Saturday, October 1, 2011

Crushable

Crushable

15 Unexpected Places to Find Darth Vader

Posted: 01 Oct 2011 11:45 AM PDT

It’s true: Darth Vader spends a lot of time hanging out on the Death Star, killing minions, destroying planets, and generally causing mayhem. But ever so often, even the Sith Lord needs to get out of the house and have a change of scenery. Where is he likely to go? Well, you may not think it, but sometimes, you’ll find him in these places…

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Video Gallery: Happy Birthday, Julie Andrews! Here Are Some Songs For You

Posted: 01 Oct 2011 10:20 AM PDT

Guess what, gang? It's Julie Andrews' birthday today! The spectacular star of stage and screen is 76 today, and I've got to tell you, I can only hope that I look (and sound!) that great when I hit the big 7-6. So on this most glorious of days, we'd like to offer you a musical journey through the life and career of the inimitable Julie. Ready to sing along? Here we go!

Cinderella (1957)
Did you know that Rodgers and Hammerstein's Cinderella was originally written for television? Neither did I, but apparently it was! Produced in 1957 as a vehicle for the 22-year-old Julie Andrews, it became an instant classic. If you're a 20-something like me, you might remember the 1967 version with Lesley Ann Warren or the 1997 version with Brandy better, but there's nothing like the original—especially when it comes to "Impossible," charmingly sung as a duet between Julie as Cinderella and Edith Adams as the Fairy Godmother.

Mary Poppins (1964)
I was equal parts horrified and fascinated by Mary Poppins as a kid. On the one hand, it was sort of fascinating to watch Jane and Michael's toys zoom around the room; but on the other, it looked suspiciously like Mary Poppins was actually siccing the toys on the kids. Maybe that's why Scary Mary struck such a chord with me later on. Anyway, a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down, so bottoms up!

The Sound of Music (1965)
How do you solve a problem like Maria? With Julie Andrews, of course! Julie teamed up with Rodgers and Hammerstein again when she starred in the film adaptation of The Sound of Music in 1965. Oddly enough, I always think that I hate The Sound of Music– until I hear "My Favorite Things." That song does it to me every time.

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Hazing Week: Crushable’s Hazing Protection Kit

Posted: 01 Oct 2011 08:45 AM PDT

Here at Crushable, we like to make sure that you, our loyal readers, are prepared for anything. We walked you through what you should take with you in the event of camping; now, we’ve got a new guide for you: A Hazing Protection Kit. We cover multiple forms of hazing here, so no matter what the situation, you should be able to find something to help protect you. Good luck.

1) Haze Machine
A haze machine can create an effective form of camouflage. Just be warned: they’re heavy and somewhat unwieldy, making them difficult to transport. We suggest gathering intel on a specific location, then putting the machine in place before the beginning of any potential skirmish.

Chauvet Arena Hazer 3 (Guitar Center, $799)

2) Mickey Mouse Poncho
Guards against hoses, food, mud, booze, and all sorts of other horrible things that may be thrown at you. Also, who doesn’t love Mickey?

Disney Mickey Mouse Adult Rain Poncho (Amazon, $8.75)

3) Pepto Bismol
To be used in the event that you are made to consume something your system may have trouble processing.

16 oz. Bottle (Drugstore.com, $7.49)

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Video: Who Would Win In A Fight, Elijah Wood or Dominic Monaghan?

Posted: 01 Oct 2011 07:15 AM PDT

Last week, this video appeared on the Interwebs. In it, Elijah Wood challenges fellow Hobbit Dominic Monaghan to a fight. It’s… perplexing. Here, take a look for yourselves:

Honestly, I saw this and… wasn’t quite sure what to do with it. What is going on here? Why does Elijah want to fight Dominic? They seemed to get along all right while they were filming The Lord of the Rings. So what the hell happened? It falls under the heading “What is this I don’t even.” Amirite? Elijah looks to be either drunk or stoned; but then again, maybe he’s not. Maybe this is just his natural state. Maybe he’s done an excellent job fooling all of us into thinking he’s simply a nice young man with impossibly blue eyes for all these years. I don’t know.

But then this happened, and it all started to make sense:

Okay, I lied. It doesn’t make any more sense than it did. All I know is that it features Elijah and Dominic debating the finer points of World of Warcraft versus The Legend of Zelda, followed by the two of them flailing around at each other with boxing gloves. I’m still baffled, but Dominic ends up being the clear winner, so I guess that’s okay, then.

From what I gather, this is all part of some publicity stunt for a documentary about Irish bare-knuckle boxing called Knuckle. Cool? I guess? I don’t know. i’m still confused. What do you guys think?

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Parting Tweet: Courtney Stodden’s Alliteration Strikes Again

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 03:35 PM PDT

I love Courtney Stodden so much! She’s such a gem of a human being. A real, shining American treasure. Especially when she uses alliteration.

Courtney, I propose a Twitter challenge: Start with “A” and go through the alphabet, writing one alliterative sexual tweet a day. That’s the premise of your reality show, lady.

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Hazing Week: Not All Celebrities Understand What Real Bullying Is

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 03:45 PM PDT

Bullying is one of the most popular topics for celebrities right now. With the terrible stories of cyberbullying and teens taking their own lives, it seems there’s an endless opportunity for celebs to step forward and offer up comfort. In fact, many of them were bullied themselves!

Bullying is an easy issue to rally against. But why do celebrities need to make it all about them?

Proving people wrong isn’t the only reason that people want to become famous, but it’s certainly a great perk. That might be a reason why many people dream of making it in Hollywood, whether it’s as a romantic lead or that screeching bitch on a reality show.

Maybe that’s why so many A-listers predictably step forward to announce their traumatic pasts. The most recent article on this topic ran a little over three weeks ago, when Yahoo listed various hearthrobs who were bullied as children. And most of them just come off as orchestrated PR opportunities more than genuine confessions.

The thing is, a lot of the accounts are similar—about how they’d get teased for being teenagers who were also acting (Robert Pattinson) and singing (Christina Aguilera) while in school. It comes off sounding a bit like Gretchen Wieners’ famous “apology” in Mean Girls: “I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me, but I can’t help it that I’m popular.”

Just as you can look on the past with rose-colored glasses once you’re beyond it, couldn’t you also remember it as worse than it was because of the great place you’re at now?

You have someone like Demi Lovato, whose reps disseminated a story about how emotional problems caused by childhood bullying were what caused her to enter rehab last year. But multiple reports, pre-official statement from her camp, circulated saying that Demi’s alcohol and coke benders were what made her finally get help. But it’s easier to lay the blame on childhood issues, right?

Because bullying has become such a hot-button topic, let me interrupt myself to point out that this doesn’t apply to the It Gets Better project. We’re all for people like Lady Gaga and Neil Patrick Harris showing troubled kids that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. What makes those confessions genuine is that they aren’t about the stars winning—it’s about the regular kids eventually winning.

Bullying has been written into nearly every celebrity success story. Why can’t we see a star who admits that s/he was a shit in high school, as many of us were? Or at least, to keep in the vein of It Gets Better and tell their stories with an eye for their followers, and not another round of self-congratulations? Because feeling bad for celebrities is something we shouldn’t have to do.

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Hazing Week Flowchart: Are You Being Hazed?

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 02:29 PM PDT

So you come to in the woods in the middle of the night, and you may or may not be wearing clothes. How do you know if that upperclassman who’s been sneering at you all week set you up, or if you’ve simply partied too hard during Welcome Week? Figure out your fate with our handy “Are You Being Hazed?” flowchart!

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Watch The Trailer For The Other F Word

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 02:13 PM PDT

They’ve got tattoos on their faces and baby bjorns on their backs… The Other F Word is a documentary about punk-rock dads who were once shitty little anarchists in famous bands and are now domestic pops with minivans.

Featuring Mark Huppus of Blink 182, Tony Hawk and Lars Frederiksen of Rancid, among others, this flick takes a look at what it’s like to raise a kid in a world you once wanted to burn down to the ground. Punk is dad… or something like that.

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Gallery: Who Will Courtney Love Trash In Her Memoir?

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 02:00 PM PDT

According to a press release sent out yesterday by HarperCollins Publishers, their imprint William Morrow is slated to publish “the definitive memoir and tell-all by controversial rock star and actress, Courtney Love.” This gets me excited for all kinds of reasons, not the least of which is that, as a lifelong Hole fan, I’m genuinely interested in Courtney Love’s life story and how she decides to tell it. But as a gossip blogger, I’m also pretty excited to see who she’s going to reveal all sorts of unflattering personal shit about, because nobody talks trash as candidly and entertainingly as she does. Will it be Trent Reznor? Ed Norton? Billy Corgan? Here are some possibilities.

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Pam From True Blood Is The Perfect Choice To Play Maleficent On Once Upon A Time

Posted: 30 Sep 2011 01:58 PM PDT

ABC’s new fairy-tales-in-modern-day drama series Once Upon a Time kind of popped up out of nowhere. But what it lacks in build-up, it’s got in awesome female stars: Ginnifer Goodwin and Jennifer Morrison play Snow White and her daughter, and now True Blood‘s Kristen Bauer van Straten has been tapped to play none other than Maleficent, the evil queen from Sleeping Beauty.

And it’ll be soon! Even though the show has one big bad — Lana Parilla as The Evil Queen – Kristen will pop up in episode 2. Of course, before now we’ve been used to only one version of Maleficent: The terrifying queen you see at left. We’ll be curious if the Once Upon a Time costume department follow Disney’s instincts in conjuring flames and devil’s horns for their take, or if she’ll look entirely different.

For all the bullshit that True Blood has gone through in the last few seasons, Kristen’s badass lesbian vampire Pam has always been a welcome source of entertainment. We even got to see actual emotions out of her this season, when the witches cursed poor Eric with losing his memory.

Interestingly, Nip/Tuck‘s Paula Marshall is still listed as playing Maleficent on the show’s Wikipedia page. Then again, as io9 reported, ABC was so excited to actually get Kristen that “they actually booted the first actresses they had down for the role.” Whoops?

OK, so we just watched the trailer, and we have to say it looks kind of great. The story may not hold up to what Disney or others have done with the fairy tales, but from the settings to the costumes to the prince(s), it sure will be pretty.

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