Cele|bitchy |
- Mel Gibson turned himself in for booking, missed premiere of ‘The Beaver’
- Orlando Bloom: “I always like the smell of a woman, the neck, behind the ear”
- Hot Guy St. Patrick’s Day: Shamrock dongs
- Sandra Bullock donated $1 million to the Red Cross for Japanese relief
- The Hilton clan, including Kim, Kyle and Paris’ mom Kathy, go to paparazzi filled dinner
- Tiger Woods is on his Rehabilitation Tour: have you forgiven him?
- Katie Holmes actually wears something that I kind of like
- LeAnn Rimes defends her emaciated body: “I am completely healthy!”
- Justin Timberlake’s infidelities detailed by Us Weekly in list-form
- Will Lindsay Lohan’s probation report reveal alcohol consumption?
| Mel Gibson turned himself in for booking, missed premiere of ‘The Beaver’ Posted: 17 Mar 2011 09:04 AM PDT
Last night, Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster's film The Beaver premiered at the SXSW Film Festival. Jodie was there. Mel was not. I read that Mel wasn't down there early this morning, and I thought it was just an attempt by the studio releasing The Beaver (ugh, "releasing the beaver") to avoid any additional controversy. Nope. Mel wasn't at the premiere because he was turning himself into the authorities, like he had been ordered. Last week, he pled "no contest" to battery, and had been sentenced to 16 hours of community service, 52 weeks of counseling, and three years of what TMZ calls "informal probation" - I think they made that up? Is "informal probation" a real thing? Isn't it just "probation or GTFO"? Anyway, Mel turned himself into the El Segundo Police Department, and he was fingerprinted and photographed once again. If you'd like to see his latest booking photo, go here. TMZ calls it "angry". I still think he looks drugged, though. Somebody prescribed Mel some drugs to help even out his hysterical mood swings. Let's see, what else? He weighs 190 pounds, and he's five foot 10 inches. Here's a question - do you think Mel was trying to passively aggressively screw with Jodie Foster? The timing is too weird - Jodie premieres The Beaver on the same night that Mel turns himself in? Or is this all some kind of grand publicity campaign that I'm just not understanding? Even if Mel's timing is sketchy, though, I doubt Jodie will mind. After all, she loves and adores his sensitive soul.
Photos courtesy of WENN. |
| Orlando Bloom: “I always like the smell of a woman, the neck, behind the ear” Posted: 17 Mar 2011 08:24 AM PDT
These are some new photos of Orlando Bloom, promoting his new gig in London. Orly has become the new "face" of Hugo Boss's fragrance for men, Boss Orange Man, which seems like a completely random name for a cologne. Orly is joined (in spirit) by the face of Boss Orange Woman, Sienna Miller. I have to say… Orly needs the gig. Even though he's gotten some film roles here and there over the past year, Orly needed to get his face out there in some kind of professional setting. So that's why he looks so nice in these photos - he's happy to be working. Orly also sat down for an interview with Elle UK at the event:
[From Elle UK] He's really rather harmless, isn't he? He's not a bad guy, he's just not super-talented or anything. And yes, I know I'm bringing the wrath of the Orly-loonies on my head for that one, but honestly, I could say much worse. Besides, I'm liking Orlando more and more these days now that he's a dad. He seems… calmer and sweeter. Here's the ad for Boss Orange Man:
Photos courtesy of WENN. |
| Hot Guy St. Patrick’s Day: Shamrock dongs Posted: 17 Mar 2011 07:52 AM PDT
Jonathan Rhys Meyers. Happy St. Patrick's Day, y'all. I hope we're publishing this one early enough that you're (relatively) sober. Probably not! In any case, pour yourself a whiskey and enjoy the Irish dong, in honor of Saint Patrick, who… did something, I'm sure. I think he boned a shamrock. Blasphemy? Not on this, The High Holy Day of Irish Dong. To get things started, we start with the raging id of Jonathan Rhys Meyers. He's perfect, and a perfect disaster. Beautiful, talented, sexy, and one of the most self-destructive men to ever grace the screen (and that's saying a lot). On this day, however, we shall overlook his faults and embrace his lovely Irish Dong. Plus, JRM is consistently one of our most requested men. You bitches love the damaged, pretty ones.
Colin Farrell. (By CB) Oh Colin, you’re not a good boyfriend by any stretch but you’re just so charming and we can’t get your sex tape out of our heads. We know you like to go downtown and after such a graphic reminder it’s quite easy to picture you doing the same to us. It’s too bad you’re such a manipulative player.
Cillian Murphy. Whenever I include Cillian, I always talk about how sexy he is, but that bitches who go to bed with him should always keep their guard up because he looks like the kind of guy who might stab a ho, mid-thrust. That's unfair (but probably true). Still… he's so, so pretty, isn't he?
Daniel Day Lewis. DDL is perfection. Can you believe that CB used to not find him attractive? For me, he's one of those men whose voice is enough. His natural voice - a soft English accent (he's British and Irish) - is compelling and sexy. But he can do pretty much any accent, and he's sexy with all of them. Plus, I genuinely like the way he looks. Tall, lanky guys = my kryptonite. Did you see Nine? He was surprisingly wonderful in Nine. I loved when he was dancing and doing those acrobatics. Plus, he was genuinely sexy with every one of his leading ladies. Except Nicole Kidman. But including Judi Dench.
Stuart Townsend. I used to think Stuart was the poor man's Colin Farrell, but I don't think that anymore. Colin is all dirty and damaged and vulnerable and crazy, where Stuart seems well-adjusted, sweet, funny, not damaged, and genuinely nice. The only thing I really remember seeing Stuart in was his guest spot on Will & Grace, years ago. He was so funny and sexy! I wish he worked more.
Gabriel Byrne. (By CB) Kaiser asked me to do Gabriel Byrne (gladly!) and at first I didn’t know what to say, except that he stars on HBO’s In Treatment and is known for The Usual Suspects and Miller’s Crossing. Then I remembered hearing his sexy, educated but not pompous in any way voice on Fresh Air and imagining that it was Colin Farrel. When I figured out it was Gabriel Bryne a couple of minutes in I was so intrigued because it was one of the most interesting interviews I’d ever heard. His thoughtful nature and depth really turned me on. Byrne explained on Fresh Air that he’d spent several years in seminary training to be a priest before he decided it wasn’t for him. I think I speak for countless people when I say how glad I am that he became an actor instead.
Aidan Quinn (By CB) I swooned and cried over Aidan in 1999’s This is My Father but after that his film career as a leading man kind of fizzled, although he’s worked steadily since and done a lot of TV work. He’s still gorgeous and looks at least ten years younger at 52. The first photo of him below is from February. Quinn is technically American in that he was born in the US, in Chicago, but both his parents are Irish, so it counts!
Kenneth Branagh. (By CB) Both Kaiser and I thought that Branagh was English for sure, but he’s not, he’s Irish! He was born in Belfast, Northern Ireland and lived in Ireland until he was nine, when he moved to England and learned to sound like a little English kid. This man can act and we’ve seen painfully little of him lately. He’ll be in the upcoming movie My Week with Marilyn, though, and will be playing Sir Lawrence Olivier. Sounds perfect.
Pierce Brosnan. Pierce is the man. One look from those eyes and your biscuits will "rise" you know? And he loves his wife, passionately. And he's a much better actor than most of us expected. I love him.
Liam Neeson. (By CB) I saw Liam on stage in The Crucible in New York with Lara Linney in 2002 I think. He was so tall and commanding. Liam comes across as world weary and vulnerable, like you want to just soothe him. He’s a devoted dad and a handsome, thoughtful man who has gone through so much. And I’ve heard he’s very well endowed.
Michael Fassbender. I’ve detailed my Fassbender obsession time and time again. It’s full-blown, at this point. Gerard Butler is completely jealous, and Clive Owen keeps sending me dirty letters. But my Fass-love rages. He’s Irish and German, by the way. I get the feeling he didn’t have much of a relationship with his German father, but was raised by his mom, his sister and his grandmother in Ireland. I know this because eventually he will introduce me to his family, when he proposes to me. I’ve used all of these photos (and the video) before, but I will. Not. Stop. Until you too LOVE the Fassdong.
Damien Rice. I love Damien Rice. SOOOO much. I love that he’s a ginger, and I love that we’re ending this on the two Irish gingers (Fassie and Rice). So, enjoy. I’ve added my favorite Damien Rice song too, “Coconut Skins”.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame, PRPhotos, Vanity Fair, GQ, Details, Esquire, Entertainment Weekly, Google Images. |
| Sandra Bullock donated $1 million to the Red Cross for Japanese relief Posted: 17 Mar 2011 07:47 AM PDT
These are new photos of Sandra Bullock leaving her house in New York City. I think Sandra and Louis have been spending a lot of time in New York lately, for whatever reason. And it's the only city they seem to get consistently pap'd in. I think Sandy looks really good in these photos - she looks healthy and content, and I like that she even gives the paparazzi a smile. So classy. In addition to getting back to work, hanging out in New York with her son, and generally being cool (and maybe being a lesbian too, of course), Sandra also donated one million dollars to the Red Cross, to help support the people of Japan:
[From Entertainment Tonight] Yes, and Sandra has given to all of the big tragedies over the years - Katrina and the Gulf Coast, 9/11, the 2004-05 Tsunami. She's a giver. She's got a good heart. In other Sandy news, In Touch Weekly (via Jezebel) is reporting that Jennifer Aniston is trying desperately to throw Sandy a big pity party. According to the tabloid, Sandy and Aniston are "bonding over their breakups” and Aniston and Courteney Cox have invited Sandra to be part of their First Wives Club. God, I really hope that isn't true. To make a donation to the International Red Cross, go here.
Photos courtesy of Fame. |
| The Hilton clan, including Kim, Kyle and Paris’ mom Kathy, go to paparazzi filled dinner Posted: 17 Mar 2011 07:44 AM PDT
Judging from these photos, Kim and Kathy are doing fine but Kyle is still being standoffish with Kim despite Kim’s attempts at being conciliatory where she had nothing to be sorry for. We’ve heard that all the members of the first season of RHOBH will be returning next season, so I’m sure we’ll see more of Kyle treating Kim like crap. And we’ll soon see Paris, Kathy and maybe a little of Nicky on whatever reality show they have brewing with Charlie Sheen’s ex wife, Brooke Mueller. I doubt it will be half as interesting or drama-filled as RHOBH. It probably won’t even do half as well as that Kardashian mess, as much as I can’t stand those people. Paris is old news now. So who do you think arranged this little paparazzi outing? Kyle, right?
Photo credit: Fame Pictures          |
| Tiger Woods is on his Rehabilitation Tour: have you forgiven him? Posted: 17 Mar 2011 07:16 AM PDT
Tiger Woods was in New York yesterday, and these are the photos of him wandering around, probably trolling for HoJo's waitresses. Wait, is Rachel Uchitel in New York now? Or is she in Vegas? Unknown. Anyway, Tiger is doing press for some reason. Last night he was on Jimmy Fallon, and this morning her went on Good Morning America. I guess these are the first steps for Tiger's rehabilitation tour?
[From People] Here are several questions: Do you buy Tiger's "I'm repentant, I can laugh at myself, forgive me" rehabilitation tour? Do Tiger should be forgiven, considering everyone involved in his saga was a consenting adult? I'll admit, I don't feel rage towards Tiger, like I do with people like Mel Gibson or Lindsay Lohan. Tiger has hurt people emotionally - his ex-wife, his mistresses, his fans - but the only illegal thing he really did was hire hookers, right? And all of the Ambien sex, of course. Oh, and he crashed his car, probably while under the influence of something. But all in all, there are other celebrities who are much more deserving of scorn, in my opinion. I don't know… I still think he's a tool, but he's pretty harmless too. Unless you're sleeping with him.
Photos courtesy of Fame. |
| Katie Holmes actually wears something that I kind of like Posted: 17 Mar 2011 06:55 AM PDT
I am a connoisseur of sweaters. My latest sweater loves are shawl sweater coats, with only two button closures and no tie at the waist. I got the sweaters in a pale green and black - I wore the black one when CB and I went to see True Grit. Now, I didn't know that Katie Holmes did sweater coats, but here she is in New York last night, wearing a chocolate brown cable-knit sweater coat. I like the IDEA of this sweater much more than the execution. Plus, I think Katie should go down one size, because it's kind of overwhelming her. And the excess ribbing is overwhelming me. More cable, less ribbing. Still… I want a chocolate brown cable sweater coat! Also - are we going to talk about how Katie looks high as a kite? No? Okay. Hate the shoes too. Last thing: Katie has been all over New York, getting pap'd constantly because she's hard at work selling her clothing line, Holmes & Yang. According to Page Six, the Kate-bot "is making an aggressive push to retailers for her Holmes & Yang clothing line, which she launched in 2009 with her stylist, Jeanne Yang. On Tuesday, the two kicked off a series of trunk shows for their spring and fall lines at Barneys, which has carried their collection for two seasons. It remained a mystery as to whether Holmes’ daughter, Suri, contributes in any way to the line, as reporters were told by handlers that questions about the cute youngster were forbidden." With this zombie face as the "face" of your clothing line, would you expect it sell? No. Beyond that, Katie is a crap fashion designer.
Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN. |
| LeAnn Rimes defends her emaciated body: “I am completely healthy!” Posted: 17 Mar 2011 06:19 AM PDT
[From People] Look, I know a lot of you hate LeAnn, and in all fairness to her haters, LeAnn has given all of you lots and lots of ammunition. She's a hyper-narcissist, a self-obsessed egomaniacal drama queen nut job who has destroyed her career and any goodwill any of us might have her a long, long time ago. That being said, I've started to feel a twinge of pity for LeAnn, much as I have lately felt a twinge for Gwyneth. That's the thing about self-absorbed, delusional bitches - once the veil comes down, all of sudden they seem fragile, physically and mentally. LeAnn's freakishly emaciated body is a cry for help, even if she's too much of a ridiculous a–hole to acknowledge it. Maybe if we let it go, she'll actually eat (without purging).
Photos courtesy of WENN.        |
| Justin Timberlake’s infidelities detailed by Us Weekly in list-form Posted: 17 Mar 2011 06:18 AM PDT
I've just been skimming Us Weekly's full cover story this week, all about Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel's breakup, and it is truly disturbing. Us Weekly released a just-the-basics summary yesterday (you can read my coverage of it here), but the bulk of the print article is simply detailed accounts of all of Justin's hookups while he was "with" Jessica. There are A LOT. I'm just going to do the highlights:
[From Us Weekly, print edition] OK! Magazine also has something about Mila and Justin and how they totally did NOT have anything physical or emotional, but OK! Magazine says it's because Mila doesn't want to be like Angelina Jolie. Because Mila played the young Gia Carrangi and Angelina played the older Gia, get it? Anyway, some marketing genius decided that this was the right time to release new, even more sexed-up trailer for Mila and Justin's Friends With Benefits. I have to admit, I actually smiled briefly at two parts of this: It looks cuter than that Natalie Portman-Ashton Kutcher junk.
Photos courtesy of Fame & WENN. |
| Will Lindsay Lohan’s probation report reveal alcohol consumption? Posted: 17 Mar 2011 06:18 AM PDT
TMZ has one of the most asinine Lindsay Lohan stories this morning. For the past week, TMZ has been taking a different angle with their Linnocent coverage - they've stopped being so utterly sycophantic towards The Family Crackhead, and started pushing Linnocent to take the plea deal. The day after Linnocent's last court trip, TMZ published a story about how her probation report (which is supposed to be confidential) is even "worse" than we know - and that it contains particularly damning information that would potentially ensure Lindsay a jail sentence. This morning, TMZ has an item that they say will be included on the probation report: that Lindsay was drinking that stupid Kombacha tea, the kind with .5% alcohol, while she was wearing her SCRAM. And that's the SCANDAL:
[From TMZ] Um, didn't the crack headed bitch actually get DRUNK while she was wearing her SCRAM? Yeah. It was the night of the MTV Awards last summer. Linnocent claimed someone poured a drink on her, but really she was swilling vodka. And after that, Linnocent was snorting cocaine too. We know all of this. Why is TMZ making such a big deal about the tea? She’s probably snorting lines and doing shots as we speak. Oh, and Lindsay's latest john/"producer" has been giving a bunch of interviews to Radar about how LINNOCENT is completely the victim of everything, always and forever. I suggest you read this in the manner I'm offering it: as comedic relief.
[From Radar] How hammered did he sound? Linnocent must give really good (paid) blow jobs.
Photos courtesy of WENN. |
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