Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Crushable

Crushable


An Outsider's Perspective on 'The Bachelor'

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 11:12 AM PST

I must confess: I have never seen The Bachelor.

I know this is shocking given my trashy taste in TV, which runs the intellectually-challenging gamut of Jerseylicious to Jersey Couture to Jersey Shore. Somehow, I never got into The Bachelor. I think it might be because I tend to prefer reality shows in which absolutely nothing happens, instead of there being a competition and then an elimination; it’s why I prefer The Real World to The Real World/Road Rules Challenge. So, Lilit and I thought it would be funny to gain an outsider’s (my) perspective on the show, which is on its 15th season. Here are my thoughts on the special addition of The Bachelor: The Women Tell All:

  • Holy spray tan and sweet blonde facial hair, Brad. He looks like a friendly, panting golden retriever. And he also looks like the poor man’s Doug Reinhardt.
  • Right off the bat, you have to have reservations about someone named Shawntel.
  • It’s ok if he calls you Ashley H. on the show (I’m assuming there’s another Ashley), but if he calls you Ashley H. in bed, you have a serious problem on your hands.
  • WTF – are those really Madison’s teeth or is she wearing fangs? There’s a new generation of Trekkies and they’re taking the Twilight thing a little too far.
  • What does it mean to get a rose? Is it like a notch on the bedpost? Or is it signifying that you get a special date with Brad?
  • THERE ARE OVER 500 FORMER THE BACHELOR CAST-MATES?! Somehow, all these D-list celebs have eluded me all these years. And this coming from a person who watches reality TV almost exclusively.
  • Wait… is “the bachelor pad” the name of The Bachelor’s spin-off? Or is that where everyone lives during taping?
  • What a random array of professions. I guess there are lunatics in every field.
  • I wonder how many threesomes or foursomes have happened in the house.
  • Ok, Michelle, how do you not know how you got a black eye? She looks like Maria Menounos and Olivia Palermo, but reminds me of Carrie.
  • FYI: It looks desperate if you say the reason you’ll stay, instead of someone else, is because “the Lord knows better.”
  • Melissa looks like a lizard.
  • What nationality is Ashley H?
  • Wait, let me get this straight: Michelle has a daughter?! That she left at home?! Maybe if she repeated it a few more times, I would understand.
  • Ashley S. has the weirdest voice.
  • Again, what’s with the fucking roses?
  • Wow, Ashley H.’s hair definitely looks better darker and with bangs.
  • Why would they have this show before it’s announced who he chose?

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An Outsider's Perspective on 'The Bachelor'

Sex on the Wire: Amanda Seyfried's More Than A Mean Girl... She's Now Ryan Phillipe's Girlfriend

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 11:08 AM PST

Amanda SeyfriedAmanda Seyfried talks about her new relationship with Ryan Phillipe and her past heartbreak with Dominic Cooper. (People)

A conservative columnist claims that monogamous sex is best for society. (The Frisky)

New research suggests that having a deluded view of your husband or wife means you’re more likely to have a successful marriage. (Boston)

Dancing with the Stars judge, Carrie Ann Inaba, is getting married to her much-younger boyfriend this summer. (Us Magazine)

More great news: 50% percent of men may have HPV. (YourTango)

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Sex on the Wire: Amanda Seyfried's More Than A Mean Girl... She's Now Ryan Phillipe's Girlfriend

The Daily WTF: A Round Of Barbie Foosball?

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 10:50 AM PST

For just $25,000 at FAO Schwartz, this immensely creepy Barbie foosball board could be yours! (Or we suppose you could probably make one yourself for like $200 and that old box in your little sister’s closet.) Gooooal!

(via BuzzFeed)

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The Daily WTF: A Round Of Barbie Foosball?

Crushable Quotable: Topher Grace Thinks Hollywood Is Bad At Sex

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 10:40 AM PST

Nerve’s “Sex Advice From” column is one of our favorite things on the Internet, because: sex! And sometimes famous people! The latest celeb to do the column is Topher Grace, whose new flick Take Me Home Tonight opened this week. However, Topher went the route less traveled and spent most of his interview talking about why he shouldn’t be giving sex advice. And it’s because he’s an actor, and actors are terrible at everything:

“Let me say this: all Hollywood celebrities are all divorced within five or six years of getting married — or within three days of getting married — and they're all in and out of relationships all the time, right? So, begin by stop writing in to celebrities for dating advice. You should spend more time thinking about what her likes and dislikes are and less time writing in to ask celebrities what they think you should do.”

Words to live be? We hope not, because then we’d be out of a job.

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Crushable Quotable: Topher Grace Thinks Hollywood Is Bad At Sex

Life Lessons From 'Skins': If You Have Large Breasts People Will Let You Do Grown-Up Things

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 09:48 AM PST

Last night's episode of Skins centered on Daisy, the Filipina trumpet player with a heart of gold. We first see Daisy at her after-school job, where she works as a waitress in a Hooters-style hot chick restaurant where the hamburgers are almost as stacked as the tank tops. We imagine you’d probably have to be 18 for that, no? Alas, not in the world of Skins, where age ain’t nothing but a demo. The tips are good, Daisy says with a grimace, but nobody’s looking at her face.

Next, we see Daisy’s shitty home life (another given in the Skins universe). Daisy lives with her look-alike sister (played by the same actress, we think?) and her totally mean father, an ex-musician who’s been devastated by the recent walk-out of his wife. After fighting with her fam, Daisy sneaks out at night and hits the local jazz club where she performs to a delighted and boozy crowd. Again, normally an adult activity, but this is MTV.

Interspersed with drama related to pop not wanting his daughter to go music school, Daisy concocts a plan to have meaningless sex with her pal Aboud — once more, not something high school students are typically super good at, that whole dramaless sex thing. But did we mention the breasts?

This week’s Skins related Life Lesson: Stuff your bra and people will treat you like a real, live adult. Alternately: Wear something loose and get into the zoo for free.

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Life Lessons From 'Skins': If You Have Large Breasts People Will Let You Do Grown-Up Things

The Real Housewives of New York City Analyze 'Bethenny Ever After' Episode 2

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 09:35 AM PST

The Real Housewives of New York City (which premieres April 7!) are back to analyze episode two of Bethenny Ever After. In this week’s episode, Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy go to an Us Weekly party, surprise Bethenny’s assistant Julie with a makeover, and go on a hot date that gets intense when Bethenny tells Jason what she’s been talking about with her therapist. Get to hear what the Jill ZarinRamona Singer, Kelly Killoren Bensimon, Countess LuAnn de Lesseps, and Sonja Morgan have to say on fashion, food, family and more.

  • Bethenny Gets Ready for the Us Weekly 25 Most Stylish New Yorkers Party
  • Bethenny and Jason Scarf Down Burgers
  • Bethenny and Jason Have a Night on the Town Sans Baby
  • Hot Rachael Ray Producer Visits Bethenny's Apartment
  • Bethenny Surprises Julie with a Makeover
  • Bethenny Changes Bryn in the Smallest Bathroom Ever
  • Jason and Bethenny Role-Play
  • Jason and Bethenny Have a Tense Conversation on their Date

(Photos via Bravo)

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The Real Housewives of New York City Analyze 'Bethenny Ever After' Episode 2

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 09:27 AM PST

Magicians fight Nazis in new HBO series Hobgoblin – Not surprising that this awesome project comes from Michael Chabon, whose 2001 novel The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay targeted Hitler through 1930s comic books. Wife Ayelet Waldman (Bad Mother) joins Chabon in developing the series. (Entertainment Weekly)

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What Was the Word That Got Bleeped from 'Jersey Shore' Last Week?

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 09:20 AM PST

On last week’s episode of Jersey Shore, the housemates’ toilet troubles continued. A plumber came to the house and discovered that someone had tried to flush a T-shirt down the toilet, which caused the initial problem. When JWoww and Snooki saw the shirt, the word they used to refer to it got bleeped. What could possibly be so offensive about a shirt?

According to some internet commenters, the word that was bleeped was “Dago,” which Urban Dictionary defines as “a highly offensive racial slur for Italians.” A “Dago Tee” is a nickname for a sleeveless T-shirt that is sometimes used in the Italian-American community. (You might also know it by its other offensive name, a wifebeater.) Others think that the word was “Guinea,” another Italian slur. Urban Dictionary says that a “guinea tee” is “a white, ribbed, sleevless [sic] tee-shirt” usually “worn by Guidos.”

I guess MTV is fine with showing close-up shots of toilets filled with poo, The Situation maybe snorting cocaine, Ronnie and Sammi’s borderline abusive relationship, plenty of infrared-camera bed antics, a dude punching Snooki in the face, and various cast members calling women sluts and whores, but a slur against Italian-Americans is totally not cool. That, despite the fact that this entire show is basically a slur against Italian-American people.

Post from: Crushable

What Was the Word That Got Bleeped from 'Jersey Shore' Last Week?

Gallery: The 34 Best Photos Of James Van Der Beek On The Occasion Of His 34th Birthday

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 08:37 AM PST

Happy 34th birthday to television and the Internet’s James Van Der Beek! We won’t lie to you, we’re probably the biggest Dawson’s Creek fans on the planet. In college, we actually made plans with a friend to write and direct an alternate version of the series finale — no joke! So it’s with great pleasure that we present this gallery of 34 amazing photos of our favorite actor-turned-meme.

  • Cool dance moves, bro!
  • Ohai.
  • I'm in a pool!
  • Romance.
  • Celeb game at Dodger stadium.
  • On-set.
  • Doing his best James Dean.
  • Varsity Blues style.
  • High school!
  • Lil James.
  • Puppy dog?
  • Wife #3?
  • ;)
  • Yikes!
  • DILF Jeans.
  • With baby Olivia.
  • Director JBV.
  • With Robin Sparkles.
  • Ke$ha video.
  • L.O.L.

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Gallery: The 34 Best Photos Of James Van Der Beek On The Occasion Of His 34th Birthday

Fan Service: Learning When to Let Go

Posted: 08 Mar 2011 10:50 AM PST

Fan Service is a semi-regular column I’ll be writing about fandom in mainstream media — anything from Gaga’s Little Monsters and Disney starlet worshippers on Twitter to older, established communities operating on Tumblr and LiveJournal.

The past 24 hours have seen an unprecedented backlash in the Firefly fan community, as Browncoats became split over the Help Nathan Buy Firefly movement. It’s strange how we got here, actually: A few weeks ago, EW announced that The Science Channel would air re-runs of Joss Whedon’s sci-fi western, which had a brief, 14-episode run on Fox in 2002 before it was cancelled. Then former star Nathan Fillion made an offhand comment that if he won the California Lottery he’d buy the show’s rights from Fox, fans took him at his word and set up Help Nathan Buy Firefly. Fillion quickly retracted his statement, but the ball had already started rolling.

Yesterday, the organizers unveiled “The Big Damn Plan,” an endeavor to buy the rights not for Fillion, but for themselves. The long message was enthusiastic… and very embarrassing. Cringeworthy to read, because I knew that they hadn’t lied about the hours of debate that had gone into this business plan, the commitments made, for something that was never going to hold water. The rhetoric was, honestly, difficult to read:

Now you're probably saying to yourself "that's crazy talk! Nathan said don't do it!"  We say: Nathan specifically told fans not to buy the rights for him, but he didn't say anything about fans buying the rights for themselves. Our team has discussed this at length, and though we're really cautious, we just plain feel its worth a shot – crowdfunding could be the way of the future for film.

…We've reached the tipping point.  We have to know if the the fans out there are in the foxhole with us.  We could come up with all the best laid plans in the world, but without the support of the people, they would all be for naught. This will take time, determination and patience from us all. But that time and energy could create an extremely powerful force, unlike anything before seen in Hollywood or around the world.

These fans seemed to be pushing forward blindly, unaware of the scope of what they were aiming for. And it was embarrassing because there were those of us — including proud Browncoats who gently argued in the extensive comment thread — who were able to get our heads above water and see that this wasn’t useful.

Ultimately, all it took was a tweet from Maurissa Tancharoen, Whedon’s sister-in-law, to stop the plan in its tracks: Guys, no one in the Whedonverse is in support of [HNBF]. Please save your money! Similar pleas came from others close to the fold:

Fillion’s original attempt to fix the situation: It’s beautiful to dream of more Firefly, but PLEASE DON’T SEND ANY MONEY. Just keep being great Browncoats, which you are!

Jane Espenson, who wrote for Buffy, Angel, and Firefly: I made a whimsical comment about #Firefly – if Joss revived the show, I’d help. But it’s not practical. Save your $ for #Avengers tix… [When asked why HNBF wasn't practical] Joss not avail. Few writers or cast members avail. Rights not for sale. Little interest from studios/networks. Other than that…

Last night, HNBF posted this message to its Facebook page: So, that’s a wrap. We’ll keep the site open as a memory for a bit and if any Whedons need to reach us, hit the button. It’s humiliating to see them concede defeat, even as I’m incredibly relieved that this short-lived craziness is over.

I can’t blame them; with the Internet bringing fan communities together, the ’00s saw many beloved series reinvigorated, creating actual precedent for these eager viewers, artists, and writers. When teen alien show Roswell was on the bubble in 2000, fans sent tiny Tabasco bottles — the characters’ condiment of choice — to WB exceutives and managed to get the show moved to a new timeslot, where it flourished for another two years. Jericho fans did the same with peanuts and CBS. Even Firefly got another chance, as the feature film Serenity. But it didn’t make enough money to warrant another film, and that was that.

These successes can make fans feel pretty heady, that they have power and their beloved series is invincible. However, a downside (and often negative portrayal) of fandom is of people who get so wrapped up in their show that they dispense with all common sense. Successes like the ones I mentioned must be taken with a huge grain of salt, and fans need to be able to differentiate between legitimate campaign and fever dream. Often, in lieu of the show itself returning, these online communities, with fanfiction and intense discussions and cosplay, have to be enough.

Post from: Crushable

Fan Service: Learning When to Let Go

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