The Superficial - Because You're Ugly

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• The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 5.16.12
• Courtney Stodden’s Bo Derek Bikini Photos
• There’s Probably A Kourtney Kardashian Sex Tape
• Elisabetta Canalis In A Bikini Will Kick Off Cannes
• Has Anyone Seen Nick Stahl?
• Miley Cyrus Takin’ Them Dang Ol’ Puppies Fer A Walk
• Reminder: Michael Fassbender Has A Giant Penis, Will Spank You With A Ping-Pong Paddle
• Paris Hilton Is.. Cleavagey? No, That’s Not Right, And Other News

The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 5.16.12 Posted: 16 May 2012 01:00 PM PDT Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where we embrace Hump Day as hard as these two probably did seconds after this picture was taken. To be clear, the implication is that they had gay sex. Anyway we’ve also got Suzanne Somers still selling Thighmasters, Chloe Sevigny working her corner and willing to cut a Read More ...

Courtney Stodden’s Bo Derek Bikini Photos Posted: 16 May 2012 11:26 AM PDT Like clockwork, here’s Courtney Stodden doing her best Bo Derek impression, and honestly, these are probably the best-looking shots of her since that set from before she discovered make-up, clear heels and sugar-daddying her way onto reality television. On that note, you really can’t help but marvel at America’s incredible capacity for making women think Read More ...

There’s Probably A Kourtney Kardashian Sex Tape Posted: 16 May 2012 10:38 AM PDT Dear God, please be recent… Apparently before he started dating Kourtney Kardashian, Patrick Bateman’s little brother Scott Disick and his buddies used to get chicks high and/or drunk off their ass, then film each other having sex with them for sport and/or to look at each others wieners. It’s a story rife with subtext. Life Read More ...

Elisabetta Canalis In A Bikini Will Kick Off Cannes Posted: 16 May 2012 09:36 AM PDT Here’s Elisabetta Canalis and Sacha Baron Cohen on a yacht in Cannes this morning to promote The Dictator and the funniest part is that one of the agencies actually listed Elisabetta as “supermodel Elisabetta Canalis.” Which is an amazing distinction for someone whose claim to fame is getting tossed off of George Clooney‘s penis for Read More ...

Has Anyone Seen Nick Stahl? Posted: 16 May 2012 08:32 AM PDT The last time Nick Stahl was in the news, he was arrested in March for not being able to pay a cabbie $84 – despite making $500,000 last year – and now comes word that he’s missing after spending a lot of time down on Skid Row. So basically the perfect recipe for a happy Read More ...

Miley Cyrus Takin’ Them Dang Ol’ Puppies Fer A Walk Posted: 16 May 2012 07:53 AM PDT Here’s a braless Miley Cyrus taking her new puppy for a walk in Miami yesterday while politely bending over for her fans and letting them look right down her shirt which is apparently every young girl with weight issues‘ dream come true. Here I just assumed it was dry-humping Robert Pattinson at a Cold Stone, Read More ...

Reminder: Michael Fassbender Has A Giant Penis, Will Spank You With A Ping-Pong Paddle Posted: 16 May 2012 07:03 AM PDT “Now, before we begin, how attached are you to your cervix?” Michael Fassbender is the cover interview for the June 2012 issue of GQ, so if you’re in the mood for reading about the trials and tribulations of everyone making jokes about how huge your penis is while the writer awkwardly tries not to make Read More ...

Paris Hilton Is.. Cleavagey? No, That’s Not Right, And Other News Posted: 16 May 2012 06:05 AM PDT - Which are hotter: Girls in jean shorts or girls in jean skirts? These are the questions that try the Internet’s soul. - Gwyneth Paltrow is nice to reporters during press junkets? Whaaa…. - The SyFy channel basically made a movie about sharks eating the cast of Jersey Shore. God bless, America. Read More ...

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