Cele|bitchy

Jennifer Lopez used to flash her vadge in Cuba, in the 1990s
Star: Britney Spears claims Jason Trawick abused her (update: audio?)
Tom Cruise keeps stealing Katie Holmes’ makeup
Angelina Jolie’s grey coat porn in Paris: boring or simply professional?
Chelsea Handler on 50 Cent: ‘I call him Curtis when we’re having sex’, ‘he can’t swim’
Jessica Simpson pregnancy rumors heat up after tree-lighting appearance
Jaylor/Jwifty pose for hilarious Us Weekly cover
Kate Gosselin on The Today Show: ‘This is not abnormal,’ ‘It’s a heaven on earth job’
Natalie Portman in Dior at the Black Swan premiere: lovely or surly?
Jim Carrey says Ewan McGregor is “a great kisser” & “a dream come true”

Jennifer Lopez used to flash her vadge in Cuba, in the 1990s

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 08:54 AM PST

Jennifer Lopez's history with her first husband Ojani Noa is tortured. I don't have the time or the inclination to go into their history (here for our Ojani Noa archives), but basically, Ojani has spent the past five-six years trying to make as much money off of his ex-wife as possible. He's given interviews about what Jennifer was like in private (including the claim that she's hardcore into voodoo), and he's been trying to sell videos of Jennifer (from when they were together) for years. There's even been some mention of sex tapes, I believe. Anyway, Radar has an interview with Ojani's lawyer, and it looks like the next big fight is going to be over hours and hours of video of Jennifer Lopez wandering around Cuba without her drawers on. Yes, she was just trying to let her vadge breathe, and now some H8R wants to take her down!

Jennifer Lopez is caught on hours of new video “exposing her genital area in public” and displaying other “deviant behavior”, according to documents just filed in the singer’s high-stakes legal fight to keep the tapes secret. The Jenny From The Block singer has taken ex-husband Ojani Noa and his agent Ed Meyer to court to stop their purported release and marketing attempt of sexy videos made during the couple’s short-lived marriage.

“JLo is riding a scooter in public in Cuba, while talking to the camera and numerous by-standers, with her privates in as plain view as Paris Hilton, Britany Spears and Lindsay Lohan have in the past,” said Ed Meyer, a rep for Lopez’s ex-hubby. “This is among other nudity on her part in the now 21 hours of home movies, that we have so far recovered.”

The tape does not contain full-on sex, but is said to grant a revealing glimpse of the singer, including her with “no underwear” and “vagina in plain view”, RadarOnline.com has learned.

Noa and Meyer are producing and marketing for sale a feature film about Lopez’s tumultuous first marriage to Noa, a Cuban immigrant, chef and model.

In a document filed in California Court of Appeal on November 17, Meyer said: “In Noa’s Home Videos, Lopez displays deviant behavior by consensually exposing her genital area in public, however, Noa & Meyer have never ever intended to market this and the many other racy, damaging & expositive scenes from the Home Videos. It must also be stated that in Noa’s Home Videos, Lopez gives her full consent to Noa taping her.”

Meyer added, “The movie may or may not integrate “G” rated scenes from Noa’s own Home Videos, or possibly the “G” rated scenes from Noa’s own Home Videos may be marketed separately as a “fan friendly” Home Video DVD Collection.”

“Ojani keeps finding more tapes that he didn’t even realize that he still had,” Meyer told RadarOnline.com in an exclusive interview.

“We had 17 hours at the start, and we now have just over 21 hours of home videos.”
Lopez is claiming Noa and filmmaker Meyer are violating an injunction blocking the release on the basis that the video is private and personal.

But in the court filing, Meyer argued he could not be held to a previous settlement between JLO and Noa, because he never benefitted from it, nor did he even know Noa at that time.

[From Radar]

Meh. Is this scandalous? Not really. I mean… who really needs to see Jennifer Lopez's vagina at this point? Granted, her vadge isn't something that she's put out there for public consumption. But is there really some big demand for Jlo vadge pics or video? Eh. Also: Ojani sounds like such a toolbox.

Star: Britney Spears claims Jason Trawick abused her (update: audio?)

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 08:30 AM PST

Star Magazine has an uncomfortable story about Britney Spears on their cover this week. According to Britney's first husband Jason Alexander, who gives Star an "exclusive interview", Britney told Jason Alexander that Jason Trawick has been beating her up. The cover photo allegedly shows Britney with a black eye - which, it could be, or it could just be that Britney has screwed up makeup. Oh, and Britney was pregnant…? Jesus. I hope none of this is true:

After her very public breakdown and a string of failed romances, Britney Spears made a tremendous comeback — professionally and personally — largely because of her agent-turned-boyfriend Jason Trawick, who helped her rebuild her career and life. But in a blockbuster world exclusive, Star has learned that the relationship has turned violent!

In our Dec. 13 issue, on sale today, Britney’s former husband Jason Alexander tells Star that the pop princess confided to him that Trawick beat her — on multiple occasions.

“Britney is in an abusive relationship,” the entertainer’s first husband says in a detailed interview with Star. “She told me her life had turned into a nightmare.”

Childhood friends Britney and Alexander stayed in touch after their 55-hour marriage was annulled in 2004. But their casual texts, phone calls and emails took a dark turn when she recently confided that Trawick “hit her so hard it gave her a black eye,” Alexander says.

And the abuse wasn’t a solitary incident, Alexander tells Star in our issue. Nor was it the only jaw-dropping secret the megastar told her ex! She also revealed that she had been pregnant with Trawick's child earlier this year, Alexander says.

Alexander says he’s telling this story because he’s “really concerned” for Britney who he feels is "telling me these secrets as a way of getting out of this."

For the entire shocking story — including photos of a battered and bruised Britney, the messages she sent her ex and the details about her secret pregnancy — pick up Star today.

[From Star Magazine]

The fact that Jason Alexander is giving the interview and that he has no qualms about being a named source does give me pause. I also think it's possible that Britney did tell him some of this stuff, but that doesn't mean it's actually true. If it is true, however, I hope that her daddy steps in and straightens this mess out. Britney is still under her conservatorship, and it was just extended into next year:

Britney Spears will ring in the new year under her long-standing conservatorship …. sources tell TMZ. We’re told there are no plans to end the conservatorship, which was created in February 2008.

And, it’s not bad news for Britney. We’re told she’s “content” with the current arrangement and is no longer antsy to end it.

Britney is actually under two conservatorships — one to care for her, and another to take care of her business affairs. As for the latter, it will probably remain in place for a long time, because Britney Spears, Inc. has never run more smoothly.

As for the personal conservatorship … we’re told no one involved — Britney included — wants to end it.

[From TMZ]

In my opinion, I think the fact that Britney is still under conservatorship makes any possible accusation of abuse that much more serious - it's like a mental patient or a child is being abused. That being said, it's totally possible that Jason Alexander is making the whole thing up. We'll see… there could be denials about this story soon.

UPDATE: Radar (which is basically the same company as Star) has more on this situation here. Apparently, Jason Alexander taped this conversation with Britney, and you can go to Radar to hear the audio. Honestly, I don’t think it sounds like Britney, but the sound quality isn’t awesome, so maybe it is, maybe not. Britney says stuff like "Before or after he beat on me?" and "My dad has a shotgun and he's just waiting to use it.” Radar also claims that they’ve gotten Britney and Jamie Spears’ denials of all of this.

Star cover courtesy of CoverAwards. Additional pics courtesy of Fame.

Tom Cruise keeps stealing Katie Holmes’ makeup

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 08:26 AM PST

This is so shocking! According to the National Enquirer, Tom Cruise is basically like The Portrait of Dorian Gray, only with more Xenu and La Mer. Their sources claim that Tom has been "stealing" all of his wife's expensive face creams, cleansers and "even her makeup!" Oh, Tom. Oh, and he likes to wear a little mascara with his skinny jeans and high heels. Work it, girl.

TOM CRUISE is “so pretty” as he takes drastic measures to defeat age - by raiding KATIE HOLMES stash of beauty and makeup supplies. The 48-year-old star has been double dipping his wife Katie’s beauty and makeup drawers to remain youthful looking.

“Tom is in major midlife crisis mode,” revealed a source. “He’s freaking out over the new lines on his face, the gray hairs on his head and on his face when he shaves. He has started applying Katie’s high-priced facial creams, cleansers and even her makeup - and he loves the results!”

Tom has become a daily user of Katie’s pricey cosmetics, including a face cream that retails for $320. He also uses the same facial masks she uses on a daily basis, say insiders.

“He even slathers on Katie’s foundation before public events and lightly applies her mascara to make his eyelashes look fuller,” revealed the source.

“Tom is incredibly vain, and he’s willing to go to great lengths to look good next to his younger co-stars. Katie is horrified that Tom has resorted to raiding her beauty supplies,” revealed the source.

It’s a real Mission Impossible.

[From The National Enquirer]

Now, I thought Tom had gotten some work done last year (or the year before, I can't remember) when his face started looking magically tighter. I honestly believe Tom has been getting some gradual nips and tucks over the years, so the idea that he's very vain isn't new to me. I would even guess that Tom actually goes out and buys his own skin care stuff, and it's probably really pricey. I doubt that Tom "steals" Katie's stuff. As for the makeup… well… whatever. He's an actor, he wears makeup, it happens. The skinny jeans and the high heels bother me more.

Angelina Jolie’s grey coat porn in Paris: boring or simply professional?

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 07:59 AM PST

Here are new photos of Angelina Jolie in Paris, going into what is probably the first day of her junket for The Tourist. She appears to be wearing a rather beautiful grey coat over a pencil-skirt-and-sweater or a fitted dress. This is actually the best dressed Angelina has been in a while - she's usually okay when she's doing business-casual, as opposed to her grandma styles in formalwear or eveningwear.

Speaking of businesswear - I am perhaps the only person who was really pissed off about Jennifer Garner's recent under-dressed appearance before Congress - the photos we had of her made it appear like she had wandered in to testify in a tank top, with very little makeup or styling (I later found out the tank top was a loose, shapeless shift-dress). I don't begrudge Garner or anyone else their lack of styling in random candid shots, but I'm a big believer in dressing for the occasion, and always being situation-appropriate. When you testify before Congress, or when you appear in court, you should be wearing some kind of suit or professional attire - no jeans, no uncovered arms, no half-assed ponytails. While I have no love for Angelina's style in general, I have to give the bitch credit - she always looks occasion-appropriate. Plus… you know, the coat porn. The bitch has great coats.

And here are some more photos of Angelina's outing yesterday with Shiloh, the Empress and Pax.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

Chelsea Handler on 50 Cent: ‘I call him Curtis when we’re having sex’, ‘he can’t swim’

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 07:53 AM PST

Chelsea Handler was a guest on The Tonight Show last night. She was promoting her E! show and she made a lot of lame jokes, including some about race, as is typical for her. She brought up the fact that she was dating 50 cent by quipping that she would have brought him with her on vacation, only he can’t swim. Here’s part of what she told Jay, thanks to E! You can watch her interview in two parts on Hulu and a segment is above.

On her vacation with Jennifer Aniston
“She was sweet enough to take me on vacation with her. I was trying not to get photographed next to her in a bathing suit, for obvious reasons,” Chelsea said Tuesday on The Tonight Show. “So I did a lot of stuff on my own.”

Like drink?

“It’s not even cute! I was probably trying to bend over and pick up a margarita,” Chelsea lambasted Jay Leno as he insisted upon cutting to a shot of the funnylady’s bikini-clad butt. “You know how I feel about my margaritas, Jay!”

But because she loves beach vacations, it might be a while before she’s ever caught sipping margaritas with 50 Cent.

She brings up 50 Cent without any prompting from Jay
“I can’t bring 50 Cent with me, ’cause he’s not a strong swimmer,” she joked, adding that her friend has not met her family. Because, as she pointed out again, he’s just her friend.

“It’s Fiddy Cent, isn’t it?” Jay asked.

“I don’t know, I call him Curtis when we’re having sex,” Chelsea deadpanned. “No, but he does have a real name. His name is Curtis. Curtis…I don’t know, I should find out.”

Jay also asked Chelsea about her brief relationship with animal expert Dave Salmoni.

“We just did not have anything else to talk about,” she laughed. “No, he’s a really nice guy…It was a short relationship, you know, in and out.”

[From E! Online]

Was it racist to say that 50 is “not a strong swimmer?” She said it and then looked to the audience for laughs, so I do think she meant it as a joke about his race. Then she made another lame joke after the break that she was “looking over at your band and noticed there are hardly any white guys. They must have heard I was coming. Thank you. Oh there you are, hi whitey!”

This woman is not funny, she’s rude and she makes stupid jokes about race all the time. Somehow she still has an E! talk show though, and she’s friends with Jennifer Aniston. What do they say about the company you keep? I hope Jay had her on due to a last minute cancellation.

Jessica Simpson pregnancy rumors heat up after tree-lighting appearance

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 07:23 AM PST

Last night, Jessica Simpson appeared on NBC's coverage of the Rockefeller Center's tree-lighting ceremony. I think Mariah Carey's bit was pre-taped, but Jessica sang live (unless she lip-synced, always a possibility). Jessica also sang a duet with a young soldier… and she tried to diva him, even though I think the kid had a better voice:

I had forgotten how dumb Jessica looks when she sings. She makes the stupidest faces. Speaking of dumb, the pregnancy rumors keep on coming, despite Jessica’s denials. I didn't think she looked particularly pregnant for last night's appearance - at least, not any more than she has looked lately. Life & Style has the pregnancy rumors on their cover this week:

Jessica Simpson has a lot to be thankful for this year. So on Nov. 24, the day before Thanksgiving, Jessica and her fiancé, Eric Johnson, brought their parents and close friends together for a celebratory evening at Coppola's Italian restaurant in NYC, and Life & Style has all the details.

Toasting the couple's Nov. 11 engagement with white wine, Jessica quickly charmed her future in-laws with stories of lost earrings and how Eric played doctor while she had the flu.

"She and Eric were very loving — hugging, kissing and whispering in each other's ears," an eyewitness tells Life & Style. "She also showed off her engagement ring. She even took it off at one point and handed it to Eric’s parents to look at." Jessica and the group dined on a feast of grilled eggplant with marinara sauce, short ribs with homemade pappardelle, lobster with rigatoni in lobster sauce, homemade meatballs and sausage.

Though Jess has denied baby rumors, she's already thinking about a newborn in the near future, saying, "I definitely see myself having a family with Eric, so that's exciting to think about!"

And her mother, Tina Simpson, is just as ecstatic about the prospect of more grandkids. "Obviously I'm looking forward to having more grandkids!" Tina, grandma to daughter Ashlee Simpson-Wentz's son, Bronx, told Life & Style after dinner. "Bronx is the love of my life." And whether a boy or girl, she'll be thrilled. "I'll take anything I get," Tina said. "I'm not picky!"

The couple began dating only six short months ago, so it's no surprise that their engagement may be even shorter. An insider tells Life & Style that the bride-to-be will be walking down the aisle very soon. "It won't be before Christmas, but it'll definitely be before spring," reveals the insider. "January or February at the latest. They don't want to waste any time."

[From Life & Style]

So… they're not claiming that babies are actually happening right now, just that Jessica is going to be knocked up at some point in the near future. Good to know!

Cover and additional L&S photo courtesy of Life & Style. Other pic courtesy of WENN.

Jaylor/Jwifty pose for hilarious Us Weekly cover

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 07:09 AM PST

CB prefers to call Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift "Jaylor" but I still think it sounds too much like Gaylord. Jwifty still appeals to me. Anyway, Us Weekly hasn't released their cover story yet, but I'm enjoying the hell out of their cover this week. I mean… it's perfect. What goes on in Jake's publicist's mind? "You know what will solve all of these gay rumors? Endless stories about Jake and a 14 year old going out for maple coffee and ice cream with sprinkles, then sending them out for posed photo ops!" I just can't get over how freaking posed everything in this relationship is. Who do they think they are fooling?

Also - does anyone else think that Gaylord Jwifty is somehow being sponsored by coffee companies? Discuss.

UPDATE: Here’s Us Weekly’s cover story:

The new Us Weekly (now on newsstands) has the first photos of Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal’s romantic Thanksgiving Day weekend.

Arm in arm, the two looked more smitten than ever as they took an afternoon stroll in Brooklyn’s Park Slope neighborhood, where the actor’s sister, Maggie, lives.

Dating for just five weeks, the romance is heating up, several insiders tell Us Weekly.

"She loves his family and he loves hers,” says a Swift source.

Adds another pal, "It's definitely serious."

So, how did the unlikely romance come about?

Find out and get more - including why their relationship works; their thoughts on the nine-year age gap and what their families think; how Swift is already “love-struck” and must-see exclusive photos - in new Us Weekly today!

Oooh, they’re “heating up”! Pretty soon Jake is going to introduce Swifty to his boyfriend.

Cover courtesy of CoverAwards.

Kate Gosselin on The Today Show: ‘This is not abnormal,’ ‘It’s a heaven on earth job’

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 06:24 AM PST

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

A tired wonk-eyed Kate Gosselin was on The Today Show this morning to “set the record straight” about the rumors that her show was canceled and two of her sextuplets were expelled from their private school. She repeated the same claims she’s made in earlier interviews, that her kids weren’t expelled but were having problems in school due to the divorce, and that her show is not canceled. This woman talks in incomplete run on sentences as if she’s trying to cram in every point she’s trying to make simultaneously. She was arrogant and defensive while refuting the rumors and tried to make it sound like everything was normal and under her complete control.

strong>On how she and the kids are doing
It is so great a year later [after the divotce] to feel put back together and more normal and we’re functioning and in a routine. We’re very happy actually.

On Colin and Alexis getting expelled: No, but
That is false, they were not expelled from school. We have a situation where… my kids are in an academically excelling school where academics are pushed and I fully support it combined with kids who are having just gone through a divorce of their parents. Suffering all those normal feelings and the two collided and they just were not doing well with the combination.

On how she has her kids problems under control
They were having anger issues. They were acting out, having behavior things. Things that I felt very alone once I did the research, talked to other moms that have gone through divorces, very normal stuff in that regard. So I did what I could do, we mutually agreed, I brought them home, I have them with a private tutor… she’s teaching them on on one, they are excelling along with weekly therapy… all is well again… The goal is to get them back into school.

On how all her other kids are fine, of course
When you have two kids who are not following the course - all eight of my kids have always followed the same path and this is the first time we’ve kind of had kids who hadn’t… it’s so hard because you’re thinking ‘my gosh, what in the world?’ Then I look at my other six, who are excelling at school and at home, doing everything wonderfully that they should be doing, so they’re amazingly well. No they are not being watched in school, no they are not doing anything other than doing wonderfully. So I mean, I think we have done very well and I knew going through a divorce, you have to watch for stuff. It will happen. This is not abnormal, at all.

Kate also said that she and Jon had no issue with each other over the holiday custody schedule and said “that’s been very peaceful.” She said that when it comes to scheduling time with the kids “I always reach out to him first… and I do it amicably with solutions and the best interests of the kids in mind.” On whether she accepts Jon’s apology, which he tweeted last month, Kate said “I’ve never personally been apologized to… but I have strangely and ironically forgiven him, for the sake of my kids… I don’t really have time to waste sitting around being upset.” See, Kate is in control and of course she’s the wronged, better party.

As for Jon’s complaint that his kids should be off TV, Kate haughtily maintained that “their best interest is what is good for the kids, what they enjoy, what I see on their faces, and there has been nothing but positive that has come out of it. I am working while they’re by my side and traveling and that is not only providing us trips for a lifetime but it’s providing for their future and I am still sitting here honestly telling you Meredith and I believe it wholeheartedly, as does the evidence that you see on TV, that it is in their best interest… we would not be doing it if it wasn’t… it’s a heaven on earth job, it really is.” We’ll see if her kids agree with her when they’re 20-something and are realizing how f’ed up their made-for-TV tabloid childhood really was.

Natalie Portman in Dior at the Black Swan premiere: lovely or surly?

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 05:48 AM PST

Last night was the big gala premiere for Black Swan in New York. I know it seems like there has already been a ton of "premieres" for this particular film, but I think a lot of them were screenings and film festival premieres and such. But last night was a big deal - all of the cast were assembled, and Natalie Portman had her pose-hard bitchface at the ready. Here's a question, for all of us out here in the cheap seats: Why is Natalie looking so crabby and bitchy during this film's promotion? She's considered one of the leading candidates for the Best Actress Oscar, and she will likely be the centerpiece of a larger Black Swan Oscar push. Why look so "over it" and nasty? Anyway, Natalie and her bitchface were in Dior, a cosponsor for the premiere. One thing I'll give her - the bitch can wear the hell out of some red lipstick. Right?

Meanwhile, I guess Mila Kunis got a memo that only the "star" of the film could wear Dior, because she donned a lovely cream Elie Saab. I really like this dress - in fact, I'm pretty much in love with Mila's whole wardrobe throughout the Black Swan promotional tour. Where Natalie looks surly, uncomfortable and at times occasion-inappropriate, Mila has been nailing every look and every occasion.

And of course, my Vincent Cassel. His face is just so beautiful (to me).

Winona Ryder in all-black. I'm surprised she didn't go with another strapless, tutu-esque gown. I give her points for wearing a suit. But she's giving me a really hardcore goth flashback from my youth.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Jim Carrey says Ewan McGregor is “a great kisser” & “a dream come true”

Posted: 01 Dec 2010 05:18 AM PST

Back in 2008, Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor made a film called I Love You Phillip Morris, all about two men who fall in love in prison. It's supposed to be a comedy-drama, and it never sounded like the some kind of super-Oscar bait, nor like a crowd-pleasing mindless popcorn film. But it's didn't really sound bad, either. So it's slightly surprising to me that it's taken until now to get a release date - it was in distribution purgatory after concerns were raised over the raunchiness of some of the (gay) sex scenes between Ewan and Jim. Also surprising - Jim and Ewan are both standing by this project, and they both really seem to like each other. Strange bedfellows…

Anyway, the film comes out this Friday, in limited release. Jim Carrey sat down with Parade Magazine to promote the release, at long last- although it sounds a lot like past interviews. Jim has said the line about kissing Ewan before:

Jim Carrey takes it to the limit and beyond in the very R-rated I Love You Phillip Morris, loosely based on the life of convicted Texas con man and four-time prison escapee Steven Russell. He ends up having a mad affair behind bars with another prisoner played by Ewan McGregor.

Carrey tells Parade’s Jeanne Wolf what attracted him to the most off-beat role of his career and his long-term goal of helping to make the world a better place.

It’s all about love.
“There are very few scripts that I would come across that I would pay to do and this was one of them. I didn’t mind taking a big salary cut. I’m here to do extreme and interesting things. I liked the guy I played and I hated him. But the one thing that always stayed with me was the idea that he was relentless about love, and all of us understand that. I’m a desperate man myself.”

As for locking lips with Ewan McGregor, who plays his lover.
“A dream come true. I mean, look at the guy. I have to say, he is a great kisser. As Ewan said, ‘When you’re kissing another guy it can get a little prickly.’ Actually, you had to put out of your mind your own sexual preference and just try to understand that you were loving another person who just happens to be a guy. It wasn’t about male or female, love is love.”

What he had in common with his character.
“He had blind faith in himself. I have that. I have that belief that I can do probably more than I’m qualified to do. The guy I play definitely has no limits. The things he was able to finagle his way into are just shocking and amazing. You can’t help admire that quality in people. That’s why we love con artist movies.”

What’s driving him?
“There’s always some sort of deep undercurrent running under things for me. I’ve had peaks of kind of enlightenment where I felt like, ‘Oh, wow. I’ve got to figure it out. This is it. OK. I have peace. I have bliss.’ And, then, boom, off the wave into the surf, and you’re struggling again. I definitely have those scared to death moments, but they’re what make you interesting.”,

And who needs an agent when you have the man upstairs.
“What’s important to me is the long haul. It’s a strange thing, but sometimes I think that God is somehow fashioning my life so that I do stay interested and stay hungry.”

[From Parade]

Beyond the stuff about the film, how does Jim sound to you? I still worry about him. I worry that he's not taking his meds, and that his "peaks of enlightenment" are some kind of manic-depressive high. That being said, Jim sounds like he's in a pretty good place right now, so God bless. I hope someone goes to see this film. Apparently, Ewan goes down on Jim on camera.

Here's an interesting photo of Jim, Ewan and… Ewan's date for this particular night, Melanie Laurent, his alleged mistress. Interesting.