Thursday, October 20, 2011

Crushable

Crushable


Gallery: 7 Shirtless Photos Of Rihanna’s New Star Dudley O’Shaughnessy

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 11:13 AM PDT


We’re still totally feeling Dudley O’Shaughnessy, the pouty-lipped, insanely-cheekboned London lover from Rihanna‘s “We Fell in Love” video. He’s just too pretty to be real! Last week, we relayed five facts about the English model and boxer, and now we’re back with seven photos of this beautiful creature — sans shirt, of course.

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This Sweded Trailer Of The Avengers Is Amazing

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 11:11 AM PDT

Sweding: To recreate a movie in the most low-budget but loving and respectful way. In Be Kind Rewind, Jack Black tells customers that these popular homages take longer to arrive and cost more because they’re from Sweden.

And apparently sweding is not just a joke from a Michel Gondry movie, but a pastime with actual championships! SwedeFest, a festival which takes place in Fresno, CA, just tweeted the link to a sweded Avengers trailer. And wow, it’s a lot of fun.

The toy-car explosions, dog cameo, and range of really accurate to half-assed costumes… You can tell these are real geeks who loved The Avengers trailer so much that they felt compelled to recreate it. And now I’m actually more excited for the movie.

Hey, all aspiring sweders—you’ve actually got til November 1 to submit your own passion project. So get to it!

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Is This Superfan Tribute To Ashton Kutcher The World’s Most Terrifying Tattoo?

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 10:19 AM PDT

I think Ashton Kutcher‘s very handsome. I had a crush on him when he was in That 70s Show and I think he’s actually doing a decent job on Two and a Half Men. However, I’m a rational human who funny understands that Ashton Kutcher — whom I have never met — does not reciprocate any of those feelings. Some woman named Jennifer, though? Her love for AK has gotten a bit delusional.

Evidently, Jennifer has been tweeting that she’s Ashton’s number-one fan for a while now, and she recently released an image of her new back tattoo into the wild. Her tattoo appears to say, “Ashton Kutcher i love you love is forever fan love you.” Which is Elvish for, “I am totally sane and not at all going to commit criminal activity.”

(via MediaTakeOut)

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Patrick Swayze’s Widow Recreates Dirty Dancing Scene…With His Wax Figure

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 10:10 AM PDT

Dear UsMagazine: You’ve got to be clearer when you say that Patrick Swayze‘s widow Lisa Niemi “recreates sexy scene from Dirty Dancing with his Madame Tussauds wax figure, because my mind went to a couple of places.

1) Crawling on the floor toward each other, which would challenge both parties with their limited flexibility.

2) The awesome lift at the end.

3) The sex scene. (Yeah, I didn’t want to be thinking about it, but this is what happens when you’re too vague!)

It turns out it was none of these. Instead, Lisa posed the statue up on a log and stood with him, because apparently there’s a scene in the movie where Johnny and Baby (Jennifer Grey) stand on a log and he seduces her? I don’t remember it from my childhood viewings, but obviously I was distracted.

All joking aside, we have to agree with Lisa that it’s incredibly bittersweet to see this. She lost Patrick — her husband of 34 years – when he died in 2009 of pancreatic cancer. He was just 57, but now Lisa will be able to always envision him at the peak of his career.

She tells Us how impressed she is with Madam Tussauds’ work:

“He had this kind of mischievous, but confident loo … and things like his core [were] very, very strong and they worked on his arms more, so it’s very detailed. There’s a lot of work that goes into this.”

However, the last thing she said was, “I wish he were here, really here.” (Yeah, I teared up a little reading that.) You would think that actors’ widow(er)s would be glad that their beloved is immortalized on-screen and in photographs; this way they have countless mementos of the person who passed. But obviously not even the most accurate film or statue would ever match the real thing.

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Am I Right Ladies? Advertising The End Of Marriage

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 09:36 AM PDT

The votes are in, and once again I'm not one of People's 50 Most Beautiful People. Maybe next year, amirightladies? I'M KIDDING. But seriously, next year? No, but actually seriously, the people have voted and Consumerist has tallied the votes for this year's Worst Ad in America. Now usually the only time I talk about Consumerist is when I'm referencing myself. As in I'm a consumerist of junk food. Really I'm more of a ravenous-ist but who's counting? I'm not (if we're talking about calories).

While it's fun to hate, I say let's give these ads some appreci-hate. The biggest takeaway I found in this year's crop of worst ads is that committed relationships are terrible and will ruin your life. If you spend as much time wanting a husband as I do, it's a devastating fact to confront at first. But then when I thought about it, what these ads were really saying is that being single is the best! That's right, ladies, Big Advertising is sending us a message. We are all better off single.

Take, for example, the runner-up for Worst Ad in America.

Ladies, ladies, ladies. Who knew being married turned you into the worst person in the world? The Ad Boys on the AT&T account did, that's who. My mama never told me the only place marriage got you was in a greenhouse filled with bitter regrets. She also never told me who my real father was. Either way, this commercial is scary enough to keep smart women out of long-term relationships. B+

In the category of Groups That Ought To Go Their Separate Ways, we have the Trojan Triphoria Bridal Shower Girls. Those Ad Boys on the Trojan account recognized the impending doom marriage spells for women. But they knew all women really want to get married and that's all women want out of life, so they offered a solution:

Sex with the same man for the rest of your life? P-U! Hell, I'm just trying to have sex with the same man two nights in a row, but who's counting? (I am. Unless we're still talking about calories, then I'm not.)

But look at how happy that woman's husband was to suddenly have all the pressure of having to pleasure his new wife lifted off his shoulders. In this man vs. the machine, man happily cedes victory. Wife gets triple the pleasure, man gets triple the football. My only real beef with this commercial is the fact that her friends' blown-back hair clearly indicates they used the tri-phoria before giving it to her. Gross. Not realistic. But otherwise, A-

And the winner for Trend That Needs to Stop Being a Trend (drumroll please)… Men Barely Tolerating Their Wives. That's right, girls. As soon as you commit to love and cherish them forever, men commit to hating you for all eternity. That's what the Klondike Ad Boys are trying to tell you in this unfairly much-maligned ad. It's a warning:

Even five seconds is too long for the supposed love of your life to bear the sound of your voice. While the mint chocolate chip Klondike bar is amazing—I had two already for breakfast—it's a sad state of affairs when your husband can only be compelled to listen to you for the reward of one frozen treat. Presented to him by hot chicks.

Read the chocolate writing on the walls, womyn. Klondike thinks you're better off alone. I for one say thank you, Klondike, for warning me before it was too late. And for making a damn good ice cream bar. A+

These ads may be some of the worst in America this year, but today I think we made the best of them. And at the end of the day that's what advertising dollars are all about. But who's counting? They are (I'm still not counting calories).

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The Daily WTF: Man Gets Sent Bed-Sized Slipper

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 09:17 AM PDT



Tom Boddingham
has two differently sized feet. His left foot is a size-and-a-half larger than his right. So when he went online to order himself a pair of monster foot slippers (because: why not?), he requested a size-13 shoe and a size-14.5 shoe. He was sent a size-13 shoe and a size 145 shoe. Evidently, the Chinese monster slipper manufacturers skipped over the decimal point, assuming the giant shoe was for a display.

Which still doesn’t make sense, right? Why would someone order one giant display shoe and one regular-sized show? The plus side is, Tom now has this really awesome monster foot bed, which I very much hope he keeps forever.

(via Geekologie)

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Video: Liveblogging Rihanna’s Mildly Insane ‘We Found Love’ Video

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 10:50 AM PDT

Rihanna‘s new video for “We Found Love” is pretty insane for something that will get played a dillion times on MTV. Here are my reactions to it IN REAL TIME.

0:18: Why is Rihanna speaking with a Cockney accent? Are they supposed to be in London?

0:38: HOLY GOD that is an attractive man. Look at those eyes. A girl could drown in them.

0:54: People are saying he looks like Chris Brown, and maybe he does a little, but I’m sorry, Chris Brown is not that hot.

1:00: Skating! Red smoke bombs! Making out! I like where this is going.

1:13: Rihanna has the nicest smile. Reminds me a bit of Mariah Carey in her heyday, only with more computers.

1:15: Is this song just going to be the same annoying melody, over and over again, with an ever more frantic club beat behind it? (UPDATE: Yes.)

1:55: Holy drug montage, Rihanna. I’m guessing some of this is going to get censored out by MTV. Good job being edgy!

2:04: Oh, I get it. Their love is like drugs. Where have I heard that one before? In fairness, I’d probably be addicted to this Dudley character too, if he were my boo. (Only a man who looks like that could pull off the name “Dudley.”)

2:06: Why is she wearing the American flag on her vest? I thought they were supposed to be in England? (I know they filmed it in Ireland, but maybe they used that tried and true film technique, “Ireland for England”?) And what’s the DJ plugging his decks into? They are in a field in the middle of nowhere.

2:21: Okay, their petty shoplifting definitely seems like a reference to looting. They are totes in England.

2:55: Eek, they’re fighting in a car. Do you think it’s hard for Rihanna to watch that part?

3:12: Holy shit that’s a lot of cigarettes at once. DO YOU HAVE A DEATH WISH, DUDLEY?

3:20: Q: Is it sexy to blow smoke into one another’s mouths? A: Sure, if that smoke is going to get you high and/or you look like that.

3:30: Destruction is projected on Rihanna’s ass. This is meant to symbolize her ass’s DARK SIDE. Like, I know it’s a wonderful ass, but mess with it too hard and you will be demolished quicker than that building.

3:45: You cannot claim Rihanna’s ass as “MINE” you fool. What did I just get done telling you?

3:52: Yay, another wacky drug montage! This shot is awesome:

3:58: And here they are, right back where they began, in the bathtub with their clothes on, just kind of glaring heartbrokenly at one another. You forgot the getting naked part.

4:04: OMG SHE’S PUKING RIBBONS WTF LOL THIS IS SO COOL!

4:15: He’s all drugged up and she’s putting things in a bag and leaving him. Do it, girl!

4:20: Something about the way he clutches at her ankle and she hits him with her bag is incredibly comical to me. Q: Does that mean I’m dead inside? A: Perhaps.

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The Paranormal Activity 3 Audience Reaction Videos Don’t Have Us Too Excited To See The Movie

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 08:48 AM PDT

Why is it that the official videos that Paramount released of fan reactions to Paranormal Activity 3 are only so-so, while ScreenRant has an excellent clip from inside the theater? It’s sort of a weird way to market the movie.

The studio’s video shows people after their enthusiasm has dissipated and rational thought has returned. I had the same reaction after seeing the first Paranormal Activity: The moment I left the theater, I was suddenly fine. And that’s when I knew that I wouldn’t like the franchise the same way I do the Saw movies, or even the movie that my roommate had me watch when we got home that night, The Orphanage.


In contrast, you have ScreenRant and other outlets posting videos to YouTube like this one:

Now this is what we like to see with a horror movie! No thoughtful commentary after the fact: Show us everyone all Blair Witch/night-vision-style and let us see their every whimper and scream. (The guy who literally has to catch his breath is hilarious, right?) Of course, it could be that the studio released these in-the-theater videos to various outlets and is doing a two-pronged marketing scheme. Which would be pretty smart.

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Gallery: People Dressed Up As Brad Pitt And Angelina Jolie For Halloween

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 08:47 AM PDT

Earlier this week we spotlighted the trend of regular folks dressing up like Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen. But the pint-sized twins are hardly the most popular celeb do to pay homage to on Halloween — that honor might go to Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. This look tends to be all about lips, tattoos, and lots of kids. Weirdly, there’s nary an Oscar is sight.

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Gallery: 7 Creepy But Charismatic Movie Villains

Posted: 20 Oct 2011 08:34 AM PDT

Martha Marcy May Marlene, Elizabeth Olsen‘s new film where she plays a young woman who escapes a cult, horrified me in the best way. Every performance is riveting, including John Hawkes, who plays the seemingly sensitive and caring leader Patrick. But even as he got more and more wrong and brainwashed all his impressionable young followers, I couldn’t help finding him sexy. “In a rugged, Bruce Springsteen kind of way, ” I tried to explain to my boyfriend, but he wasn’t convinced.

What is it about these characters where we know they’d hunt us down if we tried to escape, but we’re still drawn to join them in the first place?

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