Cele|bitchy |
- Lindsay Lohan through the years: the unnatural evolution of her 3.0 face
- Kristen Stewart flashes her bra in Paris: does she look strung out, or just tired?
- Has Russell Brand fallen under the spell of Guru Singh, a possible scam artist?
- The Queen is not amused by Duchess Kate’s “laziness” and vanity
- Justin Theroux’s Shane Warne-like makeover is disturbing everybody
- Gabriel Aubry thinks Halle Berry is ‘desperate, impatient,’ is he writing a tell all?
- Rihanna to Miranda Lambert: stop talking smack about Chris Brown
- Katy Perry does Paris fashion week with her butt hanging out: avant garde or trashy?
- Lindsay Lohan “is absolutely clear-headed and looks great,” sources say
- Natalie Portman flashes her wedding band repeatedly, she totally married Ballet K-Fed
Lindsay Lohan through the years: the unnatural evolution of her 3.0 face Posted: 02 Mar 2012 09:00 AM PST
[From Radar] This is what addiction does to a person, and I’m talking about serious drug addiction, not plastic surgery addiction, although obviously that’s played into this situation. Drugs change someone’s personality and they mess with their appearance. Lindsay’s situation is not as dramatic as “faces of meth,” but there are parallels here. Remember, this woman is 25! I had to look it up to remind myself, and I’ve been writing about her for years. Holy crap. She looks like she’s at least 40. January 2012, Yet another nose, fillers, drugs, etc. photo credit: PRPhotos, Fame Pictures, WENN.com |
Kristen Stewart flashes her bra in Paris: does she look strung out, or just tired? Posted: 02 Mar 2012 08:52 AM PST Just take this as further evidence that it's a slow post-Oscars gossip day. Here are even more photos of Kristen Stewart in Paris, where she's grimly fulfilling her (likely) million-dollar contract with Balenciaga by appearing at the runway show and showing up to various events. I covered some of the photos yesterday, from outside of the show, where Kristen posed for photos in a bad blouse and killer leather pants. Today, I'm including some shots of Kristen sitting front row at the Balenciaga show, with Salma Hayek and Charlotte Gainsbourg. Can I tell you how much I love this photo of Kristen fully taking in the effortless coolness of Charlotte Gainsbourg? Yes, Kristen. This is what you were attempting. And this is what you fail to be. I like this photo because I think that once Kristen got inside, she was handled by some professional makeup and hair people, and in just a few minutes, everything looked so much better: This is just a great pic. I love how small Kristen looks here – she and Salma are almost the same height! K-Stew is super-tiny. And these are just photos from another, post-Balenciaga outing that Kristen did in Paris. I think she was going out to lunch or something. She looks kind of strung out to me, but I'd be willing to bet she simply isn't wearing makeup, and maybe she's jet-lagged or she was up partying. What's more interesting than that, though, is the outfit. This is her natural style – see-through shirt, skinny jeans, leather jacket, flats. Now… I'll defend her right to dress like a tomboy. I'm fine with it. But I also feel like this is an outfit that Kristen put together with a lot of thought, only she wanted to look like she just threw it on. That's just my opinion of her – she wants people to think that she's simply a nervous, shy, hipster girl who doesn't care. But it's all for effect. Especially considering she's now the "face" of a major fashion label and all of this is "work" for her. |
Has Russell Brand fallen under the spell of Guru Singh, a possible scam artist? Posted: 02 Mar 2012 08:13 AM PST There’s some part of me that realizes that Russell Brand is a womanizing cad at heart. Yet I’ve read his books, so I still feel for the guy after he’s successfully fought his demons of addiction and continues to struggle with them on an at-least daily basis. Yoga seems like a very good fit for Russell in theory, and I sort of speak from experience minus the addictions. Before I was a mother, I used to squeeze in at least an hour (sometimes two) of practice before heading off to work every morning. I wasn’t an expert by any means, but I was proud to have mastered the first few series of Ashtanga and had progressed to the third. There was nothing quite like accomplishing 100 sun salutations before the sun even rose, and it made me feel great inside and out. I really miss it but can’t manage that kind of practice any more and have swapped out yoga for gym runs. Anyway, I can see why Russell has quickly become a yoga aficionado. He’s practiced for years, but ever since he left the Lonely in London scene and returned to California, Russell has fully immersed himself in the quasi-lifestyle and made twice daily trips to the studio where he practices. This week’s In Touch runs with Russell’s apparent yoga obsession and has spoken to a source that says Russell is under the spell of his yoga teacher, Guru Singh. If I had to judge by Russell’s increasingly flamboyent studio-bound attire (the Mail has compared the new look to Mike Myer’s Love Guru), this theory is not beyond the realm of possibility:
[From In Touch, print edition, March 12, 2012] So who is this Guru Singh? Outwardly, he’s a third-generation yogi and master of Kundalini Yoga who has been described as a “yogi, teacher, writer, composer-musician, shaman, ordained minister, healer and family man.” He’s based in Los Angeles and sometimes teaches in India and London as well, and he has a YouTube channel that includes a video where he’ll teach you to be a flower. It is understood that he’s very into pomp and circumstance, and followers who flock to his classes are known to wear turbans while they move through their asanas. It seems a bit excessive, right? Quite possibly, Guru Singh is completely harmless if slightly overbearing. However, there might be a more sinister side to him according to a former student who says that he doesn’t personally speak to any of his students unless they also “happen to attend private sound therapy sessions at his house for $100 per session.” This particular student began to grow worried when her own devotion to his classes made her feel that she’d “even drink poison coolaide [sic]” to please Singh even though she admits that his White Tantric Yoga classes are a scam and only designed to sell videos and merchandise. Here are a few photos of Singh in his various Guru capacities. Look at this dude posing next to the Dalai Lama like he’s the Gwyneth Paltrow of West Hollywood yoga instructors. Yogi famewhore or just an enlightened shaman? Whatever the case, I’m sure that Russell’s devotion to Guru Singh is nowhere near as dangerous as falling into the Scientology trap would be (and you know they’ve probably tried to recruit him by now). So Russell’s probably spending a ton of money on “enlightenment,” but at least it doesn’t seem harmful unless he pulls a groin muscle or something. Quite simply, he’s the pervert yogi who drives a black Range Rover. Meanwhile, Russell is still hooking up with fellow yogi Oriela, whose mom has spoken to Star magazine (thanks, mom!) about how much she adores Russell even though it sounds like they’ve never met:
[From Star, print edition, March 12, 2012] Again, another media outlet gets it wrong about Russell stepping out with “another babe.” Just like Fame Pictures misidentified Russell’s companion as well when it was merely Oriela without makeup. He seems semi-serious with this woman, but I doubt they’ll be walking down the aisle together. And of course her mother likes him, for Oriela is an aspiring (dreadful) actress and could really use Russell’s Hollywood connections. Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet, WENN, and GuruSingh.com |
The Queen is not amused by Duchess Kate’s “laziness” and vanity Posted: 02 Mar 2012 08:12 AM PST This In Touch Weekly story gave me an enormous amount of pleasure. Not that I'm cosigning it, and not that I think it's 100% genuine, but I just enjoy that the tabloids are playing catch-up on the fact that Duchess Kate is much less than the sum of her propaganda. In Touch's "royal sources" claim that Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, thinks Kate is rather dull. And lazy. And dumb. And vain. This actually isn't the first time we've heard about the Queen's questioning of Kate's work ethic – it was widely reported (by legit and tabloid sources) that several years before William proposed to Kate, the Queen wanted to know if Kate was ever going to get a real job. The Queen thought it was unbecoming for a young, unmarried woman to simply spent her 20s waiting around for a prince. And now that Kate has married into "The Firm," the Queen is still wondering, "Seriously, is this woman ever going to do anything?"
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] Basically, the Queen and I are the same person. We have the same complaints, only mine are centered mostly on how Kate prioritizes shopping and salon appointments much more than any royal duty. And of course, I've been calling Kate "hilariously lazy" for years. It's true – she is. Sigh… I wish I could hang out with Liz and the corgis. We could Mean-Girl the Duchess of Dolittle. "OMG, her eyeliner," I would say to the Queen. "Quite right. She needs to get off 'er arse!" the Queen replies. And before The Duchess Patrol comes and cries about how Kate is STILL LEARNING, etc, let me just say – sure. I do believe she's still learning. As I've said, there's a learning curve for new royalty, and I do applaud her for not making any major (or even minor) fumbles when she does do an event. But there are two big issues: one, she isn't doing enough events. At all. Because she's lazy. And two, Kate is kind of vapid. I mean… William married her, and she does seem like a "nice" girl, but she's not some bright, shining, independent role model. She just… waited. She’s patient. And dull. As we were discussing in the earlier post, when Kate speaks, it's not like she's ever blowing people away with her insightful comments or sparkling wit. She says things like, "I love chocolate. I think all girls like chocolate" and admitting that she doesn't know how to make a cup of tea. And of course, there's this video which highlights her lack of… something. Lack of preparation. Lack of concern. Lack of interest. Lack of ability to do anything but stutter talking points. |
Justin Theroux’s Shane Warne-like makeover is disturbing everybody Posted: 02 Mar 2012 06:42 AM PST For months, the most recent photos we had of Justin Theroux were from last September and October. It was obvious at that point that he was getting a makeover from his girlfriend – gone was the burly, unkempt beard, gone was decade-old hipster uniform. I do think the change was gradual – Jennifer encouraged him to dress better, while still holding on to his leather jacket, his motorcycle boots and his skinny jeans. And then when it came time for the Wanderlust promotional tour, suddenly Justin was barely recognizable – suddenly he was Shane Warne'd. He was hyper-groomed, fake-tanned, teeth-whitened and curiously bangs'd. Jennifer remade him like Justin was her personal Ken doll. And he seemed happy with the transformation too, judging from his appearance on Ellen – he played it all up, and he seems genuinely game for "The Jen and Justin Show". So what does it all mean?
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] I love how In Touch Weekly is like, "Jennifer probably doesn't know this, but Justin totally signed on to CAA and now his asking price has gone up!" Please. THAT was part of their deal. That's part of the deal when you sign on to be Aniston's boyfriend – you're signing on to be managed (and micro-managed) by CAA. As for the asking price – while that's been wildly reported before, I doubt it still holds. Not after his bangsy, orange appearance during the Wanderlust promotion, and not after Wanderlust opened with… $6.6 million. Your asking price can’t be more than opening weekend. Rough. |
Gabriel Aubry thinks Halle Berry is ‘desperate, impatient,’ is he writing a tell all? Posted: 02 Mar 2012 06:40 AM PST
[From Radar] I buy that Gabriel is a good dad, but I also buy that he could benefit from anger management courses, and I’m glad he’s complying with the court order. All in all, this is a convincing story by Gabriel’s side, and I hope that he’s right that Halle will get shut down in court. If it takes a whole year before the judge will rule on her request to move to France she’ll probably be broken up with Oliver Martinez by then anyway. Where is she going to move then, and what will her excuse be? Sure she fears the paparazzi, but she could move an hour or two from L.A. and have a lot more privacy. Or, as many of you have mentioned, she could also just move to a gated community or get more security. Problem solved. After I wrote all that, another story came out in Radar about how “Gabriel is being urged to write a no-holds barred book about what his relationship with Halle was really about.” He swears he’s not going to write it, but he’s putting it out there very strongly anyway. This pretty much solidifies my earlier opinion of him. Someone needs to take the high road and he’s not doing it! He could have left it with the earlier story, which I thought sounded too mature for him. Here’s part of Radar’s story.
[From Radar] Gabriel needs to just STOP. We get it, Halle is manipulative and controlling. And he’s petty and whiny. There’s legitimately defending yourself and there’s being threatening and passive aggressive. At least he’s not actually writing a tell all. Time will tell though, because it sounds like he’s really considering it and is trying to use it as leverage. Gabe and Nahla are shown at the zoo on 2/19/12 and outside her school on 2/28/12. He’s doing a lot of photo ops. Halle and Nahla are shown on 2/26/12. Credit: WENN.com and FameFlynet |
Rihanna to Miranda Lambert: stop talking smack about Chris Brown Posted: 02 Mar 2012 05:57 AM PST
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, March 12, 2012] This could just be a clever way for The Enquirer to squeeze a new angle out of this story, but the fact that they add the detail that Rihanna actually called Miranda makes me think it’s true. You can imagine Rihanna telling another woman to mind her own business, especially since she’s probably sleeping with Chris again. But does Rihanna even know that Blake Shelton is supposedly a cheater? The Enquirer has been running stories about him for a while, but they’re not getting a lot of press so who knows if this is true. That last line in the story about how people should forgive the perp because the victim does doesn’t sit well with me. That’s not how the justice system works, and it wouldn’t be fair to anyone, particularly future victims, if it did. Just because someone forgives an abuser (or a rapist, etc.) doesn’t mean that they’ve changed their ways, or that they shouldn’t face the consequences for their crime. That includes having people talk smack about them, which seems an incredibly minor thing compared to what Chris did. It’s a shame Rihanna can’t see that. Here’s Rihanna’s latest outfit in London yesterday. Leather mid-thigh boots, studded white shorts, a denim shirt and another denim shirt wrapped around her waist and tucked under her shorts. At least she’s consistent. Photo credit: WENN.com |
Katy Perry does Paris fashion week with her butt hanging out: avant garde or trashy? Posted: 02 Mar 2012 05:47 AM PST Somehow I doubt that when Lady Gaga said that mint would be big this spring that she was talking about this. Katy Perry is currently attending Paris Fashion Week and doesn’t look nearly as “incognito” as she did while shuffling through Heathrow a few days ago. Katy has also abandoned all pretenses of appearing tasteful and fresh as well. Instead, Katy stepped out on her way to the front rows of fashion while wearing a disastrous mint-colored Vera Wang number that left half her butt cheeks exposed for all to see. Such a classy move, right? What’s even classier is that Katy is reportedly supporting Rihanna in her ongoing dance with death, i.e., getting back together with Chris Brown:
[From Hollywood Life] I don’t see what would make Rihanna so “happy” about getting the hell beat out of her again, but I guess that’s what she wants, which is pretty dark stuff. In keeping with that theme, Katy has declared that her next album won’t be nearly as sugary as her usual fare and will be quite “dark” too.
[From Ace Showbiz] Yeah, I’ll believe it when I see it. Katy simply can’t go “dark” and keep her target audience of tweens and dance recital teachers coming back. However, if she does start writing heavier, more depressing material, then maybe that’ll be the end of her #1 hits of which she has seven. Seven. Anyway, this mint outfit is truly terrible. In addition to the butt-flashing problem, Katy’s massive rack looked about as uncontrolled as it did at the Grammys. She makes so many millions of dollars — can’t she afford a proper bra? Update by Celebitchy: Here’s Katy Perry arriving at the “Maison Du Caviar Party” in Paris last night. The photo agency Fame writes that she was there with Karl Lagerfeld, so I’m assuming this trashy over-embellished too-short dress is Chanel. Bedhead is right, she has no idea what to do with her boobs. Katy’s dark roots and blue hair combo continue to defy the laws of hair logic. I hope she’s actually serious about quitting the color-changing nonsense soon, but I won’t hold my breath. Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet |
Lindsay Lohan “is absolutely clear-headed and looks great,” sources say Posted: 02 Mar 2012 04:39 AM PST I'm still thinking about Lindsay Lohan's Today interview, which we talked about yesterday. My initial reactions were rage and disgust, and as the hours passed… I think I'm just feeling that LL is simply pathetic. I'm not sympathetic towards her at all, but in the scope of even trying to fact-check her crack-lie-extravaganza, I'll simply throw up my hands. She's just pathetic. But in her crack-mind, she's awesome. She thinks she's convincing us of her amazing comeback. She thinks we still believe she's super-talented and that she just needs to be given the chance (!!!) to win an Oscar. Is that "sad"? Or are you just thinking, "Meh. Same old crackie"? What was equally disturbing about the Today interview was her obviously drugged-out, busted appearance, and how Matt Lauer did not call her out on any of the obvious subjects. Like, "Why do you look like that? What happened to your face? Does your voice sound like that because you were up all night guzzling vodka and chain-smoking?" Instead, Lauer made a point to say that LL looked "great". Haha. Meanwhile, even legit media outlets are talking about how awful the Cracken looks - Us Weekly ran a story a few days ago with the headline – no joke – "What Really Happened To Lindsay Lohan's Face?" Their answer: "Since she doesn’t appear to have gained weight, it’s likely that her fuller features are the result of facial fillers like Restylane or Juvederm. And that’s not the only dramatic change she’s sporting right now. Lohan recently added heavy, blunt bangs to her and extra-long extensions to her platinum hair." Yes, fillers and a bad wig. That's all, right? Oh, and in this week's In Touch Weekly, a plastic surgeon claims that LL has had a "shield graft" on her nose – you should just look at the before-and-after images of LL's nose. So who is going to watch LL on tomorrow's Saturday Night Live? Will the ratings be any good? Will the writing be any good? Will LL be self-aware and make lots of jokes at her expense? How puffy will her face be? What's especially hilarious is that LL's rep, Steve Honig, has been working extra hard to provide lots of quotes to media outlets about how everybody at SNL loves the Cracken. He went on the record with Radar, saying: "Lindsay has been a longtime fan of Saturday Night Live and is incredibly excited to host the show and work with the amazing cast and writers." After that, an "insider" took over, and note how the wording still sounds like Honig: "Lindsay had been a little nervous about how the cast and crew would treat her. Lindsay arrived early for rehearsals on Tuesday, and was embraced warmly by everyone. Lindsay’s comedic timing is absolutely flawless. She is absolutely clear headed, and looks great." OMG. Why does everyone keep saying she looks great?!?! UPDATE: The Cracken was on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night. I don’t… uh. |
Natalie Portman flashes her wedding band repeatedly, she totally married Ballet K-Fed Posted: 02 Mar 2012 04:13 AM PST In the post-game analysis of the Oscars, several media outlets picked up on the fact that Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepied seemed to be wearing wedding bands when they walked the Oscar red carpet. Benjamin and Natalie had been very quiet about their relationship – I think Natalie's only public statements about all of it were in the form of the pregnancy announcement in 2010 and her acceptance speeches during all of the awards shows last year. When Natalie gave birth to little Aleph, I actually thought to myself, "Hunh. I bet they got married very quietly because Natalie seems like the kind of girl who doesn't want to give birth 'out of wedlock'." Still, there was never a confirmation until everyone picked up on the "wedding bands" thing. And now Natalie's jeweler is speaking – and confirming the secret marriage?
[From Us Weekly] Is this how it's done these days? You announce your secret wedding via your jeweler? Anyway, since the Oscars, Natalie has been photographed several times in LA, and in every photo set, she's still wearing the "wedding band" plus a nice-sized diamond ring. Yeah… I think they're married. Do you think she got a pre-nup? I used to think she was so smart and worldly, but if she got hitched to her Ballet K-Fed without a prenup, I'll have some concerns. |
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