Best Week Ever

Wait, Did 2010 Movies Actually Kick Ass?
Nicolas Cage Channels Nicolas Cage In Romanian Nightclub Freak Out
Bison Rides In Cars, Goes To Bars
Jets Coach Trips Dolphins Player In Monty Python Copycat Crime
Old Computer + Miley Cyrus Bong Video = New Computer
The Brutal Yogi Bear Alternate Ending Where Boo Boo Kills Yogi
New Blockbuster Ads Confuse Vampires Suck With Saving Your Life
Nine Minute Emerson College Lady Gaga Lip Dub
Go Ahead And Try To Deal With This Cat On This Dog’s Head
Daft Punk Walks The Red Carpet At The Tron: Legacy Premiere

Wait, Did 2010 Movies Actually Kick Ass?

Posted: 14 Dec 2010 08:32 AM PST

Confession: This has been a bad year between me and movies. For whatever reason, I’ve barely made it out to the theater, and have only seen a handful of new releases on airplanes and the like. Sure, I could take part of the blame, but let’s face it, a lot of movies looked super megawatt sh*tty. Not all, but most. Or so I thought.

This video, Filmography 2010, has strung together all of this year’s biggest hits and misses in 6 minutes of action packed goodness. I can’t decide if some of these movies were really amazing or if when 300 movies are edited into one bite-sized, geniously edited short they all look great.

Oh, remember when I forgot how to have fun?? It happened in paragraph 1 starting with “Confession.” Forgot all of this conjecture about the year in film and just ENJOY. It’s brilliant.

No, but really, which of these movies should I see? (Other than Inception, duh.) If I said that I watched The Other Guys on an airplane last night and thoroughly enjoyed it, how will you judge me?

(via ONTD)

Nicolas Cage Channels Nicolas Cage In Romanian Nightclub Freak Out

Posted: 14 Dec 2010 08:39 AM PST

Well, we all hate it when somebody screams unintelligibly in English while in Romania, and then the Romanians subtitle a video of it in Romanian. Hello?! This is America where we’re watching this YouTube. Subtitle in English, please.

But even though you can’t tell exactly what Nicolas Cage is screaming, you can still hear the undeniable Nicolas Cage intonations.

“I want to take his Romanian Subtitles… off.” – Line from Nicolas Cages upcoming movie Roman Subtitles Off.

From Huffpo.

Bison Rides In Cars, Goes To Bars

Posted: 14 Dec 2010 08:08 AM PST

No, that’s not a lyric from some other-dimensional Buffalo George Thorogood, it’s the actual lower-third from this local news report about a Canadian man who takes his 1,600 pound pet bison out to bars. The only problem, he says, is when the bison’s “hooves slip on the dance floor.” Apparently, he’s not counting the part where the bartender says “Why is any of this happening? Please make it not.” as a problem.

Also, the buffalo’s name is Bailey D. Buffalo Jr., which makes the little kid inside me still want to complain “why’s his last name Buffalo? My name isn’t Dan HUMAN.’” Let’s take this outside, guy who feeds beer to his pet buffalo:

(via Dlisted)

Jets Coach Trips Dolphins Player In Monty Python Copycat Crime

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 02:19 PM PST

The internet is abuzz today with accusations that New York Jets strength & conditioning coach Sal Alosi intentionally stuck out his knee and tripped Dolphins special teamer Nolan Carroll on the sidelines Sunday during a punt return.

In Alosi’s defense, I personally believe that his obvious trip was nothing more than a loving homage to John Cleese’s trip from the rugby match in Monty Python’s The Meaning Of Life. Watch the two clips below and compare:

Jets Coach Trip:

John Cleese Trip:

If Alosi gets off without a fine, it’ll merely confirm what I’ve always suspected: Roger Goodell can secretly quote every Python movie in his sleep.

Old Computer + Miley Cyrus Bong Video = New Computer

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 01:45 PM PST

According to TMZ, Miley Cyrus‘s “people” knew about the bong video weeks before it surfaced, and they employed a very sophisticated strategy to try to keep the video from being released.

Sources tell TMZ a college student who came into possession of the video contacted one of Miley’s reps shortly after Thanksgiving, asking if the rep wanted his copy [...]

Sources say Miley’s camp sent a man in his 40s to the student’s college campus in the San Luis Obispo area. The student gave the man his MacBook Pro which contained the “bong” video … in return the man gave the student a new MacBook Pro. We’re told nomoney changed hands, though we don’t know why.

And we’ve learned … Miley’s camp did the same computer swap with another student who also had a copy of the video.

Sophistication! That’s not even close to a thing that could work. Miley needs better people.

“We’re going to trade TV screen fax machines that don’t have the bong video inside them for all the TV screen fax machines that do have the bong video inside them. PROBLEM SOLVED!” – Miley Cyrus’s People

This is what Plan B probably was: Let’s just tell the kids not to tell anyone about the video. But, get this… before we tell them that… we say “Seriously.”

File under “Bad Plans.”

The Brutal Yogi Bear Alternate Ending Where Boo Boo Kills Yogi

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 12:08 PM PST

All this time we’ve been rushing to judge Yogi Bear based on the stupid previews, not knowing that the alternate ending for the film was actually a brutal, heart-wrenching homage to The Assassination of Jesse James (the parody was apparently made by the film’s actual animators.)

Why would an audience of four-year-olds not want to see this ending? Boo Boo’s only doing what he has to, plus he’ll be set up for life when he collects the reward. Are children really that sickened by the old-west notion of cowardice? Cause that’s literally the only reason I can think of for not showing this to kids:

(via Paul Scheer)

New Blockbuster Ads Confuse Vampires Suck With Saving Your Life

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 11:34 AM PST

Blockbuster is currently running a series of commercials bashing Netflix by declaring that Blockbuster movies are available up to 28 days sooner. The following ad makes this point by saying “You wouldn’t wait 28 days to see a doctor if you were impaled through the heart with a fencepost, so why would you wait 28 days to watch the action-comedy romp Knight And Day?”

GREAT POINT, Blockbuster:

Call me a bleedingheart, liberal, commie, “live-monger” if you will, but personally, I believe that HAVING YOUR LIFE SAVED IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN WATCHING THE MOVIE VAMPIRES SUCK SLIGHTLY SOONER.

I realize the ad isn’t literal, but could they possibly ruin their argument more instantly than by saying “This person is gonna DIE because they have to wait in the hospital” then picking Knight And Day, Vampires Suck, and Going The Distance as examples of DVDs that absolutely threaten your life if you don’t watch them at home a little earlier?

Blockbuster, are you making me choose between bleeding to death from a fencepost sticking through my torso and paying to stream Vampires Suck on my phone? Even Saw’s like, “That’s rough.”

Nine Minute Emerson College Lady Gaga Lip Dub

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 02:29 PM PST

Full Disclosure: I went to Emerson College and I had a really great time there.

Fuller Disclosure: Emerson College is enormously gay and theater-y. Good Christ, is it ever gay and theater-y. There was a guy who wore a feather boa and face glitter most days while demanding to be called Ginger. And then every year they had a drag contest DURING PARENTS’ WEEKEND. “Hi, Midwestern moms! Wanna see your son in fishnets?” – Emerson College.

So, now lip dub videos are all over the internet and Lady Gaga is famous. What is Emerson College going to do… not make a nine minute Lady Gaga lip dub video? UNLIKELY.

Oh, wow. That was a whole lot of that to a very extreme degree. Way to stay ahead of the whole lip dub trend, Emerson.

Now, take all of the feelings you have about this video and then imagine adding nostalgia to it. That is how I feel. It is uncomfortable. There should be a minus sign after my degree.

Thanks, Urlesque.

Go Ahead And Try To Deal With This Cat On This Dog’s Head

Posted: 13 Dec 2010 10:38 AM PST

Try to deal with this. Bet you can’t. “I want the dog with a cat on top of its head!” YOU CAN’T HANDLE THE DOG WITH A CAT ON TOP OF ITS HEAD! You are not going to be able to manage with your brain the consequences of a cat looking like one of those hats with the ear flaps, and, furthermore, you will have enormous difficulty with grappling with that cat being on top of a dog’s head. Error 3194: cathatondog cannot execute.