Cele|bitchy

Is Tom Cruise’s physical distance from Katie Holmes and Suri taking its toll?
Duchess Kate “vows to sleep on streets” (if streets are lined with eyeliner)
Ann Curry “wouldn’t even look at Matt Lauer” on her last day on ‘Today’
Donatella Versace: “Feminism is dead in the world, it comes from another time”
Rielle Hunter on CNN: “it surprises me how mean people are… it’s unfair”
Jennifer Aniston tells friends that “sex saved her relationship with Justin”
Miranda Kerr covers Bazaar UK, talks about giving birth without an epidural
Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen offer $17K fur handbag, PETA throws a hissy
Blake Lively’s dog had an “accident” at a photo shoot: bad dog or bad owner?
In Touch: Johnny Depp & Amber Heard “are not exclusive, are not serious”

Is Tom Cruise’s physical distance from Katie Holmes and Suri taking its toll?

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 09:01 AM PDT

Here are some photos of Katie Holmes with Suri Cruise in NYC on 6/25 after Suri got tired of walking, so Katie carried 6-year-old Suri for the rest of their walk. All I have to say about this (and without being too judgy) is that when my daughter was that age, my arms probably wouldn’t have carried her for more than a block at most. What does this tell us? Katie could totally beat Tom Cruise in an arm-wrestling match.

Another point of relevance to observe is that Katie and Tom have been spending a great deal of time apart from each other. While I’ve always assumed that Katie enjoyed her alone time away from the unhinged, lift wearing midget, she has been photographed quite recently looking very depressed. Further, Katie’s April walk of broken dreams poses the theory that not only is Katie bummed by Tom’s broken promises over her career, but she might also be disgruntled by his constant absence within she and Suri’s lives. Then Tom went solo (for whatever reason) to the Rock of Ages premiere. The official explanation is that Katie was in China for work-related reasons, but I’m not so sure that she wasn’t gone on purpose. You know, because he’s rarely ever there for her.

Now a new story from Star would have us believe that Tom’s extended and repeated time away from his girls is taking its toll not only upon his marriage but also Suri’s well being as well. The story, which seems to be based upon a photo of a tantrum on the part of Suri after Katie took away her ice cream cone, also states that Tom is scheduled to spend his 50th birthday in Iceland shooting Oblivion while his girls remain in NYC. From the way the story frames Tom’s statements on the subject, he comes off as pretty insensitive:

Tom Cruise has plans for his 50th birthday on July 3 — and they won’t involve party hats and blowing out candles with wife Katie Holmes, 33, and their 6-year-old daughter, Suri. Instead, he’ll be filming Oblivion in Iceland. “My family and I have an understanding on that matter,” explained Tom, who is currently starring in the hair-metal musical Rock of Ages. I have spent a lot of birthdays on set.”

But his absence seems to be taking a toll on the little girl and her mom, who caught the film Brave together on June 23 in NYC. “Suri misses her day,” says a family friend who points to the tyke’s recent public outbursts as evidence. She’s a different child when Tom’s around, explains the friend. “Suri was having a complete meltdown on a recent photo shoot for Katie until Tom stopped by unexpectedly. He picked her up and she was suddenly fine.”

[From Star, print edition, July 9, 2012]

Does Suri miss her dad while he’s away? Undoubtedly. Sure, the dude has to work, but it seems like a huge deal for him to be away on a milestone birthday. It’s hard to believe that he couldn’t negotiate with the producers for a few days to spend with family.

Meanwhile, The Mail is having a little fun at Tom’s expense by claiming that he rubs bird crap on his face to maintain his youthful glow:

Some celebrities opt for a bit of Botox or even a chemical peel in an attempt to keep their youthful looks. But not Tom Cruise, who instead swears that a smearing of bird-droppings on his face is all he needs to stay young.

According to Now magazine, the Rock of Ages star, 49, has told friends that his skin has never looked better thanks to the expensive spa treatment. It involves mixing poo from a nightingale with rice bran and water which is then applied as a face mask.

And a source told the magazine: “Tom doesn’t go in for Botox or surgery but he does pay close attention to all the new natural treatments. He recently started experimenting with the nightingale poo facial after it was recommended by a Hollywood pal and the results have been fantastic.”

Other celebrities believed to be fans of the poo treatment include David and Victoria Beckham, who used to be good friends with Cruise and Holmes. New York beautician Shizuka Bernstein said: “The nightingale poo acts as an exfoliant that brings out the dirt and adds shine.”

[From Daily Mail]

The Mail further hints that Tom got the great idea for rubbing bird excrement on his face from Victoria Beckham, who is allegedly a huge fan of the beauty secret as well. This story, as amusing as it might be, probably isn’t true. The Mail has already written a similar tale about how Gwyneth Paltrow rubs synthetic snake venom on her visage, which Gwyneth has denied. Also, I think stories like this may serve to distract us from Tom’s obvious plastic surgery.

Here’s Katie arriving with a half-untucked shirt at the family home in NYC on 6/27. She obviously no longer gives a crap about how she looks.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

Duchess Kate “vows to sleep on streets” (if streets are lined with eyeliner)

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 08:19 AM PDT

Let's just call this what it is, without having to hedge and backtrack. Duchess Kate has gotten a lot of bad press over the past week, and her (many) staffers are trying to reclaim the news cycle, change the subject, and make Kate look like a real working princess with an oh-so-common touch. The week has been full of stories about the Queen making sure that Kate "knows her place" in the royal protocol curtsey-line, then there was the back and forth about Kate's spending habits and how she (Prince Charles) has dropped $163,000 in one year on clothes – and she's not even a full-time working royal. And then there's the weirdness with Prince William maybe giving her parents money for their home. Basically, Kate was going to come out of this week looking like a couture-obsessed snob from a family of grifters, and a "duchess" who isn't as important as the "blood princesses". So what better way to change things up by announcing that you are literally going to "slum it"? Kate didn't really announce it, though the timing of this story is ridiculously convenient.

THE Duchess of Cambridge is to sleep rough on the streets of London. She will join Centrepoint ambassador and Loose Women star Lisa Maxwell on the Sleep Out campaign to raise awareness of the growing homeless problem in the capital.

Prince William, who is a patron of the charity like his mother Diana was before him, has already taken part in one. Lisa, 48, told Kate she should follow her husband's example and join her the next time she was involved and the Duchess agreed. Lisa said William, 30, introduced his wife to her at a party and the pair immediately hit it off.

She said: "I work with Centrepoint and William's our patron. We had a little do and they both came down. She asked me about sleeping out, so I said: 'Next time I do it, you're doing it with me. No excuses, he's done it.' She said: 'You're on'."

Speaking at London's Brasserie Blanc at an afterparty for the opening of her new play, Chicken, Lisa described the Duchess as "very savvy and very smart". William slept rough with other homeless people in the run-up to Christmas 2009, settling down next to wheelie bins close to Blackfriars Bridge.

Next to him was Centrepoint chief executive, Seyi Obakin, and William's private secretary, Jamie Lowther-Pinkerton. During the night, they almost got run over by a roadsweeper.

Writing on the Centrepoint website, Seyi revealed: "He was determined to do it as [Centrepoint] patron to raise awareness of the problem and to be able to understand a little better what rough sleepers go through."

A St James' Palace spokesperson said at the time: "Prince William took away from the experience the importance of tackling all the issues that cause people to be homeless and stay homeless, from drug dependency to mental health problems."

Centrepoint which helps the homeless in London and the North East, was one of six organisations Diana remained patron of when she scaled back her charitable interests. Kate, 30, joined William on a visit to the charity last year, getting involved in a healthy eating cookery programme. Latest figures show there has been a 20% increase in those sleeping rough in a year.

[From The Daily Mirror]

Is it a great cause? Of course. Will Kate bring a great deal of attention, focus and money to Centrepoint if she goes through with it? Yes, she will. Should she be applauded for going through with it, if she does go through with it? Absolutely. Is the timing of this story beyond suspicious and moving into "completely obvious PR scheme"? Yep.

By the way, Prince Charles has released his annual accounting, but if I'm reading this the right way, Charles didn't issue a real breakdown or list of what he was spending on which of the royal family members. Basically, we still don't know exactly how much Charles has spent on Kate in particular, we only know how much Charles spent in general – you can read the story here.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Ann Curry “wouldn’t even look at Matt Lauer” on her last day on ‘Today’

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 07:30 AM PDT

A lot of us had sympathy for Ann Curry yesterday. Nay, we've had sympathy for her for weeks now. My take is still that Ann deserved to go, and that she was not a very good co-anchor. But I still think that everything that went down, with the very public leaks of internal NBC business and with Matt Lauer basically calling the shots, pulling rank and ordering Curry to go, it was all a really nasty way to do business. And I don't think Lauer has come out of this dirty business unscathed – while many think that Ann deserved to go, Curry is now awash in public sympathy after she couldn't contain her tears during her sendoff, and I think she was genuinely devastated by how poorly she was treated. Here's the video again – note the body language between Ann and Matt.

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That was one of the most awkward kisses ever. Ann really looked like she was fighting it, right? Well, insiders claim that Curry and Lauer were extremely cold to each other when the cameras were off too:

Not-so-fond farewell. Ann Curry couldn’t fight back the tears when she announced her immediate departure from the TODAY show Thursday after 15 years at the show and just one year as co-host — with Matt Lauer and other colleagues offering comforting words of support on-air.

Behind the scenes, it was a different story. “It was so icy on the set,” an insider tells Us Weekly of the days leading up to Curry’s much-speculated farewell. “You could cut the tension with a knife.”

In particular, the dynamic between Curry, 55, and Lauer, 54, was particularly awkward. “When the cameras stopped rolling, Ann wouldn’t even look at Matt,” says the set source. (Indeed, on Thursday’s show, Curry pointedly hugged each of her colleagues except for Lauer.)

Adds another show source: “They were really icy with each other . . . The body language between them has been extremely tense.”

A third set source observed of Curry’s goodbye: “It was like a funeral in a way.”

Meanwhile, all eyes are now on Savannah Guthrie — rumored to be Curry’s replacement. At the beginning of Friday morning’s broadcast, the 40-year-old sat in Curry’s seat alongside Lauer, but no formal announcement had yet been made.

[From Us Weekly]

Savannah was on hand as co-anchor this morning, and it's believed that she has already signed a contract for the co-anchor position, although NBC has yet to make an official announcement. TMZ reports that NBC first went to Meredith Vieira, but she turned them down. So Savannah is the second choice, I guess. There will be a lot of armchair-quarterbacking on how this whole situation was handled, but I do think that Lauer's reputation has been dinged (if not fractured completely), and NBC and NBC News in particular looks like a contingent of anti-woman bullies. One critical piece even refers to them as "A Confederacy of Dunces".

Meanwhile, Lauer is already looking ahead to the Olympics, where it seems a time-honored tradition every two years for Lauer to pick up some strange (ALLEGEDLY). Lauer's wife knows what's up. So it's really funny that Radar now says Annette is coming with Lauer to the London Olympics so she can make him wear a dude-chastity-belt:

Matt Lauer’s wife, Annette Roque will be traveling across the pond for the London Olympics with their three children, to keep tabs on her husband and his roving eye as he spends time in the city reporting on the upcoming games, RadarOnline.com is exclusively reporting.

“Annette and the kids will all be going to the Olympics so she can keep very close tabs on Matt,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com. “Matt and his family will be staying at a different hotel than the rest of the cast and crew. Annette generally doesn’t like to accompany Matt when he travels for work, but it’s the Olympics and the kids are very excited. It’s hard to travel with three kids and Annette enjoys spending the summer at their Hamptons mansion where they live full-time now but Annette has made it very clear the whole family will be heading to London. Annette has made no bones about the fact she will be keeping close tabs on Matt.”

Annette filed for divorce from Lauer when she was pregnant with their third child in 2006, but soon thereafter the couple reconciled, and the divorce petition was withdrawn.

[Via Radar]

Dear Annette: DIVORCE HIM. And leak all of the dirty details.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Donatella Versace: “Feminism is dead in the world, it comes from another time”

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 06:48 AM PDT

"GOLLUM!!!!" *throws salt, wields crucifix*

Donatella Versace has a wonderful new interview with The Telegraph (UK) to promote the autumn/winter Versace line which debuted in Milan this week. You should read the full interview – go here. I'm going to do some highlights because, well, I kind of love Donatella. It's the same kind of love I have for Karl Lagerfeld – when you get to a certain point in the fashion industry, you are always going to be flat-out INSANE. Donatella is incredibly quotable, interesting, kind, blasé, funny and yes, cray-cray. I love her. The highlights:

Being 57 years old and "keeping young": “How do I keep young?” she growls in a dust-bowl of an accent so thick it sometimes requires subtitles. “Haven’t you heard? I sleep every night in the deep freezer!”

Her "armor": The flaxen, waist-length extensions, the fake lashes, the Botox (“only on my face, not on my body, that’s the result of hard work”) and stormy expressions – is a front she has been cultivating ever since, aged 11, her big brother Gianni goaded her to peroxide her hair.

She's BFFs with Miuccia Prada: “It surprises me,” she retorts. They first met in Milan, “at some event, somewhere… I made a joke and she started to laugh and she said let’s go and get some paninis because we’re starving… and off we went. We just talk, talk, talk. She’s so inspiring. We make fun of each other and teach each other. She says, ‘I could never make sexy clothes, but I love them.’ And I say, ‘Well, I love what you do’.”

On feminism: Miuccia Prada recently told me, dejectedly, that feminism was dead in Italy. Does Donatella agree? “Feminism is dead in the world. It comes from another time. I’m a feminist. I want to fight, but I don’t see many people with this desire to fight for something. Women don’t help each other, especially in fashion. I know Miuccia… but that’s it. Nobody else.”

Living up to her brother Gianni: “You’re right,” she says. “I’ve always been hard on myself. I still am. In order to be responsible you need some discipline in your life. For a while I lost mine. But I’ve got it back now. Maybe a bit too much… I’m so disciplined. I’m so on time. What happened to me?”

How discipline works for Donatella: It means working out four times a week (“not in fresh air, I’m not going to pretend I’m a country girl”), rather than giving up smoking. She has cut down – just one packet a day, for which she has created a special cover so that she doesn’t have to keep looking at the Smoking Kills message. Less predictably, she says she loves reading historical biographies – her current book is on Queen Victoria. She tried reading Fifty Shades of Grey , the erotic mega bestseller, but found it too badly written to finish. Actually, she is surprisingly old-fashioned – especially where her children are concerned: “I think there was a time when I was too strict and controlling,” she admits. “I think I asphyxiated my children.”

Her daughter, Allegra: Allegra, her 24-year-old daughter who inherited 50 per cent of the company and who, Donatella says, plays Saffy (the sensible daughter in Ab Fab) to her Eddie, now works in the family business, researching textiles, having previously turned her back on it to act. “I’ve been surprised by her concentration and determination,” says her mother.

Her son: Daniel, her 20-year-old son, is a rock musician living in London. “He’s recording right now. He’s always in the studio but he never lets me listen. He’s very private. He doesn’t want to be recognised as my son. Not that Allegra listens to me, either. Neither of my children listens to me,” she sighs contentedly.

On working with Lady Gaga: Oddly, the two events that proved most restorative were her recent collaborations with Lady Gaga, who is something of a DV doppelgänger in looks as well as spirit, and the high street chain H&M. The former had personally requested that Donatella dress her. “We opened the archives and she was, like, wow, and then I designed some pieces for her and she went crazy.”

Following her instincts: “After Gianni died all these experts kept telling me what would sell and what wouldn’t. After a while I realised nobody knows. He always said, you have to follow your instincts. There was no ‘safe’ with Gianni. He wasn’t a safe person. He kept telling me not to be afraid of anything.”

On family: “Family…” she breaks off. This is the real key to her revival. “You do what you can for them. They don’t listen,” she shrugs. “But if they did they’d be telling me that the most important things in life are strength, determination, loyalty and never giving up. You have to fight for everything.”

[Via The Telegraph]

So much to love! She get Botox “only on my face, not on my body, that’s the result of hard work.” AMAZING. She'll work out four times a week (but not in fresh air!) but she won't give up smoking. She's a feminist who thinks feminism is dead. I kind of want to marry her. She's wonderful.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Rielle Hunter on CNN: “it surprises me how mean people are… it’s unfair”

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 06:18 AM PDT

You’ll excuse me while we revisit captain batsh*t here and cackle over some of her latest ironic comments about how she’s a victim. As you know, Rielle Hunter got dumped by hapless onetime Presidential hopeful, John Edwards, after she came out with a book detailing their affair and trashing Edwards’ late wife, Elizabeth Edwards. Rumor has it that Edwards’ oldest daughter, Cate, told him to break up with Rielle or lose any kind of contact with her. It was a long time coming, and it reveals what a spineless twit John Edwards is that he couldn’t drop Rielle without an ultimatum from his daughter. Well Rielle was on The Piers Morgan show promoting her book, and she whined about how her breakup was painful, and how “mean” people were to her. I don’t need to point out how ripe this is.

On public perception of her
HUNTER: Destroyer, villain, evil, basher. All of that… I think all of it is unfair.

On if Cate made John break up with her
HUNTER: The truth is we’ve had problems for a very long time that we haven’t addressed because we put the children first. So it just came to a head. Everything came to a head with the — and the media scrutiny and bashing is very hot right now, obviously.

If she’s surprised at the media scrutiny
what surprises me most is how mean people are and how much they judge based on things that they don’t know anything about. That always surprises me.

[From Transcripts.CNN.com]

Then Rielle and Piers got into this long back and forth where she refused to discuss details of her breakup with Edwards. She also claimed that she offered Edwards advance copies of the book multiple times, but that he didn’t want to read it ahead of time. She wouldn’t say whether he’s read it now after publication. Piers also pressed her about why she trashed Edwards’ late wife Elizabeth in the book, and she laughingly tried to claim that she wasn’t trashing Elizabeth, she was discussing relationships in general. (Disclosure: I haven’t read the book and I’m not going to.)

On why she won’t discuss the breakup or say if John has read the book
The media is not entitled to everything in your life.

On trashing Elizabeth, she didn’t mean it that way and she’s the victim
MORGAN: And the main criticism has come from the way you describe Elizabeth. And you know, you use phrases about her, venomous, crazy, witch on wheels.

HUNTER: I did not say — a witch on wheels is not about Elizabeth. These things are taken out of context. When you read the story — just you take the little tidbit about the extraordinary night and you take it out of context —

MORGAN: Who was the witch on wheels?

HUNTER: I was talking about passive aggressive relationships, when a man doesn’t stand up — in general, relationships in general, when the man doesn’t stand up, the woman is often seen as a witch on wheels, often vilified, which incidentally is exactly what has happened to me.

On how she felt when John Edwards publicly denied that baby Quinn was his
I was devastated. It was devastating. I knew he was going to do it as well, but it didn’t — even knowing he was going to do it did not prepare me for how it felt.

On how she takes the criticism
It’s hard. It’s very hard to have the wrath of America directed at you, especially — and I really do want to say that I — I am responsible for my part in this. And I do take responsibility for my part and I am not a home wrecker.

Claims she wrote the book for her daughter
Because there’s so much distortion about this story. And I feel that it’s unfair for my daughter and really for all the kids to have to grow up under the umbrella of negativity and distortion. Because what happens, though, is like there’s all this — this judgment based upon things that are not true. And that judgment actually affects the kids.

[From Transcripts.CNN.com]

In that interview, Rielle also talked about the sex tape she made with John in Uganda. (The one that former Edwards aid Andrew Young was holding as collateral.) Or rather, Piers asked her about it and she hedged and refused to answer any questions about it. She wouldn’t say whether making the tape was her idea or John’s. She was a “filmmaker” hired to document the Edwards campaign, and she’s already dished plenty of dirt about him, so draw your own conclusions.

It’s all about her. Rielle is the victim, and she turns everything around so we’re focused on poor Rielle and how she’s misunderstood and vilified. She’s just trying to set the record straight for her daughter, by creating a record of the very shady and underhanded way she was conceived.

Here are some clips from the show. Rielle asks rhetorically, “Do you really think men cheat for bad sex?”

Here’s where she claims she was devastated at Edwards’ claims that Quinn wasn’t his daughter.

Jennifer Aniston tells friends that “sex saved her relationship with Justin”

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 06:05 AM PDT

In case you missed it on this week's Us Weekly cover, Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston were "pap'd" while vacationing in Capri last week. Us Weekly and a few other publications bought the photos – you can see one of them here at Us Weekly online, and the print edition has even more photos of Justin shirtless and Jennifer in a bikini. I'll admit, both of them have great bodies. But the whole Us Weekly piece definitely has the feel of a PR plant, which OF COURSE Aniston would never do, of course. That's why the piece is full of descriptions like "his sexy six-pack abs" and "Theroux’s stealthily chiseled body." They were photographed on a yacht where Justin sunbathed but didn't swim… is that weird? Because if I'm getting into a swimsuit, I'm going swimming. I don't understand any other way. In addition to the photos, Star Magazine (who has previously claimed that JustJen are close to O-V-E-R) says that JustJen's European vacation brought the spark back to their relationship. Because they boned in the middle of an Italian grotto. Or something.

After their sexy rendezvous in Paris and then a romp through Rome, Jennifer and Justin peeled off to the steamy Italian island of Capri. A bikini-clad Jen, 43, and her hunky beau, 40, were spotted cavorting aboard a yacht there, sunbathing intimately close to one another and snapping pictures in their skimpy swimwear.

The couple's European escape – which was prompted by a need to reignite the passion in their relationship following fights over where to live, whether to start a family and Justin's friendliness with his ex – turned into a nonstop lovefest.

In Paris, "Jen and Justin stayed holed up in their suite for two days, doing nothering but making love," an insider reveals. And in Capri "they took a private tour to the famed Blue Grotto and asked their guide to give them some private time… After Jen and Justin disappeared, the guides heard suspicious sounds and yelled, 'Everything OK in there?'"

Seems like the duo are hot and heavy again! Says a friend: "Jen is gushing that sex saved her relationship with Justin."

[From Star Magazine, print edition]

I had to look up The Blue Grotto. It's totally beautiful. I'm not sure if I want to have sex there, but whatever. I'm glad that JustJen are still making it work.

There's also some weird news about Aniston maintaining a friendship with one of Brad Pitt's buddies – TMZ has photos of George Clooney and Stacy Keibler sharing a private plane with Jennifer and Justin last week. You can see the pics here. The day after that plane ride, Clooney met Pitt for a boozy boy's night in London. I don't know what it all means, I'm just passing on the information. I would imagine that Stacy and Jennifer would get along really well. I imagine they spent the whole flight talking about dogs and workouts while Justin and George tried to out-pretentious each other. Tell me I'm wrong.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

Miranda Kerr covers Bazaar UK, talks about giving birth without an epidural

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 06:03 AM PDT

Miranda Kerr covers the new (August) issue of Harper's Bazaar UK. The photo shoot is definitely horse-and-whip themed, with some bonus lingerie shots. I think Miranda has a beautiful face, and I like her on the runway and everything, but I don't really need to see her in lingerie or anything. I just don't find her that "sexy". Beautiful, yes. Cute, of course. But sexy? Not really. So while I'm not crazy about the theme in these shots, I do think she looks gorgeous. In the Bazaar interview, Kerr talks about baby Flynn and getting back into shape and all of that. Some highlights:

Kerr on whether she'll have more kids: "’I think probably, yes. Having a child is the most incredible experience. What's surprised me most is just how incredible the bond is between you and your child. To watch him grow and evolve every day is really inspiring."

Losing the baby weight: "’I didn't feel pressure to snap back into shape. My priority was just having my son and breastfeeding, which was something I really wanted to do, and it came easily. I'm actually still making milk now but, you know, he's got teeth."

She loves to sing: "I love to sing, and I’ve recorded a few covers and originals with friends, but I haven’t written any songs” she reveals.

She doesn't want Orly to watch her on the catwalk: “I never really want Orlando to be there [in the audience of a show] because it makes me nervous. But last year, he was like, ‘You have no choice, I’m coming’. And the one time he was attending the show, my shoe decided to fall off.”

Giving birth to Flynn: “I had made a decision that I wanted to do it [naturally]. I had been watching all these baby-bonding videos, and [without epidural] when the baby comes out it goes straight onto the breast” she explains. “Then they showed ones right after the epidural, and that didn’t happen. The baby was a little bit drugged up, and I was like ‘Well, I don’t want that.’ I wanted to give him the best possible start in life I could.”

The perfect morning: “To wake up to the sound of my son saying ‘Mama, mama!’ It’s the best sound ever. Then I just love to get him out of bed and he can jump into bed with us, and we have cuddle time.”

[Via The Mail and The Telegraph]

I always hear the natural-childbirth-mothers say things like "I didn't want my baby to be drugged up" and "I wanted to give him the best possible start in life I could." Here's an honest question: is there any science to back up the idea that natural childbirth is the absolute best? Or, put another way, is there any scientific evidence to suggest that a baby being born with some drugs in his or her system – from the mother's epidural – is somehow harmful in the long run? I'm not judging either way, I just know that if it ever happens for me, I want lots and lots of drugs and from what I've heard and seen, it really doesn't make that big of a difference in the long run.

I'm also including some photos of Miranda and Orly Bloom yesterday in NYC, where Orly was literally DRAGGING her to see the Broadway show Peter And The Starcatcher.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and The Fashion Spot.

Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen offer $17K fur handbag, PETA throws a hissy

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 04:59 AM PDT

Last year, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen were widely criticized for offering a $39,000 alligator handbag/backpack through their high-fashion line, The Row. Allegedly, the 39K bag was "selling out" at Barney's, and all of the divas had to have one. PETA complained, and everyone was like, "Ugh, conspicuous consumption sucks" but… I don't know. I didn't see what the huge fuss was about. No one was being forced to buy the bag. Of course it was ridiculously overpriced and of course no one needs a $39K bag. The Olsens took the criticism in stride, if "stride" means "completely ignoring their critics and going on to win 'Womenswear Designers of the Year' at the CFDAs." And now the Olsens have one-upped their 2011 offering with a new $17,000 bag. Here it is:

OMFG. How hideous is that? I'm a purse person (as opposed to a shoe person), and you couldn't pay me to carry that roadkill-looking thing. That was another reason I was meh on the $39K bag – I actually thought the bag was cute. Not "$39,000 cute" but cute. This one is just awful, though. Anyway, the Olsens are facing even more criticism. Because it worked so well the last time:

What Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (and Kim Kardashian, Kanye West and Reese Witherspoon to name a few) call fashion, PETA calls blasphemous.

The twin fashion designers received some flack from the People for Ethical Treatment of Animals after creating an almost $17,000—yeah, you read that right—backpack for their luxury fashion line The Row made of patches of animal fur.

And the animal-rights organization didn’t exactly sugarcoat their feelings on the situation.

“If it looks like a troll and acts like a troll, it’s probably a Trollsen Twin—or someone wearing one of their new $16,000 totes, which are made from the fur and skins of innocent animals,” PETA said in a statement to E! News.

“What the Olsens lack in creativity, they try to make up for in shock value. Sadly, it’s the foxes, calves, and alligators—who often have the fur ripped off them while they are still conscious and able to feel pain—who pay the dearest price.”

Meanwhile, the creation by 2012′s Womenswear Designers of the Year caught the eye of well-known stylist and reality star Rachel Zoe, who called the accessory next season’s staple item on her Zoe Report.

[From E! News]

Maybe the Olsens answer to last year's criticism was to make a bag that was less expensive? No, they knew what they were doing by making a fur bag. They wanted the criticism. They wanted the scandal and controversy. All for an indefensibly ugly bag.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Blake Lively’s dog had an “accident” at a photo shoot: bad dog or bad owner?

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 04:32 AM PDT

I feel like I've heard a version of this story before, only it involved a different celebrity and a different dog. Where did I hear this? Maybe it was that story last year about Ryan Gosling bringing his puppy George to yoga class where George peed inside. Probably. Anyway, in this week's animal-defecation news, Blake Lively's little dog Penny is a BAD DOG!! Blake brought Penny (and Ryan Reynolds' puppy Baxter) to a magazine photo shoot and Penny had an "accident". The bad news? Penny came close to mistaking a thousand-dollar Versace dress for a pee pad. The good news? Penny has bad aim.

Blake Lively nearly triggered a big stink by showing up to model for a splashy-glam magazine cover shoot toting cuddle-stud Ryan Reynolds' dog, Baxter, and her own pet pooch Penny, but Momma's adorable dog suddenly moved its bowels thisclose to a rack of floor-length, multi-thousand-dollar Versace gowns – dumping a poop pile barely an inch from the high-end duds.

"Blake was sooo embarrassed," said a source. "She kept apologizing profusely about the mishap and thanking staffers who were cleaning up the mess."

[From The Enquirer, print edition]

I'm including photos of Penny just to emphasize how small this little dog is. I mean, isn't "a pile of poop" a little bit dramatic? I bet Penny's poop resembles rabbit pellets. Anyway, yeah – this was embarrassing. For Blake and for Penny. Baxter must have been like, "Haha, now Penny has to stay home during mom's photo shoots and I still get to come with her because I'm a good dog!" And lest you think I'm being overly dramatic with my anthropomorphism, dogs totally think like this. I remember my old dog, Ollie, would get super-happy when one of the cats did something bad. You'd be yelling at the cat and Ollie would get so much pleasure out of it. Baxter totally thinks this way. Penny is going to have to stay home from now on, and Baxter gets to be top dog with his main bitch Blake.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.

In Touch: Johnny Depp & Amber Heard “are not exclusive, are not serious”

Posted: 29 Jun 2012 04:27 AM PDT

I hope you don't mind, but I'm kind of fazing out of the Johnny Depp drama. I always liked him as an actor, but I was never really "OMG, he's the hottest thing ever" about him. My panties were never in the game, thus, I don't feel personally offended that Depp has turned into a massive douche in the midst of an epic mid-life crisis. That's the way it goes with some dudes. Meh. I am interested in knowing what's going on with Johnny and Amber Heard, just because it's emerging every day that Johnny and Amber are in the middle of a full-blown love affair… or so it would seem. Us Weekly claims that Amber and Johnny have been boning for months, ever since they were promoting The Rum Diary last year, and sources claim JD and Amber are "100% dating" and that Amber is a frequent visitor to the set of The Lone Ranger.

In Touch Weekly's sources have a similar take, but there are some interesting quotes in there too. One source says Amber and Johnny "have a lot in common… they are both very sexual and very artistic. Amber idolizes Johnny." In Touch says that Amber and Tasya van Ree called it quits several months ago, around the same time that Johnny and Amber were "heating up." But! An insider says that Johnny "isn't jumping from one serious relationship to another… he and Amber are not exclusive." Also, the insider notes that Amber "is very smart, and she knows how to get attention. She doesn't mind being linked to a man like Johnny." So is it a little bit from Column A, a little from Column B? Johnny and Amber are boning/dating, but the relationship is being played up because Amber wants attention? I don't know. It's a theory. Adding to that theory: Amber and her maybe-girlfriend Tasya van Ree were spotted together yesterday. And by “spotted together” I mean “posed for a candid photo shoot”. You can see the photos here. I’m not sure what’s up.

Meanwhile, The Enquirer claims Vanessa Paradis is seriously pissed AND they haven't worked out all of the money drama yet. Some highlights:

JOHNNY DEPP is facing the world's biggest-ever palimony case over his $350 million "Pirates of the Caribbean" treasure chest from spurned lover VANESSA PARADIS. Furious over bombshell reports that the heartthrob actor has been wildly partying and secretly romancing a string of beautiful women, Johnny's longtime French lover Vanessa Paradis is demanding an equal share of his movie millions, say friends.

At 49, the superstar has become Hollywood's highest-paid actor – raking in more than $20 million a film. In 2010 alone, he reportedly made a whopping $100 million.

"Vanessa is gunning for Johnny," revealed an insider. "She played a big part in his success and for years they shared everything. It's only in recent months that they've lived separate lives. Vanessa hears about all these other women, and Johnny's drinking and partying, and she can't help wondering how long it's been going on. And career-wise, while he was becoming a major movie star, she took a seven-year break from recording albums. Just because they never got married doesn't mean she shouldn't have the same rights as a wife. She feels she deserves a hefty portion of that $350 million fortune."

Vanessa, 39, might snare a big chunk because they were together when Depp made most of his money, say sources. His career didn't soar until he was cast as Capt. Jack Sparrow in Disney's "Pirates" franchise, and that was five years after he started romancing her in 1998.

In addition to their millions, the couple owns homes in the South of France and in Venice, Italy, as well as one in Britain and two in Los Angeles. They also own an island in the Bahamas as well as a yacht.

Famed divorce attorney Raoul Felder believes Vanessa is in for a huge payday.

"Even though Johnny and Vanessa never married, factoring in the length of their relationship – 14 years – as well as having two kids together, she could walk away with millions in palimony and maintenance," he told The ENQUIRER.

As recently as last summer, Vanessa sported a diamond "the size of the Ritz" on her ring finger, according to a published report. And that ring will carry a lot of weight in any palimony battle, noted the New York-based attorney.

"What is key to this case, compared to other unmarried couples, is that she has a ring from him," Felder said. "That is likely to make a big difference."

[Via The Enquirer]

The Enquirer finishes it off by saying that Vanessa is "heartbroken" when she realized the extent of Johnny's philandering, and "Now she wants her just due – in millions." The Enquirer also name-checks Angelina Jolie – I wondered when that was coming, and I can't believe it took more than a week for someone to say, "Huh, I wonder if Johnny also boned Angelina?" To be fair to the Enquirer, they just say that Vanessa was jealous of Johnny and Angelina's "steamy on-set chemistry." My guess? Amber Heard is filling in for Angelina in this particular scandal. Bisexual, a little bit crazy, nice boobs, an exhibitionist… it's like Angelina circa 1999.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Friday, June 29, 2012

Cele|bitchy

Cele|bitchy

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