Cele|bitchy

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• “Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux did holiday cards together” links
• Matt Damon on Obama: “a one-term president with some balls would have been better.”
• Duchess Kate’s olive green Ralph Lauren sweater-dress: lovely or busted?
• Angelina Jolie is “determined” to have more babies in 2012
• Ashton Kutcher is renting a new bachelor pad for $50,000 per month
• Adam Lambert arrested & held in jail after drunkenly attacking boyfriend in Finland
• Paris Hilton covers Vanity Fair Spain: sadly nostalgic or just hideous?
• Tom Cruise gets called out as client of famous Brazilian plastic surgeon
• Adele to cover March issue of US Vogue, having plus-sized clothes specially made
• Review of ‘The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo’: must see or must miss?

“Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux did holiday cards together” links Posted: 22 Dec 2011 08:35 AM PST Jennifer Aniston & Justin Theroux did their Christmas cards together. [LaineyGossip] Are these Brad Pitt quotes new? I think he's said this before. [Celebrity Baby Scoop] This video of a big sister calming down her baby sister is awesome. [Videogum] How is JWoww's bikini top staying on?!? [Amy Grindhouse] Elisabetta Canalis versus Stacy Keibler: who looks better? [Moe Jackson] Pres. Obama did some Christmas shopping for Bo & the girls. [Jezebel] Kris Humphries got booed like crazy at the Nets game. [Bossip] Prince William busts a move. [The Frisky] The Cracken is in NYC now. Watch out, NY Celebitches. [Radar] All about Britney Spears' $92,000 engagement ring. [Life & Style] Kanye West will FREAK OUT if you throw your business card on stage. [PopBytes] Eva Longoria gets a Ken Paves blowout. [Hollywood Rag] A billionaire's daughter got herself an $88 million dorm room in NYC. [LimeLife] The UK bans Taylor Swift's Covergirl ads. [Celebs] These LOLBabies are really cute. [CityRag] Honor Alba-Warren is getting a Barbie Mustang convertible! [Bitten and Bound] Look at how huge Gisele & Tom Brady's house is. [Starpulse]

Matt Damon on Obama: “a one-term president with some balls would have been better.” Posted: 22 Dec 2011 07:37 AM PST Oh that Matt Damon*. He usually just tells the same stories over and over again in his press tours, so it’s nice to see him very occasionally bitching about politics. I get the sense that he’d like to say stuff like this in every interview, but that he holds it in until it comes seeping out like steam from a boiling kettle. Remember when he called Sarah Palin “absurd, like a bad Disney movie” way back in 2008 before that was pretty much the accepted opinion about her? A quick glance at our archives reminds me that he’s also expressed discontent about Obama, whom he campaigned for, earlier this year and last year. So he does mete out his political opinions rather judiciously. In a new profile in Elle, they seem to realize that the most headline worthy Damon is one that has a strong opinion. The bulk of the piece is just an overview of his life and career. There aren’t many quotes from Damon in the story, but the ones they do include at the end pack a punch. I wonder if he said a bunch of other stuff and they just left it out, or if they only asked him about Obama. Is it mere coincidence that today, just down the Vancouver street from where Damon sits, the first day of Occupy Wall Street–offshoot wildfire has flared up over the border? "I've talked to a lot of people who worked for Obama at the grassroots level. One of them said to me, 'Never again. I will never be fooled again by a politician,' " Damon says, his disappointment ringing with a now-familiar tone of wounded idealism. "You know, a one-term president with some balls who actually got stuff done would have been, in the long run of the country, much better." Damon gestures in the direction, just out of sight over the tree line, of the sign-wielding picketers who are beginning to gather steam. "If the Democrats think that they didn't have a mandate—people are literally without any focus or leadership, just wandering out into the streets to yell right now because they are so pissed off," he says. "Imagine if they had a leader." And, as on the day of that DC rally, it is momentarily possible to get swept up in the moment, to imagine—however ridiculously, whether in reality or coming soon to a multiplex near you—exactly that. [From Elle.com] I don’t disagree with him, but I think it’s much more complicated than just blaming the President. I like angry/impassioned Matt Damon the best though. He’s the sexiest when he gets worked up about something. This guy has said multiple times that he’s not going to go into politics, but I don’t believe him. It may take another 10 to 15 years, but I expect to see him try. *Note that I wrote that before I checked E! Online this morning and saw that they started their article on this story the very same way. Great minds. Here’s Damon campaigning for Obama in 2008. He’s also shown in December and September of this year. Credit: WENN and Fame

Duchess Kate’s olive green Ralph Lauren sweater-dress: lovely or busted? Posted: 22 Dec 2011 07:36 AM PST A few nights ago, Duchess Kate and her husband and her brother-in-law all went to an awards ceremony for military personnel. Kate wore a rather gorgeous Alexander McQueen gown that was pretty much universally loved. The only thing most of bitched about was her "signature" Waity-Katy curls o'plenty. Kate has one hairstyle, even for red carpet events. Anyway, when I was looking through those photos, I remarked on Kate's figure, and how she was looking healthier. Not so emaciated, more toned and fit, like she'd been eating solids and exercising. Well, I take it back. These are new photos of Kate and Will at Centrepoint, a charity dealing with the homeless. William is a patron of the charity, as was his mother. This was Will and Kate's final charitable outing of the year, and look at how Kate chose to present herself. A sweater dress and little toothpick legs. I'm sorry, but those legs are not aspirational. Those legs frighten me. Probably because I remember how lovely and athletic her legs used to be – she used to look like an athletic girl, with toned, lovely legs, and now I feel like she could snap like a twig. Ugh. The sweater dress is Ralph Lauren, by the way. It costs 350 pounds, which is… what? About $500-550? And she wore that to a homeless charity event? Sure. Okay. So, do we even have to talk about the possibility that she's pregnant? I feel like she's not. I feel like she's not going to get knocked up until well into next year. Someone give her a carton of cigs for Christmas, because she's not going to have to put on the baby weight for a while. One last thing – and yes, I'm a broken record about this, but I just want to say it again. STOP saying that Kate is a classy dresser. She's not. She's skinny and she has barely any bust or hips or curves in any way, which is how she can pull off wearing skin-tight sweaterdresses and low-cut silk jersey dresses. If someone built like Sofia Vergara – or even Blake Lively, with her "enhanced" curves – tried to wear Kate's outfits, it would look trashy and obscene. PS… I swear, she's doubling-down on the eye-liner. I think she's added some blue eye shadow contouring. Also: I really hope Kate's New Year's resolution is to STOP PLAYING WITH HER HAIR. Photos courtesy of WENN.

Angelina Jolie is “determined” to have more babies in 2012 Posted: 22 Dec 2011 07:34 AM PST OK! Magazine has a story about Angelina Jolie's womb this week. Yes, the awards season has begun! When was it… 2008, right? Angelina was nominated for several awards for A Mighty Heart. Angelina showed up at the 2008 SAGs in that horrible vintage sack, and everyone was like "OMG, she's wearing a sack because she's preggo!" And then came the Independent Spirit Awards, and the big reveal of the bump that held twins Vivienne and Knox. So what will this year's Brangelina-filled awards season bring? Another bump debut? That's what OK! Magazine is hinting at: Brad Pitt lifted a glass of sparkling wine and toasted Angelina Jolie, as the couple's friends and family looked on at Hollywood's Magnolia restaurant. The pair was there Dec. 8 to salute Angelina's directorial debut, but Brad and Angie also appeared to delight in their own much more private news: They want a new baby in 2012. Now that the youngest of their brood of six children, twins Knox and Vivienne, are 3, Angelina, 36, is ready to expand her family. "She jokes about triplets constantly. And she's not a big joker, really," says a confidante. "She and Brad have talked at length. There's no doubt in anyone's mind that she'll have another child." Although the couple is playing coy with the media, it's difficult not to see their delight. "Nothing is planned…. I could end up pregnant," Angie recently said. Brad, too, also let slip about the family's desire for more children. "I don't know that we're finished. I don't know," he said on 60 Minutes. Certainly, the Jolie-Pitts are in a unique position to be able to afford as many children as they want, but the confidante says that though money isn't an issue, Angie may be taking a risk with her health: "It's very serious. She's had two very high-risk pregnancies. Both times, her blood pressure shot up, and she developed gestational diabetes. I don't know if she could survive a third round." But Brad, 47, is caught up in the thrill of becoming a dad again, and Angelina, who is used to getting exactly what she wants, plans to become pregnant despite any potential problems. "Angelina is determined," says another insider. "She is dead set on giving the kids a baby brother or sister as soon as possible." [From OK! Magazine] As I've said before, I wouldn't be surprised if Brad and Angelina had more kids. I keep expecting them to adopt another baby, but I could totally see them having another biological kid too. I'm actually kind of impressed that they've waited this long to add to their family – I think they might have gotten overwhelmed when the twins came, and despite their claims that they were open to more babies, they decided to stay at six kids for a while. So, is Angelina already knocked up? Will she be debuting a bump at a future red carpet? Probably not. Even if she's already getting knocked up right now, she'll wait to announce it. In other Brangelina news, Angie has a new interview with MTV News. Video is below, but here's the big quote, re: In the Land of Blood and Honey: “I hope for the audience watching that it isn’t just a history lesson, it isn’t just a political film, it isn’t just Bosnia. We tried to tell a dramatic story, we tried to make a good film with great actors, we tried to just give traditional dramatic storytelling, and somehow in that, we also layered all these other things and it’s a part of it. Even if you’re not particularly interested in history, which I can’t imagine because it’s important, but if [you want to see something] just for filmmaking or just to see performances or just to see a story, an emotional relationship story, that’s this film.” Get More: Movie Trailers, Movies Blog Photos courtesy of WENN.

Ashton Kutcher is renting a new bachelor pad for $50,000 per month Posted: 22 Dec 2011 07:30 AM PST Ever since landing Charlie Sheen’s old spot on “Two and a Half Men,” Ashton Kutcher’s life has truly vaulted into excess. First, there was the news that Ashton was gifted with a 1000-sq-ft luxury trailer for his on-set dalliances, and now Ashton has decided that his post-Demi Moore life must hit equally gaudy heights. As such, the douche supreme has rented this 10,000-sq-ft architectural “wonder” in the Hollywood Hills that boasts 5 bedrooms, 8 baths, fully retractable walls of glass, floating dining room, screening room, infinity pool, and an open sky terrace. How much is Ashton paying to live here? $50,000 per month. I guess as the highest-paid sitcom actor in current existence, he can afford it. For now, anyway. At the moment, however, Ashton is in Berlin to formalize yet another one of his start-up companies. This time, it’s a German-backed IT company named “Amen,” but Ashton wasted no time after hours in chasing the poontang dragon. Here he is all hungover looking after leaving a bar with no less than three women. Berlin.de even says that one of the girls looked a lot like a youthful version of Demi Moore. Some of the article gets lost in translation, but you’ll get the gist: No less than three ladies he drove home in his BMW 7 Series. In the morning, 3.47 clock in the middle. Ashton Kutcher (33) strode out of a gate on the road. Wide-screen grin, cigarette in mouth, three girls there. The end of a long night. A life-smiling blonde in beige trench coat and thigh. A dark-haired with Dutt, transparent shell, and fur. And a black cloak and dressed with hair down to the bottom. Her dark mane-center parting, some may remember Demi Moore, in a much younger version. The Hollywood stallion is finally traveling on business. He spent from his private fortune in the new communications platform, “Amen.” which aims to make the Berlin Felix Petersen It-medium a la Facebook. The million-deal is now sealed and celebrated. Monday night we went. Ashton first tweeted with an entourage for a clock in the morning a few long drinks in the “Odessa” bar (Torstraße) and tweeted: “Berlin already sleeping around?” Not so! Since the mid-watches Hipperia show up. That happened to the “Two and Half Men,” then-husband to the private party in the third Upstairs one of the best addresses in town. With red wine in hand, he leaned against the window, waved high spontaneous woman who lost standing around in the yard. Then he busied himself with the brunette. No scene-cuts, a grown girl in a black blazer, rather than for short conversations for long nights. [From Berlin.de] Ugh. He is so disgusting, and I honestly don’t know why chicks dig him at all. Sure, he’s famous and rich, but I just don’t see the attraction. Not only is he a douchey prick, but he’s got some increasingly pronounced chipmunk cheeks going on too. Meanwhile, the Hollywood reporter has a new interview with Chuck Lorre where he discusses how wonderful Ashton is as a human being and that the two have talked about continuing the current arrangement for future seasons of “Two and a Half Men.” So I guess Ashton will be able to afford his ridiculous lifestyle for some time to come. Gross. Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News and WENN

Adam Lambert arrested & held in jail after drunkenly attacking boyfriend in Finland Posted: 22 Dec 2011 06:42 AM PST I usually don't pay any attention to Glambert, so this is the first time I'm actually looking at Adam Lambert's boyfriend, Sauli Koskinen. Um, OMG. Look at how TINY he is! Adam Lambert is dating a Hobbit. He literally has a pocket boyfriend. Anyway, it seems like Adam and Sauli had a bit of an incident in Finland, of all places. Adam and Sauli were in a gay bar called Don't Tell Momma, and Adam started getting violent. Former American Idol star Adam Lambert was arrested following a fight with his boyfriend outside a Helsinki, Finland bar on Thursday. Lambert, 29, and boyfriend Sauli Koskinen, 26, got into the altercation outside a gay bar called Don’t Tell Momma, according to Finnish reports. When patrons outside the establishment tried to stop the altercation, Lambert attacked them as well, though no one was injured. Koskinen, also a TV star, won Finland's 2007 edition of the reality competition Big Brother. Lambert, who finished second in 2009′s American Idol competition to Kris Allen, was still in custody at a facility in Pasila, while Sauli was held at a jail in Toolo. [From Radar] Ah, so Sauli is a Finn. That's why they were in Finland. Anyhoodle, The Hollywood Reporter has much more on this violent attack: American Idol star Adam Lambert spent several hours in a Finnish jail Thursday after being arrested outside a Helsinki gay bar following a brawl with his Finnish boyfriend, local reality star Sauli Koskinen. According to Petri Juvonen, who is heading up the police investigation into the event, Lambert and Koskinen were arrested at around 4 a.m. Thursday morning outside DTM (Don't Tell Mama), a famous Helsinki gay club. Both men are being held for questioning as local police investigate a total of four possible assault offenses. Juvonen tells the Hollywood Reporter that the two would likely be released after being interrogated. According to media reports out of Finland, the dispute between the two men started in one of DTM's back rooms. Lambert and Koskinen, a winner of the Finnish version of Big Brother, were apparently kicked out of the club but carried on fighting in the street outside. Finnish beauty queen Sofia Ruusila, an ex-Miss Helsinki, who had been celebrating with Lambert and Koskinen, told a Finnish entertainment channel that she had tried to get between the quarrelling couple when Lambert accidently hit her by mistake. Lambert arrived in Finland on Monday, Dec. 19 to celebrate Christmas with Koskinen. There had been much internet speculation that Lambert was scheduled to be a guest performer on Thursday's finale of the X Factor. A show spokesperson denied the booking and clearly, being 5,100 miles and a continent away, a Lambert appearance was not in the cards. It's unclear when he'll return to the U.S. or whether he'll face charges in Finland. Lambert's new single, “Better Than I Know Myself," was released on Tuesday. The singer last tweeted on Wednesday at around noon Helsinki time boasting that the song was No. 2 on iTunes in the Middle East. He had earlier written in Finnish, “Helsinki is a beautiful city full of beautiful people! Thank you!” UPDATED: Investigator Juvonen has completed his interrogation and the two were released on Thursday afternoon. Koskinen later blogged about the incident, writing in Finnish (as translated by Google): “Celebrities are people too and fame is not easy. Love is not always easy either, but it’s forever.” Koskinen goes on to say that the “hangover is gone already” and “Paparazzi, police stations have back doors, too, go away already.” [From The Hollywood Reporter] It sounds like Adam had too much to drink and he started getting aggressive and pissy and… not good. If this was a heterosexual couple, would we feel differently? Because this seems like something out of the Charlie Sheen playbook. Does Glambert have issues with violence? Is he abusing his (much smaller) boyfriend? Is Adam a violent drunk? Photos courtesy of WENN.

Paris Hilton covers Vanity Fair Spain: sadly nostalgic or just hideous? Posted: 22 Dec 2011 06:09 AM PST Here is Paris Hilton's cover for the January issue of Vanity Fair Spain. I don't get it either. Why Paris? Why VF Spain? Why this cover image which looks like a turd wrapped in beige and dipped in imitation gold? Not that I feel like Paris deserves some incredible magazine styling, but even I could have done something better than this. The makeup is terrible, her hair looks like a stiff wig, and the color scheme is awful. And her dog is all "JESUS CHRIST I can't believe this bitch is holding me." There's a behind-the scenes video too. Blah. Paris is just so thrilled that somebody is paying attention to her. It makes me kind of sad for her, and nostalgic for a different era in gossip. Paris's time is over, and what has replaced her? The Kardashians, Teen Moms, Bachelorettes, the Gosselins and random people just famous for who they boned. Are we better off, post-Paris? Here are some photos of Paris in Aspen, Colorado yesterday. No, I don't get the outfit either. But much like those photos of Mariah Carey, I kind of have to give Paris credit for being covered up in bulky clothing. The coat is absolutely hideous, and I want to rip that little pink cap off her head, though. Photos courtesy of VF Spain and Fame.

Tom Cruise gets called out as client of famous Brazilian plastic surgeon Posted: 22 Dec 2011 06:09 AM PST Here are even more photos of Tom Cruise papping himself with his family to promote MI4. The man is just … well, he doesn’t stop. I realize that he’s got a product to sell and has much at stake with this movie, and Kaiser described Tom’s attitude well in terms of “hustle,” but Tom really needs to take a break soon. I’m actually startng to worry about the little fella. It’s simply not healthy to run this hard for so long. Also, Tom should really think about disappearing for awhile after he finishes up this MI4 publicity blitz because the backlash is commencing in earnest and from more than just a gossip standpoint. Even Reuters has published an article (a really “amazing“ one) entitled “The Curse of Being Tom Cruise” that includes much of what we’ve already discussed here including a bit about those paid fans in Mumbai. Overall, it’s a pretty brutal take on Tom’s public persona and concludes that Tom’s fame is quickly approaching that of a reality star instead of an A-list movie actor. Now Hollywood Reporter has jumped in with a piece dedicated solely to the topic of Tom’s morphing face, which Kaiser, CB, and myself have already covered at great length. The HR article even discusses the Mail’s piece about Tom’s makeup fetish (which I referenced yesterday) and goes into detail about Tom’s secret professional relationship with a famous Brazilian plastic surgeon: Tom Cruise, 49, is looking eerily younger than ever. Which leads us to surmise that A. he’s getting some help or B. he’s got a scary portrait in his attic. The actor — who turns 50 on July 3, 2012, — has looked particularly fresh-faced as he promotes his new movie Mission: Impossible — Ghost Protocol So what’s his secret? According to the Brazilian mag EPOCA, Cruise has had meetings with world famous Brazilian plastic surgeon Dr. Ivo Pitanguy. Cruise even invited the good doctor to the 2009 Rio premiere of Knight and Day. And on that same trip, Cruise, wife Katie Holmes and daughter Suri, were photographed having a lunch at Pitanguy’s private island in Brazil’s Bay of Kings. British tabs are already reporting that Cruise has become more concerned with his skin, even using his wife’s creams. Since Dr. Pitanguy’s skin care line, Beauty By Clinica Ivo Pitanguy, is also available at U.S department stores such as Berdorf Goodman, Cruise could indeed be slathering on his friend’s pricey goop. The New York Times has already lauded Pitanguy’s new “It” Cream, the Restoring Formula in his PreVious skin care line. The cost: $300 for 1.7 ounces. Pitanguy is credited with triggering Brazil’s obsession with plastic surgery. He’s allegedly worked on Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Persian Empress Farah Diba, French president Francois Mitterrand and Frank Sinatra. A jet-setting multi-lingual Renaissance man, Ivo is also friends with Carla Bruni, the First Lady of France, Michael Caine and the late Salvador Dalí and Audrey Hepburn, The Times also profiled the good doctor, whose scapel has been said to be “guided by heaven.” Another aging celebrity we’re keeping a close eye on is Rolling Stone Mick Jagger. Our sources say he’s now using his girlfriend L’Wren Scott’s magical skin potions from Dr. David Colbert, including Colbert’s Intensify Facial Discs, Stimulating Serum, Nutrify and Protect Day Dream and Heal and Soothe Night Cream, available at Bergdorf Goodman, Neiman Marcus and on his website. If Dr. Colbert’s products can make a difference in Mick’s 68-year-old weathered face, we’re buying this stuff in bulk. And how many Frequent Flyer miles does it take to get to Brazil? [From Hollywood Reporter] A plastic surgeon who’s allegedly “guided by Heaven” doesn’t sound like he falls in line with the tenets of Scientology, right? Then again, the usual CO$ rules don’t necessarily apply to Tom. But yes, I totally buy that Katie and Suri were wined and dined while Tom was nipped and tucked. Tom also appeared on “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon” to talk more about the MI4 stunts. Fallon’s praise was so effusive that I thought the poor guy was going to wet his pants in excitement, and when he called Tom a “manly man,” you could visibly see Tom’s feathers fluff right up. It was a lot like the final act of Black Swan. Anyway, Fallon totally beat Tom in a wreath-throwing contest too, and I bet it secretly killed Tom not to be the very best at something: Meanwhile, here’s a photo of Katie stepping out alone on Tuesday evening (even robots need some breathing room) to check out the Broadway production of The Cherry Orchard, which sort of irks me because I adore Anton Chekov and even chose my daughter’s middle name based upon a character in that very play. Katie couldn’t possibly understand. Later, Katie stepped out with Suri and Tom (photographed separately below) for yet another late night: Suri, in an unusual gesture, seemed perfectly happy to interact with the paps: Finally, here’s Tom walking by his lonesome behind Katie and Suri, which is strange because he usually likes to be front and center: Photos courtesy of Fame

Adele to cover March issue of US Vogue, having plus-sized clothes specially made Posted: 22 Dec 2011 05:35 AM PST Adele tweeted the above photo a few days ago with the caption, "Back on the grind. Hair and make up did. Merry Christmas! Axx." It's thought that Adele was having her hair and makeup done for a big photo shoot. Possibly with… American Vogue! OMG! Is Anna Wintour smoking crack over there? First she puts certified oldie Meryl Streep on the cover, and now Adele?!? Adele is deserving of a cover, of course. She was deserving of a cover months and months ago, but Wintour was too busy promoting Rihanna and Lady Gaga. Meanwhile, Adele's 21 is one of the best selling albums of 2011, and everyone is in love with her. So finally, Wintour got with the program. Unfortunately, Adele is allegedly having her Vogue pictorial clothes specially made. Because, you see, she's not a sample size, and the fashion world has absolutely NO IDEA what to do if a girl dares to be larger than a size 2. So Wintour had to personally ask designers to make some clothes for Adele. Curvaceous singer Adele is in line to hit the fashion jackpot if rumours she is to appear on the cover of US Vogue are true. Having already graced the cover of the British edition in September, WWD report the soulful star will hit American newsstands for the coveted March 2012 issue. Second only to the famed September issue, the Spring edition is the most important in the Vogue calender and featuring a fuller-figured star marks a courageous move by the fashion magazine. The last time a plus-sized star graced the cover of US Vogue was Jennifer Hudson back in 2007. Editor Anna Wintour is said to have asked a host of designers to come up with a series of cover-worthy outfits for the size 16 chart-topper to wear on the shoot. Although we do hope Adele will get to show them off on the cover as her appearance on the UK edition was closely cropped to just her head and shoulders. With six Grammy nominations and the best-selling album of 2011, 21, under her belt the talented 23-year-old also seems to be carving out a career as a style icon too. The signing by the American magazine is the latest in an ever-increasing list of cover shoots for Adele who has also featured on the front of Cosmopolitan and The Gentlewoman, proving that the more voluptuous figure sells as well as the usual stick-thin models and celebrities. According to reports Taylor Swift was in line to fill the esteemed fashion spot but has been moved to the February issue instead. Another surprising star to feature on the January cover of US Vogue was Meryl Streep, who at 62 is the oldest person to grace the cover in the magazine’s history. [From The Mail] I believe that the March issue is the annual "Power Issue" correct? I think so. Which I could see for Adele – she's totally one of the most powerful women in music these days. By the way, Adele is still recovering from her throat surgery to repair her damaged vocal chords. That's why she kind of looks like crap in the header photo – well, not like crap, but she just looks tired and kind of sickly. Apparently, her surgery went well, but Adele is still going to take a big break – she recently said that she has no plans to record a new album anytime soon. Here are some shots from Adele's Vogue UK pictorial earlier this year: Photos via Adele's Twitter, Vogue UK.

Review of ‘The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo’: must see or must miss? Posted: 22 Dec 2011 04:26 AM PST *Note: The first part of this review is (relatively) spoiler-free, but I'll include some spoilers at the end. First off, I should admit at the beginning that I'm a fan of the Millennium trilogy, the three books that Stieg Larsson wrote before his death in 2004. The books have their faults, of course, but the heart of the series was a completely unique, fascinating, well-drawn, and unconventional heroine. I've seen the Swedish films as well, the ones starring Noomi Rapace and Michael Nyqvist, and they're decent-to-good adaptations of Larsson's work. My favorite book and my favorite Swedish film apaptation is still the first one, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. I know the Swedish films are often criticized, but I think the Swedish GWTDT film is excellent, and it stands up. So, given my love of the Swedish film, I was already primed to be extra-judgy of David Fincher's Americanized adaptation. Plus, I've grown to dislike Rooney Mara a little bit, considering her interviews are revealing the little fact that she's kind of dumb and conceited. But I have to say… there was a lot in Fincher's film that I really liked. The basic story is… well, there's nothing basic. Calling it a "Whodunit" or a murder mystery isn't the whole plot, but in its essence, yes, it is a murder mystery. Rooney Mara plays Lisbeth Salander, a young woman who is misanthropic, a legal ward of the state, who may or may not have mental issues and violent tendencies. She's blunt, she's honest, she's supposed to look very young and androgynous, and she's supposed to radiate intelligence. Daniel Craig plays Mikael Blomkvist, one of Sweden's most respected and controversial journalists, who just got his ass handed to him in a libel case. So, how did Daniel and Rooney do? Rooney was much better than I was expecting. She had the look of a haunted child, and she often looked frighteningly small and vulnerable. Her accent work was stellar – I never heard anything resembling an American accent. But! I still prefer Noomi Rapace's Lisbeth, honestly. When Lisbeth is in danger, Noomi let you feel her terror and helplessness, and it was devastating. When Lisbeth is angry, Noomi projected the shaking, all-consuming rage. Rooney just… didn't. Her performance wasn't as powerful, but it was still pretty solid. As for Daniel as Mikael… he was good. The Mikael character is at his best when he's playing off the women in his life, and Daniel definitely came alive in his scenes with Robin Wright and Rooney. There were moments where Daniel seemed less like a journalist in over his head and more like a supremely competent British spy, though. Daniel just seems too… capable. But he was good, and at the end of the day, he's lovely to look at, and he brought more emotional depth to Blomkvist than Nyqvist did. My biggest problem with the film was David Fincher's direction, and whoever edited it. The pacing was completely off in the first 15 minutes – I knew what was happening in the story, but even I was like, "WTF is happening here? Why are they introducing that character right now?" Then, in the final big action/suspense sequence, the whole thing was just a f–king mess. What could have been a series of gradually terrifying scenes were completely c–kblocked by bad pacing, bad editing and several sequences that should have been cut out of the script in the first week of preproduction. And then after that, the movie just hung around for another half an hour while they wrapped up the additional plotlines. Those plotlines had to be dealt with, of course, but Fincher really took his time and it got slightly boring. So… I'm recommending the film, but I also think you guys should totally try the Swedish film, just because it really is a much, much better film overall. Seriously. ************SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS **************** *Fincher messed with the story line in some little ways that I didn't mind at all. Like, he introduced a cat to the little cottage where Blomkvist is staying, and g–damn if that cat didn't steal all of Daniel's scenes. At one point, Blomkvist is asleep in bed, and the cat is sleeping on his head. That was my favorite part. UPDATE: Er, was there a cat in the book? I completely forgot about it. Sorry! *Some of you are probably wondering about the pivotal rape scene. In the Swedish film, the violence is traumatizing to the viewer, and you can really feel Lisbeth's helplessness, her terror, her inability to fight back. The scene is so powerful, that act of violence haunts the rest of the film, and the rest of the series. The scene in this film was… well, it's still violent and disturbing, but it was nowhere near as traumatic as the Swedish version. *It takes FOREVER for Lisbeth and Mikael to finally get to work together, and even then, the story keeps separating them. It pissed me off – we waited for so long to see lots of scenes with Mikael and Lisbeth in the cottage, and you barely get any payoff. *Lisbeth's control over her own destiny was subtly taken away from book to screen. In the books, she makes several pivotal decisions that influence future plotlines. In the American film, those decisions are made by other characters – and things happen TO her, and she does less to affect her own course of action. Promotional images courtesy of Columbia Pictures/IMDB and Empire Magazine.

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