Cele|bitchy

---

• Justin Theroux & Jennifer Aniston leave London, hand-in-hand
• Kim Kardashian sues Old Navy over Reggie Bush’s Kim-look-alike girlfriend
• Scarlett Johansson can never be alone, she’s trying to get with Justin Bartha now
• Jennifer Aniston brought Justin Theroux to London, just to party with her
• Jennifer Lopez wanted to dump Marc Anthony last Christmas
• Prince Albert throws a hissy fit to the press about the state of marriage
• Kate Winslet shills for St. John: “I’m not a model, I have a real shape”
• Sarah Palin about to become a grandmother for the second time
• Celine Dion gets “Ridiculous Pictures of Celine Dion” website shut down
• Chelsea Handler’s old drinking buddy: “Every time… drugs were involved.”

Justin Theroux & Jennifer Aniston leave London, hand-in-hand Posted: 21 Jul 2011 09:02 AM PDT New photos! Fresh! Jennifer Aniston and her lover Justin Theroux leaving London just a short while ago, walking through Heathrow with stony expressions, hand-in-hand. Body language? Eh. I think they were probably both pissy that paparazzi were getting that close to them, but if you want to think that they were pissed off at each other, sure, I'll go along with that too. Two different occasions within 24 hours where Aniston is photographed holding hands with a boy?!? Shocking, truly shocking. Once again, I guess they're saving the red-carpet walk for…? Wanderlust, maybe? The film that brought them together, the film where they feel for each other, if that isn't too UNCOOL to bring up. Sorry, Heidi! Fun fact: Angelina Jolie and her girls flew out of LAX yesterday, presumably headed to London to meet up with Brad Pitt (photos here). Do you think it's possible that Justin and Jennifer might have run into Angelina, Shiloh and the Empress? Ooooooh. Did that image just give you a tingle? That would be incredible. Imagining Empress Z giving Justin Theroux a "Bitch, please" look is my new fantasy. Photos courtesy of Fame.

Kim Kardashian sues Old Navy over Reggie Bush’s Kim-look-alike girlfriend Posted: 21 Jul 2011 08:36 AM PDT Here are some new photos of Kim Kardashian and her GIANT fiancée Kris Humphries (typo spelling: Hump-phried) at some event in LA yesterday. The event is not important. What's important: Kim's cat-face, which isn't looking too bad here, and her GIANT fiancée. He's like an ogre compared to her. And what always surprises me about Kris is that he seems to genuinely like Kim. As I've said before, I don't think he's that bright. Here's a question: do you think that Kim actually gives a crap about Kris? I don't. I think he's willing and she just wants to be married. I think she's still obsessed with Reggie Bush. Case in point: Kim has just thrown a fit over an Old Navy commercial starring a Kim-look-alike named Melissa Molinaro. The commercials have been airing for months, so what's the big deal now? Oh, right. Melissa is dating Reggie now. A wedding isn’t the only thing on Kim Kardashian’s summertime agenda. On Wednesday, the reality star, 31, sued Old Navy and its parent company, the Gap Inc., in an L.A. court over a popular Old Navy ad featuring a Kim lookalike, singer-model Melissa Molinaro. Kardashian alleges that that the “Super C-U-T-E” ad, which began airing in February and became a YouTube phenomenon, violated her publicity rights — and that consumers may mistakenly believe Kardashian herself is endorsing Old Navy’s clothes. She seeks unspecified damages and wants to prevent Old Navy from using a lookalike in future ads. Explains a source close to the engaged reality star and mogul: “She’s protecting her brand ..She can’t let another brand use her image to sell clothes!” Indeed, the legal papers state that Kardashian “has invested substantial time, energy, finances and entrepreneurial effort in developing her considerable professional and commercial achievements and success, as well as in developing her popularity, fame, and prominence in the public eye.” “She’s a businesswoman who has to protect her brand,” the insider tells Us. “Bottom line.” As it happens, Old Navy ad star Molinaro is now dating Reggie Bush — Kardashian’s ex-beau, with whom she split in early 2010. [From Us Weekly] Yeah… I just watched the commercial again (below), and the chick just looks a hell of a lot like Kim, but it's not like Old Navy is claiming that she's in any way affiliated with Kardashian, Inc. Melissa just has a very similar cat-face, which makes me think that Reggie Bush is still obsessed with Kim as well. Maybe Kim's just mad because this song is WAY better than "Jam (Turn It Up)"? Photos courtesy of Fame.

Scarlett Johansson can never be alone, she’s trying to get with Justin Bartha now Posted: 21 Jul 2011 08:05 AM PDT Do you get the feeling that Scarlett Johansson is just one of those girls who can never be without a boyfriend/husband or major crush? She can't just BE. She's can't be alone, single and enjoying it for more than a week it feels like. I used to think she was just a maneater, taking whatever and whoever she wanted. Maybe she was at some point, but ever since Sean Penn dumped her, it feels like ScarJo has been flailing, physically, emotionally, and romantically. Sean moved on from ScarJo in a matter of minutes, boning randoms at the Cannes Film Festival, spending time with various actresses and models and generally looking and seeming completely over it. Scarlett seems determined to find another high-profile boyfriend, and it's looking like she flunked out with Justin Timberlake. So now she's turned her dong-seeking attentions to Justin Bartha, character actor and ex of Ashley Olsen. Scarlett Johansson may not be single for long after her split with Sean Penn — the stunning actress has been spotted cozying up to “Hangover” star Justin Bartha. Johansson, who split with Penn a month ago, attended the opening of off-Broadway’s “All New People,” in which Bartha stars, on Saturday, and the pair were photographed together backstage. Spies said Johansson and Bartha later seemed “completely engrossed in each other” during a cast dinner also attended by playwright Zach Braff and actress Heather Graham at Café Un Deux Trois. One witness told us, “There were about 15 people at the table, but Scarlett and Justin sat next to each other and talked all night. They seemed pretty fascinated with each other and only talked to each other. It looked sometimes flirty, but also they seemed to be involved in a deep discussion.” While some sources insist 26-year-old “Lost in Translation” star Johansson and Bartha, who turns 33 today, are just good friends — exactly what they previously said about ScarJo and Penn — she and Bartha were also reportedly seen “flirting up a storm” at Karaoke Boho here on Saturday. She split with Penn, 50, after five months in June. Bartha ended a two-year relationship with Ashley Olsen in March. Meanwhile, Scarlett’s ex-husband, Ryan Reynolds — recently linked to Charlize Theron — hung out with a brunette stunner at the Jimmy rooftop bar at the James Hotel in SoHo on Tuesday night. The pair were with two other friends, but another witness told us, “I definitely got the vibe that Ryan had eyes for the brunette. All four hung out the entire time together, but there was definitely chemistry between the two them. Lots of laughing and all smiles.” Reps for Johansson and Bartha didn’t get back to us. Reynolds’ rep had no comment. [From Page Six] I was going to declare this a downgrade, but I worried that I might offend the people who like Bartha. Bartha really doesn't seem like a bad guy at all - from what I've seen, he's a sweet guy, a little dorky, but charming and nice. He and Ashley kept their relationship very quiet, but there were no scandals around them and it's not like he was screwing around or anything. BUT… he's not exactly the kind of high-caliber, super-famous, A-list star that Scarlett tends to go for, right? In celebrity-land, she's dating down. And it just feels like she's flailing, once again. Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.

Jennifer Aniston brought Justin Theroux to London, just to party with her Posted: 21 Jul 2011 08:00 AM PDT My last post yesterday was about Jennifer Aniston's attendance at the Horrible Bosses premiere. She wore a dowdy Valentino that made her legs look stumpy, and she also wore possibly the worst pair of shoes I've ever seen on her. My focus was once again how little attention Jennifer's male costars and the actual LEADS of the film got because once again, the red carpet became The Jennifer Aniston Show. It's fine when she's the lead of the film, but I think it's weird that it keeps happening for Horrible Bosses, a film where she's, like, the fifth lead down? Anyway, I didn't even mention Jennifer's new homewrecked BOYFRIEND Justin Theroux, because I figured that Jennifer had just made this quick jaunt to London for - at most - a 48-hour promotional whirlwind, and surely she could be without her man for that long. Not so much! She made Justin Theroux come with her to London. These are photos where they're obviously looking couple-y, coming out The Shoreditch House. I guess it was a post-premiere party or something, and as you can see, it's not like they're hiding. Well, Jennifer tries to "hide" behind her clutch in one photo, but it's a laughably half-assed attempt. So here's the question: Why wasn't Justin her date to the premiere? She obviously asked him to come to London with her, and HIS trip to London seems to be all about Aniston, with no business there on his own. Jennifer just did the red carpet alone, and then made sure that she had a costume and hair change, then she and Justin walked hand-in-hand in front of the paparazzi at the post-premiere party. I mean, it's obvious they're together. Why not just walk the red carpet together? Why the game? Update for the Pity Party Patrol: As I’ve said many, many times before, I think Justin actually likes Jennifer and he’s into this, whatever it is. He probably didn’t have a problem going to London just to support Jennifer for a minor little promotional trip, but I just find it so odd that he came with her to London, but only went to the party and he didn’t walk the red carpet. It feels like Aniston has been playing these dumb games for so long, she doesn’t know how to behave when she actually gets a live one on the hook. By the way - Aniston introduced Justin to her father. According to Life & Style, the meeting went well. Of course it did. Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News & WENN.

Jennifer Lopez wanted to dump Marc Anthony last Christmas Posted: 21 Jul 2011 07:30 AM PDT Ugh, there are still a million stories about Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony. For a quick recap of our previous stories: Marc was crazy, controlling and jealous of Jennifer's fame; Marc wanted Jennifer to be a more conservative wife-type, and he hated when she wore sexy clothes; and Jennifer was such an insecure wreck that her mom emailed Ben Affleck to get HIS advice on what Jennifer should do. Now for the eleventy billion other stories: *Jennifer went to the Ukraine on Tuesday to perform at a private wedding. She got paid $1 million and she arrived with a gigantic entourage and stayed at the best penthouse suite. Sources say she was in a good mood, she was nice to everyone, she signed autographs and "smiled a lot." When she performed at the wedding, she said, "Are you happy? I am happy, because I am here with you today!” *Jennifer wanted to dump Marc as far back as Christmas 2010. They also stopped having sex, because Marc is obsessed with his fancy trainsets, and he would lock himself in his gigantic train room. Oh, and Marc was jealous of Jennifer's relationship with Steven Tyler. *Marc cheated on Jennifer with a stewardess he met on a private plane. A source tells Us Weekly, "Marc and Jennifer almost split up over it. Jennifer was going to leave him then, but Marc begged her to stay. They went to marriage counseling and she decided to give it another shot. He was someone she truly loved." Sources also claim that "Marc go out without his wedding ring and flirt with women in clubs in NYC and Las Vegas." *Also, Marc was a horrible businessman and he made terrible decisions acting on behalf of Jennifer. Marc was responsible for Jennifer firing Benny Medina (the man who developed Jennifer's career), and Marc was pissed when Jennifer hired Benny back. A source says: "Marc has always been a dominating husband. He wants to control everything Jennifer does, including her career. Jennifer feels like she hit her lowest point careerwise because of Marc's decisions. Marc was the king of bad decisions, but you couldn't say no to him or it would cause a big fight." *He was a crappy father, a source says: "She's a really hands on mom — so loving and nurturing while he seemed to feel bothered by [their twins]." *Marc is "aloof and visibly sad" in the wake of the split. Sources say that behind-the-scenes of his concert in Colombia, "He didn’t allow anyone to talk to him or anyone to come to his dressing room. The people who worked with him said he was a little bit upset, so because of that, they tried to keep everybody from him." When he wasn't performing, he just stayed in his hotel room and ordered room service. Do you think this is the end? It's not. This is going to go on for a while, especially when Jennifer gets a new boyfriend. Which should be happening any minute. Photos courtesy of WENN.

Prince Albert throws a hissy fit to the press about the state of marriage Posted: 21 Jul 2011 06:47 AM PDT The last we heard from poor Princess Charlene, she was being systematically reprogrammed by professional brain-washers at an undisclosed location while her new husband went on a sex tour of Africa on her second honeymoon. Charlene and Prince Albert's first honeymoon was marred by confirmed reports that they weren't even sleeping in the same hotel, and by the fact that Charlene basically looked like she was the most depressed princess in the world. Oh, and they had to cut their first honeymoon short (allegedly) because Albert had to return to Monaco to either take or get the results of the latest paternity test for a child he allegedly conceived while he and Charlene were together. There was apparently some concern that if Albert dealt with the paternity stuff in South Africa, Charlene would simply never return to Monaco with him. Anyway, the second honeymoon is over! Albert and Charlene are back in Monaco, officially, and they sat down with three press outlets to discuss how happy they are and how the media continues to print lies about them. Well, that's what Albert wanted to discuss, but I'm getting the feeling that Charlene just sat there and wept quietly as Albert spoke: The honeymoon is over – at least for the press. Dogged by persistent rumors that their early July wedding was not going to take place because of new revelations about the groom’s private life – and continuing press speculation concerning the nature of their marriage – Prince Albert and Princess Charlene of Monaco addressed representatives of three news outlets on Wednesday evening, only hours after the couple returned from their honeymoon. “We want to express our outrage about these rumors. It’s unbearable,” declared Albert, 53, reports Nice-Matin, one of those publications hastily summoned to meet with the newlyweds. The newspaper described the prince as “visibly … wounded.” “What is regrettable is that the media seized on these rumors without verifying their information,” complained Albert, as his bride sat beside him, holding his hand. “I find it unworthy of your colleagues. I have always respected the freedom of expression. But the dissemination of false information is lamentable and subject to criminal penalties.” Questions and speculation surrounding the couple’s marriage have been unparalleled in the French press since the week before their $50 million wedding in July. This includes charges that Charlene sought to flee the nuptials only to be stopped at the airport by Monaco officals – vehemently denied by the palace – as well as allegations that Albert has fathered another child out of wedlock. Despite palace attempts to deny rumors, the couple’s activities during the official South African portion of the honeymoon were also analyzed and subjected to tabloid rumor. “Sometimes these rumors made us smile, such as when the media explained that the princess and I had not slept in the same hotel in South Africa. It was for practical reasons of course,” Nice-Matin quotes Albert as saying. The couple’s extended July 9-20 honeymoon was “a wonderful stay,” said Albert. “We were not disturbed. It was a dreamy atmosphere.” Explaining what may have promoted the rumors, Albert said, “There are people in Monaco who seek to harm us.” He made no further comment and refused questions. During the royal audience, which was mostly conducted in French, Princess Charlene was asked whether she had anything to add. “No,” she replied in English. “I think that says it all.” [From People] “No,” she replied in English. “I think that says it all," she added, looking at the reporter, motioning to Albert and mouthing the words "HELP ME" while tapping out S-O-S in Morse Code with her fingernails. Seriously, it cannot be said enough: Poor, poor Princess Charlene. She was just being used as a prop for this interview, and it's just… sad. It's sad for both of them, really, but mostly for Charlene. I guess she's just going to stick it out, provide Albert with an heir and then GTFO. Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN.

Kate Winslet shills for St. John: “I’m not a model, I have a real shape” Posted: 21 Jul 2011 06:34 AM PDT I think it was last month when the first drips and drabs from Kate Winslet's new St. John campaign began to come out. I didn't pay much attention because A) Bitch got tweaked, and it upsets me that she's messed with her face and B) Kate is obsessed with putting herself out there as "the average girl with the average body." I mean, yeah, she's had some high-profile weight struggles, but she's also drop-dead gorgeous and one of the most talented actresses in the world. It feels like false humility at this point, Kate begging us to disagree with her when she utters lines like, "Obviously I am not a model, I don’t have a model’s body, I have a real shape." Anyway, Kate is the newest face of St. John, following in the footsteps of Angelina Jolie and Karen Elson, and Kate's behind-the-scenes, testimonial-type "commercial" has just been released. Kate says in part: "With St. John You can look extremely chic without trying too hard. You don’t feel as though they are clothes that only a model would be able to wear. And obviously I am not a model, I don’t have a model’s body, I have a real shape. And that just means a lot to me to be able to wear clothes that do embody that message of strength and power and femininity in a real shape….. I'm very much inspired by mothers, women who can pull it all together, do it all. Those are the women who are setting examples to a future generation of young women and that’s what I’m trying to do for my daughter." [Via The Mail] Here's the commercial: A few things - I get the point about her saying she has a "real shape," although I disagree with the idea that one woman's body is more REAL than another's. She's trying to reach out to St. John's consumers, women who are more "real" because they aren't a size zero, I suppose. But here's my thought on Kate's "real shape" in too many St. John's clothes: they're much too clingy for Kate to go without Spanx. Did anyone else notice that? There are lots of dresses that cling to every bump and lump on a woman's body, and really, those dresses aren't flattering on Kate. Which defeats the purpose of using her as a spokesmodel. But the pants, coats and blouses are pretty on her. She should just avoid the clingy dresses. Last point: Kate's "modelface" is very close to most women's' "bitchfaces". Ads courtesy of St. John.

Sarah Palin about to become a grandmother for the second time Posted: 21 Jul 2011 06:13 AM PDT I will admit to barely having a passing interest in this story, but two of you e-mailed it to me saying we’d called it earlier, so there must be interest in it. (Thank you to Bellaluna and xxodettexx!) Sarah Palin’s oldest son, Track, 22, married his high school sweetheart in a small private ceremony two months ago. The couple announced that they would have a larger ski party weekend this winter so that more friends and family could celebrate with them. I guessed that Track’s new bride, Britta Hanson, 21, might be pregnant due to the quickie wedding but thought that a ski weekend in seven months didn’t make sense given the timeline. Like why would they plan a ski trip right after she’d had the baby? Maybe because the baby will be a few months old by then. One of Britta’s friends posted a photo of her on Facebook where she’s sitting on a bed surrounded by presents. [via Gawker] It looks like a baby shower and Britta looks at least seven months along, so it was a shotgun wedding. At least one of Sarah Palin’s grandchildren will be born into wedlock, since that seems to matter to her. Sarah Palin is going to be a grandmother again. Eldest child Track Palin married high school sweetheart Britta Hanson two months ago, and now we hear that Britta is pregnant. The picture above of “Britta Pie,” which was posted on a Wasilla friend’s Facebook wall, confirms the news she’s expecting. Britta looks to be several months along—perhaps more than two months? Track and Britta married at the ages of 22 and 21, at a ceremony on their favorite ski slope. Wedding pictures and a jubilant “joint statement” appeared in People magazine. Track is an Army reservist who served in Iraq; Britta is the daughter of a minister who was studying to be a nurse as of last year. Britta’s friends responded to the Facebook pictures with elation. But given the timing of Britta’s pregnancy, the happy couple may want to tell Sarah Palin to shut up the next time she champions abstinence-only education or Bristol sermonizes against extramarital sex, lest the conception of another Palin grandchild and the rationale behind another well-publicized Palin marriage fall into question. [From Gawker] Now comes the business of naming that baby, as we speculated about in the last story. Sarah has a three year-old son named Trig and her grandson, Tripp, is two and a half. You know they’re going to name that child something that starts with “Tr” if it’s a boy. I suggested Truth nd some of your name ideas included: Trigger, Trapp, Trollop, Tramp, Trance, Trail, and Truce. That last one would be ironic, which would be lost to Sarah Palin. I’m kind of loving that she’s a two time grandmother at 47. There’s got to be something at least slightly humbling about that, although her single response to every uncomfortable emotion is “offended.” Congratulations to these kids though. Facebook Photos via Gawker Other photos credit: Fame

Celine Dion gets “Ridiculous Pictures of Celine Dion” website shut down Posted: 21 Jul 2011 06:00 AM PDT Many celebrities get a kick out of the memes and websites that have built up around them. Keanu Reeves was so gracious, smart and funny when a reporter asked him about him the “Sad Keanu” meme, saying “That's funny. So they like take paparazzi pictures and re-contextualize them?… It sounds like harmless, good clean fun.” Justin Bieber, although young and prone to mild douchiness and stupidity, is similarly positive about the Lesbians Who Look like Justin Bieber website, and laughed about it and called it “funny.” Even George Clooney thought the hate groups about him on Facebook were funny and poked fun at himself when a reporter showed them to him. So it’s standard for celebrities to laugh off websites and memes started by fans, even when they’re not entirely positive. Not Celine Dion, though. She just had a Tumblr featuring photos where she was making bad faces shut down. Touchy much? FURIOUS Celine Dion has allegedly SHUT DOWN a tribute Tumblr site because she didn't like the unflattering images they featured, according to site. The Tumblr page, Ridiculous Pictures of Celine Dion, removed all images and posted a notice Tuesday announcing that her lawyers sent them a notice to close immediately. Administrators of the website say they are Celine "superfans" and cannot afford a legal battle with the wealthy singer over their fair use claims. From RPCD: hey y'all céline dion found our blog, and she didn't like it. we just got a letter from céline's lawyers that the blog has to be shut down. though this blog is well within the realm of 'fair use', i don't have the money or time to get a lawyer to respond. the dream is over. thanks for following and being a céline superfan i'll always remember u i'll never let go [From Tabloid Prodigy, RPCD, via The Frisky] I like Celine so I’ll chalk this up to someone not really “getting” the Internet and not understanding that it’s meant in good fun. Maybe her lawyers are doing it without her knowledge. Still, it must be annoying to see a website dedicated to terrible pictures of yourself. Someone should do this to Liz Hurley, although she’d have to be able to move her face first. Thanks to Tabloid Prodigy for these gifs of Celine pulling faces. This website was a valuable public service. Some photos credit: WENN.com.

Chelsea Handler’s old drinking buddy: “Every time… drugs were involved.” Posted: 21 Jul 2011 05:45 AM PDT Radar Online has an interview with a woman who hung out with Chelsea Handler back when Chelsea was supposedly 21 or 22, which would have been 15 years ago according to how old Chelsea claims she is. The woman, Morgain McGovern, told stories about how Chelsea did a lot of drugs including Ecstasy and cocaine. She recounted a scene where Chelsea was hoovering up coke at a party, comparing her to a “blonde anteater.” McGovern admits that “I don’t know if [Chelsea is] still partying now.” (Although it’s safe to assume since Chelsea sure looks like it.) Then McGovern told a secondhand story about how a friend told her they saw Chelsea 2-3 years ago “by herself, drinking a bottle of vodka in her own private booth” in a club. Tell me something I don’t know that’s not part of the story Chelsea shills about herself constantly. Here’s the story from Radar, and there’s a video at the source. Chelsea Handler has made no secret of her penchant for alcohol, but a revealing on-camera interview with one of her former friends has lifted the lid on the depths of her destructive lifestyle. Morgain McGovern gives a shocking look into the wild partying which she says almost killed her, in an exclusive interview with RadarOnline.com. “I’ve done pharmaceutical grade ecstasy twice in my life and both times she was involved,” said McGovern, who was friends with the late night talk show host and comedian in 2003 and claims they did cocaine and ecstasy on a regular basis. “I thought, I am going to die, I’m going to die if I hang out with these girls.” McGovern — who eventually moved away and is now clean and sober — says she doesn’t know if Handler, 36, is still doing drugs, but believes she is still drinking heavily. “Someone should have staged an intervention,” she said. “Every time we went out, drugs were involved.” McGovern is currently penning a book, The Traveling Roadshow Of The Countess Maritsa, about her life as the daughter of a con artist mother. [From Radar] I really dislike Chelsea, I find her unfunny and rude. Normally I would be amused by stories like this. It’s lame though to dish on things people did in their early twenties. (Or probably late 20s in Chelsea’s case. Still it was over ten years ago.) If any of my partying buddies from college decided to spread crap about me I’m sure they’d have crazy stories about stuff I barely remember. (Not that I was as bad as this person claims Chelsea was, but still.) This is just a woman trying to capitalize on an acquaintance with someone famous. Surprise - she’s writing a book and probably doesn’t have any publishers or literary agents interested so she’s doing it this way. This is probably the most interesting story she has. Chelsea is shown on 7/7/11. Credit: WENN.com

You are subscribed to email updates from Cele|bitchy To stop receiving these emails, you may unsubscribe now.	Email delivery powered by Google
Google Inc., 20 West Kinzie, Chicago IL USA 60610