The Superficial - Because You're Ugly |
- The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 5.23.12
- And Now For The Part of Cannes Where Michelle Rodriguez Wears A Bikini And Jumps Off Things
- Hey! Take Yo’ Gotdamn Shoes Off Before You Get On Diddy’s Boat
- Tara Reid Is All The Rage In Europe
- Courtney Stodden Is Very Subtle
- Of Course John Mayer Uses ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ To Pick Up Chicks
- Snooki’s Having A Boy
- Tracy Morgan is Khloe Kardashian’s Father
- Good Morning, Irina Shayk, And Other News
| The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 5.23.12 Posted: 23 May 2012 02:00 PM PDT        Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed that unapologetically begins and ends with Kelly Brook, because I understand how to keep a job that lets me work in my jam-jams. We’ve also got Jennifer Love Hewitt whose flight obviously arrived just after Cinnabon closed, but Zac Efron‘s got there just in time for him to Read More ... |
| And Now For The Part of Cannes Where Michelle Rodriguez Wears A Bikini And Jumps Off Things Posted: 23 May 2012 12:40 PM PDT        Here’s Michelle Rodriguez at Eden Roc where she stays every year for Cannes because she’s a bisexual spider-monkey who constantly dives off shit. Also, they let her jump on top of cars as they pull up so people can feed her grapes through a cracked window. “Ha, look, honey, she’s grabbing your tit. We loved Read More ... |
| Hey! Take Yo’ Gotdamn Shoes Off Before You Get On Diddy’s Boat Posted: 23 May 2012 11:50 AM PDT        You and I live boring, conventional lives where getting invited over to someone’s house and being asked to remove our shoes is generally accepted because we all know shampooing carpets takes fucking forever. Also, shoes are violent oppressors whose shackles I’ve long since escaped, you toesy-restricting bastards. Anyway, when someone like Diddy throws a lavish Read More ... |
| Tara Reid Is All The Rage In Europe Posted: 23 May 2012 10:55 AM PDT        Earlier this morning, I linked to an article on Lainey Gossip that identified Tara Reid‘s date to a Cannes yacht party as diamond mogul Fawaz Gruosi, so here are a bunch more pics of Tara at Cannes because apparently filthy rich Europeans can’t get enough of her. They’re so forward thinking. “I do say, Reginald, Read More ... |
| Courtney Stodden Is Very Subtle Posted: 23 May 2012 10:19 AM PDT        In case you thought Courtney Stodden only wears lingerie to bake with her mom, here she is not so much washing a Mercedes as her heaving, child-bride implants except I don’t even know why I just said child-bride because, let’s be realistic, they’re not even pretending she’s 17 anymore. At this rate, the next themed Read More ... |
| Of Course John Mayer Uses ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ To Pick Up Chicks Posted: 23 May 2012 09:01 AM PDT        John Mayer has a new album to promote, so it’s time to make with what he thinks are hilarious slice-of-life stories about how much pussy he gets because he’s so super-rich it doesn’t even matter that he walks around pretending to be Johnny Depp. Or homeless. I don’t even know how you tell the difference. Read More ... |
| Posted: 23 May 2012 07:39 AM PDT        Because soon people will realize they’ve been hypnotized into staring at the warthog from The Lion King get the clap and stop watching, Snooki is selling every last detail of her pregnancy to anyone with a checkbook and/or pack of Slim Jims. So here she is exclusively revealing to In Touch that she’s having a Read More ... |
| Tracy Morgan is Khloe Kardashian’s Father Posted: 23 May 2012 07:08 AM PDT  Okay, so that headline may not be entirely true – Although, she did turn down that DNA test. – but it is one of the 800 random things Tracy Morgan said during his appearance on Conan last night which are always fucking hilarious. I don’t want to oversell it, but the Charlton Heston bit was Read More ... |
| Good Morning, Irina Shayk, And Other News Posted: 23 May 2012 06:40 AM PDT        - A woman's abs are like magic. - Apparently jabbing your penis into a pile of Silly Putty with tits is the new Faberge Egg. - Weird Things Your Favorite Teen And Child Stars Are Up To Now - So Brad Pitt really has no intention of marrying Angelina Jolie. That’s Read More ... |
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