Friday, December 9, 2011

Crushable

Crushable


Update: Sinead O’Connor Posted A Crazy And Inappropriate Wedding Announcement

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 10:43 AM PST

Well, it looks like at least the first day of Sinead O’Connor‘s new marriage to Berry Herridge is going well. The Irish songstress has updated us all on the arrangement via her blog, and it sure does take a turn for the salacious:

“Dear friends… amongst whom I include whomever may be reading this with a view to writing about the glorious marriage. Am blogging this cus media people are naturally seeking me. On sunday I will put up blog on whole day. Too glorious for words. For now though, as you will appreciate, it’s a bit of a ‘Can’t. Talk. Cock. In. Mouth’. Situation.”

All right, good to know! Mazel tov? Or is that some sort of a medical situation? We’ll stay on the case.
(via Gawker)

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Gallery: Kirsten Dunst And Jim Sturgess Are From Parallel Worlds In The Sci-Fi Romance Upside Down

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 10:22 AM PST

I’ve been interested in the upcoming romance Upside Down since I first heard of its simple but wacky premise: Jim Sturgess and Kirsten Dunst live in two worlds inverted on top of each other, but fall in love despite the laws of science and gravity keeping them apart. The posters above illustrate it better, as do the first batch of images released courtesy of Bleeding Cool.

Here’s the official synopsis:

Adam is a seemingly ordinary guy in a very extraordinary universe. He lives humbly trying to make ends meet, but his romantic spirit holds on to the memory of a girl he met once upon a time from another world, an inverted affluent world with its own gravity, directly above but beyond reach… a girl named Eve. Their childhood flirtation becomes an impossible love. But when he catches a glimpse of grown-up Eve on television, nothing will get in the way of getting her back… Not even the law or science!

From the photos, it looks as if Adam is trying to fit into Eve’s world — sort of an In Time thing going on — despite a possible other suitor. There’s a fun whimsy to the images of Jim’s tie floating upside down, etc., but it seems like the movie will also include a commentary on the haves and have-nots.

Photos: Bleeding Cool

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Ke$ha Starts A Blog Dedicated To Her Beard Fetish

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 10:12 AM PST

You’ve got to hand it to Ke$ha: her talents may be dubious, but they are legion. In addition to writing annoying-but-catchy radio hits, wearing mullet dresses, and dueling with James Van Der Beek, she can now add one more weird line to her resume: Founder and Editor-In-Chief of her very own beard fetish blog.

“Launched” earlier this week, putyourbeardinmymouth.tumblr.com already contains two pages of, you guessed it, photos of guys putting their beards in Ke$ha’s mouth, alongside descriptive captions like “Fresh out of prison beard,” “Magical wizard beard,” and “does the carpet match the curtains??? VIVA LAS GINGERBEARDS!!”

The garbage princess has also created this single minded music video to aid her in her quixotic quest to taste every beard in America:

Put Your Beard In My Mouth from Magic Seed Productions on Vimeo.

Good luck and God speed.

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The Daily WTF: 80-Year-Old Woman Faces Criminal Charges For Feeding Ducks

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 10:11 AM PST

80-year-old Claire Butcher of Lynn, Massachusetts just wants to feed some ducks, darn it, but local authorities won’t have it. After an eight-year battle to get Claire to stop feeding birds at the local pond — a prohibited activity — the city is finally pressing charges.

The problem is, Claire’s duck feeding is more than just an errant slice of wheat every now and again — the 80-year-old regularly brings shopping carts full of bread and dog food down to the pond, which encourages huge numbers of birds to stay in the area and shit all over everything.

Authorities don’t really want to send ol’ Claire to jail, they just want her to stop feeding the damn ducks! This feels like a Michel Gondry movie in the making.

(via BuzzFeed)

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Chick Flick Check List: New Year’s Eve

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 09:42 AM PST

Gary Marshall‘s new celebrity montage movie New Year’s Eve is basically an extended infomercial for Mike Bloomberg‘s Times Square. The movie contains more celebrities than Jason Sudeikis‘ bed during SNL‘s off season. Depending on your feelings for weird celebrity pairings, you will either ignore this movie, go see it with your girlfriends, or confuse it for Valentines Day and accidentally watch it on cable for 20 minutes a year from now.

And that’s OK with Gary Marshall, who these days seems more interested in how many people (and family members) he can fit into a film than actually creating a coherent plot line or emotional tension. But should you hate watch this movie or skip it? Check out today’s Chick Flick Check List to find out.

New Year’s Eve’s Chick Flick Check List Rating: 66

Likability of the lead: 5/10
No one’s really on screen long enough for the audience to develop any sincere feelings about their struggles and story arc. Also, this movie has a built in self-destruct time of midnight. Since you know everything will get sorted out by then, it’s more a countdown to see which celebrities will make out with whom.

Chemistry Between The Leads: 5/10
It’s hard to develop any sort of chemistry with your scene partner when you’ve got 2.5 minutes of the audience’s attention at a clip. Though New Year’s Eve does a good job keeping Michelle Pfeiffer and Zac Efron on screen long enough to give you hope that he will her a Breakfast Club-esque makeover and introduce her to everyone on his wrestling team. Unfortunately, Molly Ringwald never shows up to give her a lesson in lip gloss application. Downer.

Plot/Script: 5/10
There are so many people in this movie that a few of them have to shoulder their way into actually having speaking parts. Not only did Alyssa Milano, Sarah Paulson and Carla Giugino get shafted from the poster, but Greg Kinnear never even made it into the final cut of the movie. There are a lot of moments that are hastily thrown together. And Marshall doesn’t even worry about it. When you have this many people in a movie, you don’t need montages to get the plot moving. You just literally make the actors run through the screen to get their story lines tied up before the closing credits.

Chance of wringing tears out of viewers: 6/10
Halle Berry gets a little teary eyed moment, and Robert DeNiro plays a cancer patient! If you’re an easy cryer, they might get a few drops out of you. But there’s not enough time to pay attention to anyone in particular to care too much.

Wardrobe: 8/10
There are plenty of hot dresses and sequins and tuxedos in this movie to keep everyone entertained. And depending on your feelings about Sophia Vergara‘s breasts, you will either get a pleasant or unpleasant surprise towards the end of the movie.

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Video: Know Your Meme Compiles The Best Memes Of 2011

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 09:37 AM PST

Can you believe that planking has been around for less than a year? Or that this time in 2010, we had no idea who Rebecca Black was? The folks at Know Your Meme have compiled a “best of 2011″ video in which they give us their highly scientific, thoroughly-researched explanations for how we came to take photos of ourselves lying on random objects, or why a little cat with a Pop Tart and a Japanese pop song makes us smile.

And it’s hosted by Kristina Horner, who created the “What Would Buffy Do?” video we linked to awhile back.

What, Hipster Matt Damon didn’t make the cut?

There are some memes that you might have seen but never known the same of, like Scumbag Steve. You might also recognize “x ALL the y,” taken from the comics of Allie Brosh (former contributor to TheGloss!). Also, is Nyan Cat really pronounced “ny-ahhn”? This whole time we’ve been saying “nyaaan”…

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Michael Jackson’s Daughter, Paris, Set To Appear In Film

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 09:30 AM PST

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Brad Pitt Threw A Cheeseburger At An Obnoxious Fan

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 09:33 AM PST

It’s like that old saying goes, “You can’t have your cheeseburger and throw it too.” Brad Pitt learned this lesson the hard way when a starstruck fan started bugging him on a fast food run, causing him to let fly his cheeseburger. The story comes straight from the lips of Matt Damon:

"Brad [Pitt] threw a cheeseburger at somebody. The guy had followed him to the drive-thru and Brad was like, 'Can I just eat my cheeseburger?' … They both looked at each other in total shock for a long moment. Neither of them could believe that it happened, you know? And then the guy went to raise his camera, and Brad sped off. So he did not get the picture. Brad left that experience feeling like, 'Well, I didn't get to eat my cheeseburger. I really wanted it.'"

I feel like I’d have a better understanding of who the victim in this scenario is if I knew where the cheeseburger was from. McDonalds? Blech — that fan better head straight for the dry cleaners. But if the burger were, say, from In-N-Out, then I am weeping for Brad’s loss.

(via Videogum, whose brilliant photo we have also used)

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Not Surprisingly, A Fake Kris Jenner Upstaged The Kim Kardashian Lookalike Contest

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 08:55 AM PST

Who ever thought we’d hear Kim Kardashian‘s name combined with “art”? But the reality show star was the focus of a lookalike contest held at the Art Basel Miami festival just the other night, where 28 hopefuls curled their hair, padded their asses, and recreated some of Kim’s iconic looks in the hopes of getting the $1,000 prize. Artist Ryder Ripps, whose work deals with Facebook and our experiences with the computer, called it, “Where’s Waldo for the art set.”

The ladies were asked questions about Kim’s ethnicity — “Whatever nationality is trendy right now!” a quick-witted one answered — as well as actual artists like Picasso, while showing off the accuracy of their costumes. You might be surprised to learn, however, that there were ultimately two winners. Metisha LaRocca was the most convincing Kim in a knock-off Hermes dress, but the judges couldn’t ignore a hilarious Kris Jenner impersonator who helped to calm down the crowd and provided witty running commentary.

So even in pretend-world, Kris is overbearing and gloms on to her daughters’ success. Personally, our favorites were the two Kims below: Liz Rywelski imitating the famous Twitpic of Kim’s nasty sunburn, and an unnamed contestant who recreated Kim’s W magazine cover where she was naked and covered in silver body paint. (In fact, W posted about the homage the other day.)

This isn’t the first time that Kim lookalikes have been called to show their stuff. Celebuzz held a similar contest back in 2009, but with a twist: It was also open to drag queens.

Photos: Benjamin Lozovsky/BFANYC.com

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Sinead O’Connor Marries Barry Herridge In Drive-Thru Wedding

Posted: 09 Dec 2011 08:45 AM PST

It was but three short months ago that Sinead O’Connor took out a personal ad looking for hot and steamy casual sex. And now she’s gone and gotten hitched for the fourth time. Yesterday, on her 45th birthday, Sinead wed therapist Barry Herridge in a ceremony at the Little White Chapel in Las Vegas.

The date of the wedding has special significance for Sinead who, by turning 45, has outlived her own mother. She explained, “I have now lived longer than my own mother, who died three months before her own 45th birthday. I’ve read that it’s a pivotal day in your life when you reach the birthday that your parent never saw, and here I am being married on it to the man I love.”

Sinead’s third marriage, to Steve Cooney, lasted less than a year, ending in April of 2011. But Barry apparently has high hopes for this relationship, saying, “This is the only time I will ever marry, and Sinead is the only person I am going to marry. This is a great day, and the beginning of many more great days.”

I have to wonder if Sinead and Barry met through that personal ad. They clearly have not known each other for very long, and he seems like an able-bodied young gent — just what Sinead was looking for.

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