Cele|bitchy

“Who does Gwyneth have to bang to get a Coldplay CD?” links
Ashley Greene’s child-sized romper: too short, or perfect for a summer day?
The other royal wedding: Zara Phillips & Mike Tindall are getting married tomorrow

“Who does Gwyneth have to bang to get a Coldplay CD?” links

Posted: 29 Jul 2011 11:23 AM PDT

Oh, Gwyneth. Try banging your husband, maybe that will work? [LaineyGossip]
Meatloaf is a mess. Remember how Angelina Jolie was in one of his videos? [Dlisted]
CATS! Kittehs. What to do with all of these kittehs. [Gawker]
Review of Crazy, Stupid, Love. I'm seeing it this weekend. [Pajiba]
Rachel Zoe's son has a better wardrobe than all of us combined. [Pop Sugar]
Terry Richardson released some of his old, crackie Amy Winehouse pics. [Yeeeah]
Jennifer Lopez doesn't look thrilled with her costume. At all. [Go Fug Yourself]
Kirstie Alley calls out David Letterman to his face. [Jezebel]
Shiloh's Montenegro-style vest was Stella McCartney! [Celebrity Baby Scoop]
Linnocent: born druggie, or MADE druggie? [PopBytes]
I don't like Mila Kunis's dress here either. [I'm Not Obsessed]
Olivia Wilde has CGI nipples. [The Blemish]
Rob Kardashian is going to be on DWTS? [LimeLife]
Michael Douglas is still smoking. [ICYDK]
Hello, Isaiah Mustafa. You look nice. [A Socialite Life]
I LOVE the implosion of Glee. Cast and creator are all d-bags. [Amy Grindhouse]
The Beckhams want one more baby! [The Celebrity Café]
The summer of breakups! Who's next? Garner & Affleck? Goop & Chris? [Celebuzz]

Ashley Greene’s child-sized romper: too short, or perfect for a summer day?

Posted: 29 Jul 2011 10:47 AM PDT

…a perfect summer day of famewhoring, that is. To give Ashley Greene credit, it's the middle of summer and she's wearing a tiny little summer romper. You'd be surprised how many women don't dress for the season - and chill out, Californians, I know you guys almost always have good weather and the "seasonal" fashion rules don't apply to you. I'm just saying, I would point and laugh if I saw this romper on a woman in November, I don't care what state you're in.

So, given that it's summer, should I just say "meh" on her? The thing is, these are photos of her out shopping in Beverly Hills. She's, like, out on Rodeo Drive*, and she probably arranged this "candid" photo shoot (a lot of agencies managed to get these photos). So, this is how she shops. It just feels like it's too short. It feels like a child-sized romper is a bad shopping outfit, especially when you're shopping in Beverly Hills. But seriously, what do I know? When I first saw these pics, I thought she was completely nude from the waist down.

*I just saw that one of the bags she's carrying is from Express. For real? That's like calling the paparazzi on yourself as you shop at Old Navy.

Ashley's not the only one doing this child-sized romper thing. These pics of Kourtney and Khloe Kardashian are from yesterday too - Kourtney's romper is so tiny and ill-fitting, Khloe had to go behind her and fix the back of it, where I'm sure Kourtney's ass was hanging out.

Photos courtesy of Fame.

The other royal wedding: Zara Phillips & Mike Tindall are getting married tomorrow

Posted: 29 Jul 2011 10:14 AM PDT

There's another royal wedding going down this weekend, but don't expect some big, exciting, over-the-top affair. *Sniff* Zara Phillips, the daughter of Princess Anne, is marrying her love Mike Tindall, a professional rugby player. Zara isn't really royal - her mother may be a princess, but Anne married a commoner who didn't want to take a title, and Anne raised her children as "commoners". However, it's said that Zara has always been one of the Queen's favorites amongst her grandchildren. Zara is horsey and athletic and tough, just like her mom. As for Mike… well, he's got the bent nose, and he comes from a "working class" background, but he seems to have just a pure love for Zara that really comes through in photos and interviews. They're kind of adorable together! CB loves them too, by the way. All of a sudden, Zara is one of our favorite people. Anyway, HuffPo summarizes some of the details about the wedding, which is going down tomorrow in Scotland:

Although she counts Princess Anne as her mother, Zara Phillips and her fiance Mike Tindall are famously as far from the royal mindset as they come. As Zara’s future mother-in-law Linda Tindall told the Daily Mail, “Many-a-time Mike has said if she worked at Tesco [supermarket] at the checkout it would not matter, it’s about her and the sort of person she is.”

But while Phillips has been accepted into the Tindall clan with ease, acclimating Tindall to his new royal relatives has been harder. The Telegraph reports that Princess Anne suggested he have corrective surgery on his nose, which is slightly misshapen from repeated sports injuries. “She’s a bit worried about how the wedding photos might turn out,” the Telegraph revealed.

She needn’t worry too much, as the photos will most likely not be seen by the general public: as previously noted, Buckingham Palace thwarted Phillips’ plans to sell wedding day photos to tabloid magazine Hello! for over $800,000.

Instead, Phillips and Tindall’s nuptials this Saturday will be private, more of “a family thing” than a royal event, says the BBC.

Owing to Zara’s non-royal status (while her mother has a royal title, she and her brother Peter do not), the wedding is being independently funded, with even the royal reception venue, Holyroodhouse in Scotland, being paid for out of pocket by Zara’s grandmother, Queen Elizabeth II.

Tindall’s guests will include many fellow rugby players, while Phillips has invited members of her equestrian community.

“She regards herself as a sportswoman not as a royal. She would even dispute the fact it’s a royal wedding,” said Joe Little, editor of Majesty magazine to the BBC.

Added royal historian Hugo Vickers, “I wouldn’t say he is marrying into the royal family, rather she is marrying out of the royal family.”

There is one indisputably royal element of the wedding: Friday night’s pre-party on the famous Royal Yacht Britannia. Once described by Queen Elizabeth II as “the one place I can truly relax,” the Royal Yacht Britannia is 83rd in a line of royal yachts and has seen Winston Churchill, Mahatma Ghandi, Mikhail Gorbachev, Ronald Reagan and Nelson Mandela (to name a few) come aboard its decks, writes the Telegraph.

More importantly, the Telegraph noted, four royal couples have bunked in the yacht’s honeymoon suite after their weddings…and all have been doomed to failure: Princess Margaret and the Earl of Snowdon sailed in 1960, Zara’s mum Princess Anne and father Captain Mark Phillips shared the room in 1973, Charles and Diana honeymooned in 1981, and Prince Andrew and Sarah Ferguson used the boat for their honeymoon in 1986.

Looks like Zara and Mike’s reported lack of honeymoon might actually be a blessing in disguise. Phillips and Tindall will forgo a honeymoon as the groom returns to rugby training camp on Sunday night, writes the Telegraph.

[From Huffington Post]

Mike also discussed Zara's fiery personality, saying that he's the unemotional one: "The fire and ice thing is true to a certain extent. Being angry doesn't come naturally to me. Zara isn't like that. She'll say how she feels and show her emotions. To start with, people wondered whether our backgrounds were too different – but it's not a problem… [The royal family are] good, fun people – all of them. They're just a normal family." He also said something that is making a little bit weepy - talking about how they aren't doing their honeymoon right away because they've got athletic events scheduled, Mike said: "But that's the way we like our lives. Low-key, with lots of sport and as much time together as possible. I'm looking forward to Zara being my wife. Is that soppy enough?" Aw…

Look how adorable they are with each other! Also: Zara has, like, a Kardashian ass. Oh, and I included one of Princess Anne, because THAT HAIR needs to go.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Saturday, July 30, 2011

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