Saturday, October 15, 2011

Crushable

Crushable


Teen Mom Jenelle Evans Has a New Website, Boyfriend, House. Has She Finally Gone Straight?

Posted: 15 Oct 2011 10:19 AM PDT

Can it be true? Is troubled Teen Mom Jenelle Evans finally straightening herself out? Maybe! Let’s spend a minute or two catching up with Jenelle, shall we?

Let's start small: Jenelle is getting a website up and running. There's nothing on it yet, but it's called jenelleandjace.com, so presumably she's gearing it towards adventures in parenting. Once she gets custody of Jace back from her mother Barbara, that is.

If she keeps going on the track she's on right now, though, getting Jace back might not be as impossible as it hitherto has seemed: Her attorney, Dustin Sullivan, told Radar Online not too long ago that Jenelle is "doing really well. She is getting drug tested once a week and has passed every single test for the last two and a half months." Unexpected? Perhaps. Good? Definitely.

And then there's the new boyfriend. At the end of September, Jenelle tweeted this picture of the two them, along with the encouraging words, "Preview of my new man. He is simply amazing to me!":

So, is this another Kieffer Delp? Doesn't look it, interestingly. Starcasm did a little digging and found out that his name is Josh and that he– prepare yourselves– HAS A JOB. Let me say that again, just because it's so unreal: JENELLE'S BOYFRIEND HAS A JOB. Apparently Josh works in pest control, where his duties usually involve taking down and rebuilding walls. Carpentry ain't nothin' to sneeze at, so good for him.

And last but certainly not least, guess what? Jenelle has moved out of her mom's house– which, granted, she does a lot– but the difference this time is that she's not just crashing on someone's couch until they kick her out. Remember Jenelle's friend Amber? It's okay if you don't; we haven't seen much of her since Jenelle's 16 & Pregnant episode. But Amber and Jenelle have rented a house together not far from Barbara's place, and you know what? It looks pretty nice! Check it out, courtesy of Starcasm.

Here’s the exterior:

Cute, right?

And here’s the living room:

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Video: Do You Want to Know What the New Muppet Movie Is Actually About?

Posted: 15 Oct 2011 08:45 AM PDT

Sure, the trailers that have been released for the new Muppet movie thus far have been pretty amazing– Green Lantern parody? The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo spoof? I’ll take ‘em!– but you know the one thing that they HAVEN’T really done all that well yet? They haven’t really told us what the movie is actually going to be ABOUT.

But, hey guess what? There’s a new trailer out! And it actually deals with the plot of the movie! Let’s take a look, shall we?

So as best as I can tell, Amy Adams and Jason Segel are the Muppets’ biggest fans. They’ve planned a big trip to L.A. specifically to go crash Muppet Studios. They also appear to have a Muppet of some kind with them– his name, it appears, is Walter– though it is unclear whether they found him at Muppet Studios or whether he’s a lone Muppet that they befriended earlier and brought with them. And then, when they finally GET to Muppet Studios, something magical happens: Kermit appears! Hoorah! But the Muppets, you see, need Amy and Jason’s help. They want to get back into show business– but the problem is, they’re not famous anymore. What to do? Why, build your way back to the top, of course! Backstage farce? Feel-good, life-affirming drama? Who knows. But there will be chickens. There will be explosions. There will be amazing, unexpected cameos. And I CAN’T WAIT.

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10 Awesomely Inappropriate Children’s Books

Posted: 15 Oct 2011 07:14 AM PDT

“Awesome” in this case might be in the traditional, “I am full of awe” sense, OR in the new-fangled “OMG, that’s sooooo awesome!” sense. Both are applicable. Because a) I can’t believe some of these children’s books exist, and b) I’m thrilled by the fact that they DO exist. They say it’s best to start kids reading young, and what better way than with, say, Go the F*** to Sleep?

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Parting Tweet: Ken Marino Does NOT Care For Aioli

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 03:35 PM PDT

Party Down actor Ken Marino does not care for aioli. No way, no how. Ken thinks aioli is just a fancy way of saying “mayonnaise,” and he is extremely dedicated to his campaign.

How dedicated? The tweets above are by no means the entirety of Ken’s anti-aioli rant. That, you can see over here — but be warned, what you’re going to witness is a man seemingly about to break.

So, can we stop this whole “aioli and mayonnaise are the same thing” charade? Or at least get a Facebook group dedicated to it?

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Reality TV Still Sets Its Plus-Size Female Stars Apart From Regular Programming, But At Least It’s Nice To Them

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 03:03 PM PDT

I was really impressed with MTV‘s new reality show Chelsea Settles. At first, it sounded like a joke: A 324-pound woman who moves to LA to fulfill her dreams of working in the fashion industry. Even the title seemed mocking, though that’s actually Chelsea Settles‘ name.

But our new heroine is warm and compelling; and more importantly, MTV doesn’t mock her. The editors could have turned the show into parody, but (judging from the pilot, at least) they take Chelsea as seriously as she wants the rest of the world to take her.

Basically, Chelsea seems to be in on the joke. In the first few minutes, after saying that Kim Kardashian is her hero, she deadpans, “I think it’s obvious what my number-one passion is.” Then the camera cuts to her ordering food at a Chik-Fil-A. The way she pulls over into an empty parking lot to eat her food is almost identical to the True Life episodes where bingers shamefully eat food while the cameras look on impassively.

Chelsea admits that she struggles with food addiction; the desire to end that reliance and lose weight are two big issues the show will portray. Her show is a combination of every subject that MTV’s current roster covers.

But for the most part, the network seems to treat her with nothing but respect. The first fifteen seconds of the pilot were leery; they held off on showing us Chelsea, first just the back of her head as the producers around her fiddled with microphones and warm-up questions. Was this to make the shock of seeing a fat girl even more intense? I’m not sure, but even so it’s the worst that gets thrown at her.

It turns out that the title is meant to be taken literally, but only as a description of Chelsea’s past: She’s been so run down by the world that she’s been willing to settle for a life consumed by others’ needs—her mother’s health, her boyfriend Rory cheating on her because she won’t move to his army base.

I’m still a little worried about tonight’s Say Yes to the Dress: The Big Day on TLC. The official synopsis on IMDb seems a bit too aware of how easy it is to make puns about an important event in a plus-sized woman’s life:

When we first met Kelly in the series premiere of Say Yes to the Dress: Big Bliss, she was a bride-to-be looking for her perfect dress. Now, this one-hour special will share her larger than life wedding to the man of her dreams.

Really, you had to describe her wedding as “larger-than-life”? Kelly Miller was on the very first episode of SYTTD‘s spin-off; when it premiered a year ago, Blisstree asked why we even needed to separate average-sized and plus-sized women into separate shows.

For research, I watched Kelly’s episode, “Big Love.” The detail that immediately jumped out at me, that separates Big Bliss from its sister show, is that the three women profiled in the pilot all have their fiances with them. The implication is that they’re not secure enough about their bodies and what looks good on them that they need the extra support. But the men don’t seem heartbroken that they’re breaking a wedding tradition; if anything, it’s the total opposite. They’re delighted to help their women pick out things, and they actually get emotional at any dress, but especially the ones that the ladies choose.

The issue of whether the show exploits the women’s size is very push-and-pull. Honestly, Kelly draws more attention to her size than the show ever does. Her brashness and willingness to put the fat issue out there before anyone else made her a fan favorite, which is likely why SYTTD chose to feature her in their first hour-long special.

But then you have Amy, who struggles to step into the largest sample size and it rips. However, the producers decide to amplify the rip so it sounds as loud as that scratching-record effect you hear in movies. Amy’s panicked “I’m sorry!” just about broke my heart.

Similar to Chelsea Settles, a big theme of Big Bliss is brides saying, “I will not settle!”—they found men who will accept them, and they’re not going to settle for what Kelly calls “fat-girl dresses.”

The Big Day follows Kelly down the aisle a year after she got her dream dress. I’m really hoping that TLC doesn’t do her a disservice by mocking anything about her size. If her train rips, they better not amplify the sound! According to Zap2It, there was a rain forecast on Kelly’s wedding day, so I’m sure the network will play up that angst. But then at least they’d be treating her like every other nervous bride.

I still think (and know, in Kelly’s case) that the networks feel like they have to set apart shows for the plus-sized market, and that sucks. But they’re not as cruel as I expected them to be. It’s a small victory, but a notable one.

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Here Are Some Photos From Inside The American Apparel Factory

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 02:23 PM PDT

Ah, the American Apparel factory — mythic place where stick-thin girls with hungry eyes and hollow cheekbones are produced en mass. Or so we thought. A photographer named Shannon Skloss was allowed into the factory to snap some photos, and it turns out the place is a little more regular-factory-like than we’d anticipated. Here are some of the pics, courtesy of Jezebel.

This photo was labeled “aa_model_ass.”

Fun cocaine!

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The 10 Best New York Comic Con Panels For Crushable Readers

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 02:16 PM PDT

Here at Crushable, our capacity for geekiness is limited—we love Internet memes and Game of Thrones, but we don’t write about the bread-and-butter of geekdom (comics, sci-fi) as much as other sites. But we can’t ignore something so huge as New York Comic Con happening in our backyard! For better or for worse (depending who you ask), NYCC has grown to include more mainstream movies, TV, and celebrities, so we’ve compiled 10 panels that we think you guys would like.

Since I’m getting this out at the end of the day, some of these may have already passed. But really, this post is also for everyone who can’t make it to NYC but, based on these panels, might want to make plans for next October.

Once Upon A Time Exclusive Screening and Panel - Calling all Lost fans – join creators and executive producers Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz (Lost and Tron: Legacy) as well as Erin Felentzer as they introduce you to the magical story of two parallel worlds: one in a distant fairytale land, the other in a present-day reality. Following the exclusive screening of the pilot, Eddy and Adam will participate in a Q&A panel moderated by Matt Mitovich, Editor-at-Large for TVLine.com, about this modern fairytale turned on its head. Arrive early for exclusive magic mirrors!

This is the show you’ve seen posters for: Fairy tales in modern day, starring Ginnifer Goodwin and Jennifer Morrison. Although the pilot is screening first at NYCC, the show premieres on Sunday, October 23.

Is The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo A Superhero? - The heroine of Stieg Larsson's Millennium trilogy has "powers" that seem at times superhuman: she may not fly, but she's an awesome cyberhacker, she's got a photographic memory, and she's tough mentally and physically. Should she be considered a superhero? Join long-time comic book writers and editors Tom DeFalco (Marvel), Danny Fingeroth (Marvel, Superman on the Couch), Paul Levitz (DC) , and Denny O'Neil (DC, Marvel), and psychologist Robin Rosenberg (Psychology of Superheroes, Psychology of the Girl With the Dragon Tattoo) as they discuss what makes a superhero and whether Lisbeth Salander should be considered one. Get a jump on these issues before the American film is released in December.

This is a question that director David Fincher has already grappled with, but it’ll be fun to hear comics professionals hash out the debate. Because having seen the Swedish films — plus the trailer for the American version with Rooney Mara — Lisbeth is pretty unbelievable, in the way that we all wish we were as badass as her.

Celebrity Ghost Stories: Fact, Fiction and Previously Untold Tales in Paranormal Pop Culture - The tabloids frequently publish stories of celebrities encountering ghosts in haunted houses or on the set of movies, but rarely do the celebrities themselves speak out. Based on his extensive experience interviewing them, national pop culture expert Aaron Sagers reveals their haunted stories – as told by the celebrities! There’s no “as told by a friend” here. Instead, in this multimedia presentation, listen to revealing tales from: Nicolas Cage, Dan Aykroyd, Dave Grohl, Ke$ha, Ace Frehley, Mike Mignola and many more!

Ghost stories are always much cooler when they come from someone whose authority you trust, or at least you know from movies. And who wants to bet that Ke$ha’s experience was fucked up?

Star Wars Trivia Contest - Come and compete for great Star Wars prizes in New York Comic Con’s Star Wars Trivia Contest. This last person standing contest is open to all and will be hosted by Star Wars artist Kevin Liell. So brush-up on your Star Wars knowledge and get ready for the biggest trivia contest in the Galaxy!

Star Wars is one of the geek series that we unashamedly cover. Too bad we couldn’t make it to this one in-person—we would’ve kicked ass.

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Video: HEART2HEART’s ‘Facebook Official’ Is A Confusing Combination Of Troll-ish And Sincere

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 02:47 PM PDT

There’s a new music video from Lance Bass-mentored boy band HEART2HEART that is currently making its way around the Internet. This video contains a puzzling mixture of hater-baiting memes and sincerity the likes of which I’ve never seen before, and that’s saying something. Check out their ridiculous hair, intentional copying of N’Sync‘s c. 2000 video for “Bye Bye Bye,” and incredibly dumb lyrics about Facebook! And speaking of that infamous social networking site, as The Village Voice‘s Maura Johnston pointed out, their Facebook page seems like an overblown parody of the kind of presentation we’ve come to associate with mid-nineties issues of Tiger Beat. In addition to each member’s birth name, fake boy band name, height, weight, and “role” (which for lead vocalist Nico includes “youngest”(!)), there’s a hilarious explanation of what the name “HEART2HEART” means:

Their group name stands for the connection they would like to have with their fans across the world.

Good one, guys! What a funny meme you have created! I am laughing so hard I can barely move. Except I also have the lingering suspicion that maybe it’s…not supposed to be a joke? I mean, the group has some real money behind it, as well as the blessing/help of Lance Bass. It seems like Bass is attempting to harness the pageview-grabbing powers of obnoxiousness/mockability as just another promotional tool in the rising boy band’s arsenal. You could say we’ve seen this before with artists like Kreayshawn and Tyler the Creator (I am not counting Rebecca Black as a real artist, but she certainly has that quality in spades as well), but their obnoxiousness seems much more lived in and organic. Like, I believe that they are genuinely obnoxious people who are genuinely into obnoxious things. The obnoxiousness of this hand-selected and packaged boy band, on the other hand, seems much more calculated.

Is it going to work? Will any girls take HEART2HEART seriously enough to put posters of them up in their lockers? Will their next step be to confront all the “haters” they’ve intentionally created? IS THIS THE FUTURE OF MUSIC? I don’t think so! But even the tiny possibility that it might be is making me want to go lie down for a while.

(Via Sound of the City)

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Nicki Minaj’s W Magazine Shoot Sure Is Weird

Posted: 14 Oct 2011 01:34 PM PDT


Nicki Minaj covers November’s issue of W Magazine, which just so happens to be dedicated to art and fashion. An artist named Francesco Vezzoli decked the pop singer out to look like the women of Renaissance portraits — with a bit of a Minaj-branded twist, of course.

Said Minaj-branded twist happens to be some sort of bloody-tear-locket? thing. Here’s what Francesco said about working with Nicki:

“I wanted to play with the public image of a female hip-hop star. During my entire career, I have always been fascinated by powerful women in history. I have spent a lot of time researching the ways they were represented in art and how their images were used to mold the public imagination—and to convey aesthetic and philosophical ideas about beauty and sexual desire. My main interest has been to link the historical artistic approach to female representation to contemporary icons of the media era.”

Here’s another photo from the shoot:

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