priscilla out and about – like, they became paparazzi targets. It was interesting because the film painted Zuck as somewhat of a confused misogynist, when in reality, Zuck and Priscilla have been together for years and years, and you never really hear stories about him mistreating ladies or anything. Mark and Priscilla have been living together too, and their wedding took place in their backyard. Nice. You can see a wedding photo here – her wedding gown isn't super-amazing, but she looks really pretty in the photo. And Zuck didn't wear a tuxedo hoodie! Yay.

A day after Mark Zuckerberg took his company, Facebook, public, the CEO updated his relationship status to “married.”

Zuckerberg, 28, and his longtime girlfriend Priscilla Chan exchanged vows at a small ceremony in their backyard attended by less than 100 guests in Palo Alto, Calif., on Saturday.

Guests thought they were coming over for a surprise party to celebrate Chan’s graduation from UCSF medical school, where on May 14 she received her degree in pediatrics. However, Zuckerberg and Chan had been planning the wedding for more than four months, according to a source authorized by the couple.

Zuckerberg designed Chan’s wedding ring, a simple ruby sparkler, himself.

Guests dined family-style on food from the couple’s favorite restaurants, Palo Alto Sol and Fuki Sushi. For dessert, they had Burdick Chocolate “mice” – whimsical chocolate treats made in the shape of mice – which the couple had on their first date.

The couple, who met while attending Harvard before Zuckerberg – who is now worth more than $19 billion – started Facebook, have been dating for nine years.

Zuckerberg, the subject of the movie The Social Network, had been in the news all week for the highly-anticipated stock offering of his company.

[From People]

I've heard that Priscilla is just as much of a genius as Mark, and it's really cool that she just graduated from medical school, and I can imagine her life is going to be overtaken by her residency and all of that for the next few years. I like that Mark went with a smart woman who is doing her own thing. Hopefully, she will be to him what Melinda Gates is to Bill Gates – an incredibly intelligent woman who inspires her husband to be a better human being. Melinda Gates is given a lot of credit for how she and Bill Gates give their money away (making The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation the gold standard of "how to run a charity/foundation like an efficient business"). Zuckerberg has already pledged a great deal of his fortune to charity – but that was a year and a half ago. He just took his company public, and now he's even richer. Maybe The Mark & Priscilla Zuckerberg Foundation is next?

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.
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Will Smith shoved, slapped an overly affectionate Ukrainian reporter in Moscow

Posted: 20 May 2012 05:23 AM PDT

Maybe I've been doing this job for too long, but I don't understand why this story is such a big deal. It's the "top story" on several different sites, and on several different media outlets. The headline? "Will Smith slaps reporter after reporter tries to kiss him." Eh?

The backstory: Will was at the Moscow premiere of Men In Black III, walking the red carpet and stopping to talk to nearly every media outlet (or flat-out every media outlet). Celebrities like Will (and like Tom Cruise) are old-school: when they're promoting something, they will work a red carpet. HARD. They will make sure everybody gets a quote and some face-time. So, Will stops at one outlet, does a little interview, and then moves on to the next outlet, where a Ukrainian reporter is waiting for his moment to shine. The reporter shakes Will's hand, kisses one of Will's cheeks, twists around and kisses the other cheek, then moves in for a mouth-to-mouth kiss. Will shoves the guy away, and starts to walk to the next outlet, then reaches back and – using the back of his hand – slaps the reporter on his cheek. Will says to the next outlet, "He’s lucky I didn’t sucker punch him.” Then Will continued down the line, giving interviews and autographs. This incident all went down in a matter of seconds, and there's plenty of video:

Now, should Will have back-handed the guy? No. I think the shove was sufficient enough to say "Seriously, NOT COOL." Playing devil's advocate, would you feel differently if it was a female celebrity who was being man-handled on the press line? TMZ says this Ukrainian reporter is "known" for being really kissy with celebrities. Er…? He should stop. TMZ also notes pointedly that Will just came out in support of gay marriage, which I think is an unfair aside. Gay or straight, man or woman, everybody has the right to NOT be manhandled by strangers. I want to believe – and I really do hope – that this was some knee-jerk "OMG, I was kissed by a man!" homophobic reaction from Will. What I mean is that I don't think it's a reflection on his sexuality, whatever that may be. I think it's simply a reflection of Will not wanting to have some stranger's lips all over his face.

Photos of Will promoting 'MIB III' in London last week, courtesy of WENN.
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Duchess Kate in a $1800 pink coatdress in London: gorgeous & appropriate?

Posted: 20 May 2012 05:23 AM PDT

I'm sorry we're so late in covering these photos! They're from Friday, during the day, but we only got access to them late on Friday night. Considering everybody is running with the same photos, I'm thinking these were taken by the official royal event photographer, and then circulated to the photo agencies. The event? The Queen hosted a special all-royal lunch in honor of her Diamond Jubilee. And when I say "all royal" I mean "every royal head of state in the world." Even the Emperor of Japan showed up! In total, there were "24 Kings and Queens, one Emperor, a Grand Duke and a Sultan." The Sultan of Brunei, of course. Also included? "Eight princesses, an Emir and a lone Empress." Prince Albert and Princess Charlene of Monaco were there too!

So for the special lunch (in which all of these royals just stood around, clutching champagne or water and quietly muttering bitchy things), the Queen made sure that Prince William and Duchess Kate were in attendance. For the (day) occasion, Kate kept her hair down and her curls magnificently sausage-y and bouncy. I guess it's fine for a day event, although I really did hope that we had turned on a corner as far pulling her hair up. Sigh. Kate also wore a $1800-2000 coatdress from Emilia Wickstead. She accessorized with an ornate brooch and big earrings, all of which you can barely see because of her enormous hair. I do kind of like her in pink, though. It's not my taste, but she looks cute.

I'm also including photos of Princess Charlene, with her new short 'do all twerked up. I love that shade of blue on her, but seeing Charlene and Kate stand next to each other, talking to each other… it's disconcerting. Charlene looks less plastic when she's next to Kate, and Kate looks MORE plastic. Weird, right? I swear, Kate's face looks "tight" while Charlene looks more energetic than we've seen in previous months. Also: I would LOVE to know what Kate and Queen Rania had to say to each other. Scratch that – I would LOVE to know what Queen Rania really thinks of Kate.

PS… Yes, Kate sipped white wine. She's not pregnant.

Photos courtesy of WENN.
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Lindsay Lohan & Paris Hilton partied together until 7 a.m., when the cops came

Posted: 20 May 2012 05:22 AM PDT

In case you didn't notice last week, I was kind of recovering from a Cracken Bender. Like, most of the time, I kind of enjoy making fun of Lindsay Lohan just because A) she deserves it because she's the least sympathetic person ever (aside from actual war criminals) and B) in her crack-addled mind, she KNOWS she's incredibly awesome, so what does it even matter? So… I needed a little break, and CB covered LL's appearance on Glee - which, from what I gather, was barely two minutes of cracked-out timing and dumb jokes. So, considering that LL's "comeback" is in full swing and that Lifetime "Liz & Dick" monstrosity is due to begin filming in two weeks or so, how is Lindsay spending her time? Why, she's sitting at home, soberly reading her Bible. Just kidding, she's partying until 7 am with Paris Hilton, and the party only ends when the cops come.

They both have long-standing reputations as Hollywood wild ones. And Paris Hilton, 31, and Lindsay Lohan, 25, didn’t do themselves any favours after attending a raucous party at a LA home until the early hours of Saturday morning.

Police were called to the Hollywood Hills residence after neighbours filed a noise complaint, according to onlookers. Paris was spotted leaving the property wearing dark sunglasses and a cap along with her friend, oil heir Brandon Davis.

Lindsay is understood to have made an undercover exit, hiding under a towel in the back seat of a friend’s car.

Lindsay and Paris are clearly on good terms again after a spectacular feud dating back to 2006, when the hotel heiress and Brandon crudely nicknamed her Firecrocth. The Mean Girls actress has been attempting to resuscitate her flagging career and recently made a guest appearance on Glee. But she reported to be a ‘total nightmare’ on the set of the hit show – which stars Lea Michele, Corey Monteith and Matthew Morrison – because she turned up late and did not know her lines.

Meanwhile Paris, who is dating DJ Afrojack, has been inspired to try a career change by her new beau. She will debut her DJ set in Sao Paulo, Brazil on June 23 in front 30,000 people. She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez.

[From The Mail]

Wait, what? "She will be following a performance by Kelly Clarkson and Jennifer Lopez." As in, Jennifer Lopez and Kelly Clarkson are opening for… Paris Hilton? That can't be right. As for the partying and such… of course. Why do Paris and Lindsay keep circling each other like the last crackies eyeing up the last crack rock? I get that they have "similar interests" and probably the same number of brain cells. But for God's sake… I feel like this is 2006 all over again.

By the way, remember photographer Tyler Shields, the dude who took all of those crazy photos of The Cracken playing with a gun? Well, he did a new photo shoot with Lindsay for Vault Magazine – the photos haven't been released yet, but part of Tyler's interview has been excerpted. Isn't that funny? Lindsay isn't interviewed – Tyler Shields is. Oh, and Shields is a douche. He tells Vault, "People said she (Lindsay) was unstable, so I decided to show them what they were already believing, what they already chose to see." He also says, "I'm not a label. I'm not a fashion. I'm not a celebrity…I'll buy a Ferrari and blow it up. I come across so many people who are afraid to live. I want to give them a window to another world. I don't believe in fear." For goodness sake. You know who was a truly fearless photographer? The late Tim Hetherington. Tyler Shields is just a hack regurgitating pop culture clichés, and he thinks that's somehow groundbreaking. It's not.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
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