Cele|bitchy |
- Diane Kruger versus Tilda Swinton: who looks better in Cannes?
- Kris Jenner denies that her giant lips were from a procedure: “It’s really crazy”
- Duchess Kate “styles herself single-handedly,” does her own shopping, hair & makeup
- Rob Pattinson demanded that nipple-licking pics be removed from shoot: diva?
- Kristen Stewart in red Derek Lam for ‘SWATH’ photo call: improved & appropriate?
- Jennifer Aniston’s latest Smart Water ads: ridiculously Photoshopped or just cute?
- Charlize Theron: “I hate actors who quote Nietzsche, I don’t like pretentious s–t”
- Tom Cruise as serious rock star in full W mag shoot: embarrassing or cool?
- Elizabeth Banks: “Men love a second income, they want their wives to work”
- Angelina Jolie’s foreword to Billy Bob Thornton’s memoir: “He has an unmatchable wit”
Diane Kruger versus Tilda Swinton: who looks better in Cannes? Posted: 16 May 2012 08:51 AM PDT These are some of the first photo sets out of the Cannes Film Festival, which opens today. Did you know that Ewan McGregor, Diane Kruger and Jean-Paul Gaultier are all judges on the festival jury this year? True story. These are some pics from the "jury photo call" earlier today. Diane wore Versus and Jimmy Choo heels, and I'm not crazy about either. I mean, I love Diane. I think she's so beautiful and she can wear different kinds of styles and you can just tell that she loves fashion. But this dress doesn't look comfortable and I hate the shoes with the dress. By the way, while I've got your attention – the next week and a half will be full of lots of Kruger and McGregor photos – should we cover every fashion moment, every glance? My general thoughts: we should wait until Diane wears something spectacular, because otherwise we'll get Kruger'd out. Also: what's the over-under on Diane and Ewan having a torrid Cannes affair? Slim? Second photo set: the photo call for Wes Anderson's new film, Moonrise Kingdom. While I have my doubts about Wes Anderson's general vibe as a writer/director, I do think the man has a gift for putting interesting actors together in the same film. This film stars Bruce Willis, Bill Murray and TILDA SWINTON!!! And they all look adorable and amazing. I think Bill and Tilda are probably from the same alien colony. Oh, and I LOVE Tilda's outfit and her crazy sunglasses. YAY! |
Kris Jenner denies that her giant lips were from a procedure: “It’s really crazy” Posted: 16 May 2012 08:24 AM PDT
Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy As you may know, Kris Jenner was on The Today Show this morning, getting very mildly grilled by Matt Lauer, who asked her some sort-of difficult questions but didn’t bother to follow up at all. As Kaiser mentioned in her story on Khloe, one of the main plot points to the upcoming seventh season of “Keeping Up With The Kardashians” is a DNA test that Khloe undergoes. The test only confirms that Khloe is Kris’ biological daughter and doesn’t even compare her DNA to either Kim or Kourteney’s to see if they have the same father. So it’s a kind of DNA copout, and when Kris assures Matt that the late Robert Kardashian is Khloe’s father we have to take her at her word. We all know how much that is worth. Kris also spends some time refuting rumors about her and her family. She denies that her daughters have fired her as their momager, although Khloe did say she had considered it. Kris goes on to blow smoke about how she’s able to be both a manager and “take that hat off” and play mom when she has to. She also denies that Lamar and Khloe are having problems in their marriage (which I believe, actually. They seem solid to me) and denies that their reality show is canceled, which Khloe has said before. As for Kris’ ridiculous fat lip in the promos for the show, she says it’s real but she gave no further information about it. “Actually, no cosmetic procedure whatsoever. I woke up, and you have to tune in because it’s unbelievable. It’s really crazy what happened, we’re still trying to figure it out. so.” Yeah, we have to watch the show to see her blow some more smoke, this time with giant puffed up lips. What a cop out. I bet they’re prosthetic and she concocts some story to explain them. On Kim and Kanye’s relationship, she won’t comment. Here’s more:
[From The Clicker] Oh and Kris claims at the end that when she saw Kim’s photoshoot with short cropped hair she really thought that it was a photoshoot that she did and forgot about. She says, in all seriousness, “That came up on my computer and I went, ‘where did I get that outfit?’ and then I realized that’s not me.” This lady is unbelievable. Photo credit: Fame and Pacific Coast News |
Duchess Kate “styles herself single-handedly,” does her own shopping, hair & makeup Posted: 16 May 2012 08:19 AM PDT I've discussed this before, or maybe alluded to it in previous posts, but I really, really wonder what Duchess Kate and Prince William's sex life is like. As much as I'd like to think they have a great physical bond, I tend to think both of them have the "sexiness" of wet noodles. William seems rather stiff (not in a good way) and more and more like his "prim" father. As for Kate… well, I do think she's very pretty, and she's good at working her assets (her hair, her legs, her buttons, her raccoon eyes). But does she really have any sex appeal? Not really. So I'm not really sure how People Magazine got to their "Sexy New Kate!" headline. Still, isn't it kind of hilarious that Kate got a People Magazine cover simply because she – at long last – pulled her hair out of her face? That's basically what just happened. Anyway, here's People's online excerpt.
"She’s doing it single-handedly, too. Kate does her own makeup and doesn’t have an official stylist, according to palace sources." Bullsh-t, palace sources. Yes, I think Kate does her own makeup most of the time – which explains the eyeliner problem, which she's obviously still in denial about. But she's not styling herself alone. She has dressers and hair people. It's not wrong for her to have those people, as I've always said. She's a duchess/princess. She needs people around her, helping her. But don't lie to us and promote this royal propaganda that she's doing this all by herself because she's so accessible. Oh, and I still think that Kate only wore her hair up last Friday because The Mail – a long favorite for Middleton "exclusives" – called her out on the continuous college-girl sausage curls. But sure – wearing an elegant up-do for formal, evening occasions is now "sexy" and "new" (rather than completely reasonable and expected). |
Rob Pattinson demanded that nipple-licking pics be removed from shoot: diva? Posted: 16 May 2012 08:05 AM PDT This is a really weird story, but Robert Pattinson has reportedly pulled the ferquing diva card about his nipples during his recent shoot with Premiere magazine. That is, Rob was fine with having a female model grope him while the camera clicked away but allegedly drew the line when the photographer instructed the young lady to start licking his nipples. The shoot in question contains the set of photos that functioned as a homage to the works of David Cronenberg, and Rob was totally fine with the surreal, weird, violent vibe but couldn’t handle some random chick’s saliva on his nips. Perhaps he could have asked Tom Cruise for some guidance on how to enjoy an implied beej with an air of detachment? Or not. Anyway, some people are really implying that Rob is a diva over this mess, and it’s rather amusing that such a huge deal is being made over nothing. After all, Rob once famously endured a 12-hour Details shoot with assorted naked models and then went onto joke about how he was “allergic to v-gina.” So just leave him alone about his nipples, alright? Here’s the scoop from Radar Online:
[From Radar Online] It’s a photoshoot, sure. It means nothing. But still, I wouldn’t even want the hottest dude licking my nipples for all the world to see. Some people would argue that it’s different for guys because nipples aren’t so taboo, but this chick was actually placing her bodily fluids on them. That probably made Rob feel uncomfortable even if he wasn’t the f–cking boyfriend of Kristen Stewart. Also, some guys have really sensitive nipples, and others don’t. Maybe Rob is of the former camp, and he didn’t want to have photographic evidence of his genuine arousal floating around for all of posterity. If it was a Terry Richardson shoot, maybe he should expect it, but this was for a feature in the fairly well-respected Premiere magazine. Bottom line — Rob’s nipples, Rob’s right to be a diva about them. Photos courtesy of Premiere |
Kristen Stewart in red Derek Lam for ‘SWATH’ photo call: improved & appropriate? Posted: 16 May 2012 07:44 AM PDT I know we've got a lot of Kristen Stewart and Charlize Theron news today, but in my defense, there are lots of new photos, interviews and gossip. And they are promoting the hell out of Snow White & the Huntsman… because both Charlize and Kristen have a lot riding on this movie. Both of them need SWATH to be a big hit. Will it be a big hit? I think it will make a lot of money, but it won't be like an Avengers or Hunger Games-style mega-hit. Anyway, as I mentioned in the earlier K-Stew post, Kristen, Charlize and some of the SWATH people headed to Germany yesterday after the UK swing of the press tour. I had hoped that the Berlin premiere would be held last night, but it looks like it's going to be tonight. These are photos from the (day-time) SWATH photo call. First thought: I like that Charlize and Kristen don't look like they've (badly) coordinated their looks like they did at the London premiere. Apparently, Kristen's dress is 10 Crosby by Derek Lam. Still not wearing Balenciaga, I see. Still, this Lam is a big improvement over the Marchesa hideousness. I'm not really in love with the whole look, but Kristen looks presentable and interesting, which is an accomplishment. Oh, and the belt is Alexander McQueen. I feel like Charlize might have given her the belt. As for Charlize's outfit – I don't know. If anyone has the designer ID, please share it. I think Charlize looks nice and appropriate here – and I buy that she probably had this outfit in her closet already, you know? I'm also including a photo of Sam Clafin, "the prince" of SWATH. He's kind of meh. He and Kristen look like siblings. |
Jennifer Aniston’s latest Smart Water ads: ridiculously Photoshopped or just cute? Posted: 16 May 2012 04:32 AM PDT Jennifer Aniston is still the face of SmartWater. Us Weekly says that this is her "second" year as the face of the Glaceau brand, but I seem to remember her getting the contract… maybe back in 2009? That's when her ad campaign seemed to have begun as well, which means this is her fourth year as the face of the brand. I seem to remember hearing that Aniston wasn't just getting a standard payment for her modeling – she also gets stock in the company? Which is smart, especially because Aniston and SmartWater are such a great, compatible "fit" together – people associate her with exercise and gyms and eating healthy, so she works well with a bottled water brand. Anyway, these are the two new print ads. Almost all of them have been done in black-and-white, and the Photoshop quality usually varies to either extreme. There were some memorable ads two years ago where the Photoshop wizards made Aniston's nose ridiculously upturned, like a snout. She's usually scantily-clad too. So how do these ads stack up? Eh. The photo where she's wearing the black t-shirt – that one is okay. I mean, it looks really retouched, but it still looks like HER. But the one with light-colored, half-buttoned blouse? It looks like they morphed her face with someone else. And her lips look kind of crazy in that one too. Last year she also did a commercial for the brand, although I think it was more of a would-be viral video that rarely (if ever) aired on TV. I wonder if she'll do a commercial this year? |
Charlize Theron: “I hate actors who quote Nietzsche, I don’t like pretentious s–t” Posted: 16 May 2012 04:20 AM PDT Charlize Theron is the cover girl for the June issue of InStyle Magazine (US). She's also on the cover of the Australian magazine Madison – I'm including the cover image at the end of the post. I really like Charlize's InStyle cover shoot, for what it's worth. Charlize has been churning out some really great photo shoots lately, but usually InStyle's pictorials aren't this… fierce…? Is that the right word? In any case, Charlize looks gorgeous. As you know, she's promoting Snow White and the Huntsman AND Prometheus, both out in June. And she has no problems talking about babies and boys and she even comes close to claiming that she hasn't had any work done – do you believe her? Hm… anyway, here are some highlights from both InStyle and Madison:
[Excerpts via the NY Post, Become Gorgeous and The Gossip Girls] I love her diatribe against pretension. I want to know if she's directing that at a specific actor. Who has she worked with recently? Michael Fassbender. Uh, no, not pretentious. He probably buys the first round for the crew. Idris Elba? God, I hope not. Noomi Rapace? From what I hear, Noomi's pretty low-key and sweet. Kristen Stewart? Hmm. Charlize seems to like her. Chris Hemsworth? Doubtful. Damn, I want to know who she's calling out!! As for her statement about marriage – I believe her. I don't think she's one of those "Oh, I don't want to get married unless you've got an engagement ring YES A MILLION TIMES YES!!!" women. I think Charlize's marriage apathy is for real. And I do think it has a lot to do with her mom and dad's situation. |
Tom Cruise as serious rock star in full W mag shoot: embarrassing or cool? Posted: 16 May 2012 04:16 AM PDT Last week, we brought you W magazine’s disturbing June cover that featured a tatted, shirtless Tom Cruise (as Stacee Jaxx in Rock of Ages) flanked by a couple of blonde groupies. Some of you thought that Tom looked hot, but most of you agreed that he just looked gross. Now the rest of the ill-advised photoshoot has been released by W mag, and it is almost sadly hilarious to witness. Because Toms’s a cowboy. On a steel horse he rides. Check out these abdominal muscles, and we’ll discuss. Kaiser, CB, and I were discussing this shoot, and we were primarily trying to figure out what’s going on with Tom’s abs. CB wondered if he got some of those implanted fake washboard abs similar to (but more subtle than) those of a recent Celebrity Big Brother contestant or if Tom’s just been heavily photoshopped because he doesn’t look real. Kaiser brought up Tom’s late 2010 shirtless candid photos on the set of MI4 where his stomach was all lumpy like he had some bad lipo. Personally, I think it’s a combo of some funky lipo coupled with a spray-tanned six pack and a hefty dose of Photoshop as well. Sort of how Robert Pattinson had to have his six-pack painted on for his shirtless scenes in New Moon. Only Tom has to take everything to extremes, so he has to have the best little spray-tanned abs available. As a result, he looks like a freak. Oh and the cover shot groupies are also present in the photo spread as well. Their shots are mostly NSFW because one of the models whipped out a boob for both of her shots, including this one, which I cropped so that all you can see is the implied beej being offered to a very uninterested Tom. Now let’s get onto the interview, which explains a lot about why Tom’s version of Stacee Jaxx seems far too serious in both trailers. It seems that Tom wanted his version of Stacee to be straightforward and different than the character from the Broadway musical. What a disaster in the making, and I can’t believe director Adam Shankman didn’t shut that notion down. Even W points out that Tom’s the only one in the movie that seems to not be playing their role with a few winks to the camera. Here are some excerpts from Tom’s interview:
[From W magazine] So it was Tom who insisted on a monkey named Hey Man? I don’t even know what to do with that except to add that to the evidence pile. I’ve already stated my belief that Tom is trying far too hard in this role, and he’s taking his portrayal of Stacee far too seriously to match the mood of the movie. Kaiser adds that Tom is playing it far “too earnest” because the character demands some “humor and irony.” Unfortunately, I don’t think that Tom even acknowledges the existence of irony. He insists upon simply playing every character straight, or he doesn’t take the role at all. Perhaps “straight” is a bad way to describe Tom’s acting method, but you catch my drift. Here’s more of the atrocious W photo shoot, and you can see the rest at the W site. Notice how Tom is posing with an empty (?) bottle of Jack Daniels because Scientologists don’t do liquor. Either that or it’s filled with barley water. Photos courtesy of W magazine |
Elizabeth Banks: “Men love a second income, they want their wives to work” Posted: 16 May 2012 04:13 AM PDT Judging solely by the cover image of the always-underrated and lovely Elizabeth Banks, I was prepared to love this cover shoot. Unfortunately, Allure used their prettiest photo of Banks for the June cover, and all of the other photos are awful. Like, she looks like a wax figure of a blow-up doll in the other shots. It's not cute. Still, we love Elizabeth, don't we? I'm not expecting many people to comment on her though. I've prepared myself for this to be one of the least commented-on posts of the day. You guys would rather rag on Kim Kardashian than show a cool lady like Elizabeth some love. Yes, that was a challenge. LOVE HER, damn it. As far as Elizabeth's cover interview… it's a bit hit-or-miss. I really love some of the stuff she says, especially about earning more money than her husband. But I feel like the language and terminology she uses to describe becoming a mother through surrogacy… well, it could use some work. It pains me to admit that, because I loved the initial statement she made about surrogacy. Here are some excerpts:
See? I like the part about out-earning her husband and how she knew that she was more talented than most of the men who out-earn her. It's interesting to think that right now, at the age of 38, Elizabeth has finally come into her own as an actress. Meaning that she toiled as a character actress and supporting player for more than a decade, and while she's probably still considered a "character actress," she's getting so much more attention these days because of What To Expect, The Hunger Games and 30 Rock. Her IMDB is insane – she works SO MUCH. God, I love her. |
Angelina Jolie’s foreword to Billy Bob Thornton’s memoir: “He has an unmatchable wit” Posted: 16 May 2012 04:13 AM PDT Earlier this year, some tabloid revealed this scandalous information: Angelina Jolie still gets along with her ex-husband, Bill Bob Thornton. She actually gets along with both of her exes, BBT and Jonny Lee Miller, by the way – JLM and his wife still come out to support Angelina's projects whenever they're all in the same city. Anyway, the tabloids were freaking out because BBT has written a memoir (-ish) and Angelina wrote the foreword to it. Soon after that news came out, the tabloids simply ran several stories claiming that OBVIOUSLY Angelina and BBT are still boning in their leathery sex shack because obviously. OBVS. Anyway, Life & Style has an early excerpt of just what Angelina says in the foreword:
[From Life & Style] It sounds like Angelina still has a great deal of affection for BBT, although… I do feel like she sounds rather removed, almost like she's eulogizing him rather than describing a living, breathing man who still exists in this world. Like, it seems like Billy Bob might be frozen in time for her, stuck permanently in 2001, and she barely knows the BBT of 2012. Anyway, that's just my armchair analysis. I don't think they're boning. I don't think Angelina is having any kind of sexual nostalgia. I think she's just being generous with a man whom she remembers fondly. |
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