Best Week Ever |
- Chloe Sevigny Does Impression Of Youtube Impression Of Chloe Sevigny
- Cat, Rat, Dog, Sunglasses And Chair All Live Happily Together
- ADORABLE TOWNE: Standup With A Baby
- FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: The 2011 Oscars
- Corey Haim Finally Gets The Tribute That Those Pretentious Jerks Who Run The Oscars Neglected To Give Him
- Look Who’s In The Oscars Luxury Lounge
- Next Die Hard Movie To Go In New Direction
- RoboCop Himself Lobbies For The Detroit RoboCop Statue
- Baby Cracks Up At Ripped Paper, Provides Nice Contrast To Past 24 Hours
- Colin Firth Has A Brother Who Looks Like Him + Fart Smell
- Our 20 Favorite Tweets From The 2011 Oscars
| Chloe Sevigny Does Impression Of Youtube Impression Of Chloe Sevigny Posted: 01 Mar 2011 09:21 AM PST If you haven’t seen the “Chloe” Youtube videos, go watch them all now, they’re one of the best things the internet (and I only enjoy, like, 4 things on the internet anymore, and three of them are different Google Maps and one is Kelsey Grammer falling). If you have seen the Chloe Youtube videos, or you just watched them now, then proceed to watch the following meta- Web 7.0 mindgame, a Youtube video of the actual Chloe Sevigny doing an accurate impression of Drew Droege’s inaccurate-but-accurate impression of her. I’m pretty sure we’re all getting Inception’d. FINE INTERNET – I’ll sell you my dad’s oil company. (via Urlesque) |
| Cat, Rat, Dog, Sunglasses And Chair All Live Happily Together Posted: 01 Mar 2011 08:05 AM PST From Splash: “The harmonious inter-species dog-cat-rat family are the family of Animal Whisperer Brian Cottrill. The happy animals all reside in Venice, California where Brian hopes his displays of effective animal training and psychology will help the reputation of his beloved pit bull terriers.”
As if the dog in sunglasses wouldn’t have been enough. What a cool dog. Anyway, that trainer, Brian Cotrill, seems like an awesome guy. I bet he has a smile plastered permanently to his face. No?
Oh, yeah, no. Wow. That face could not be less congruous with the surroundings. Even his power laces and the man in the foreground offering him a treat aren’t enough to make this guy happy. What’s it going to take, Brian?! |
| ADORABLE TOWNE: Standup With A Baby Posted: 01 Mar 2011 07:45 AM PST Here’s a brief glimpse into the life of single-dad comedian Eddie Decker (Rob Lathan) whose desire to do standup slightly conflicts with his obligation to take care of his newborn daughter. The result? BABY STANDUP. I basically just aww-laughed at the baby’s face for three minutes. I should probably get one of those, I’d be constantly amused (long-term plan!) Also, I realize the standup jokes are intentionally funny-bad for the purposes of the character, but I think I laughed at every one of them – I’m not an accurate barometer of good things, if you haven’t noticed yet. |
| FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION: The 2011 Oscars Posted: 28 Feb 2011 04:22 PM PST
MY 14 YEAR OLD SELF IS SECRETLY CUTTING OUT OF JEALOUSY
PHOTO TAKEN MOMENTS BEFORE DOUGLAS’ EARLOBE BODYSLAMMED THIS DUDE
MOST SUBLIMINAL FEMININE DEODORANT SPRAY AD
IMAGE WAITING TO GET A PENIS PHOTOSHOPPED INTO IT (NOT SO MUCH REQUEST AS IT IS DEMAND)
CUTEST!!!
“I’M JUST DANDYIEST”
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| Posted: 28 Feb 2011 05:06 PM PST
Whether or not you believe that the 2011 Oscars were the worst thing since sliced bread*, there is one thing that we can all agree on. Someone in the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences needs to pay (and pay dearly) for snubbing Corey Haim during last night’s Since those jerks at the Academy had the unmitigated gall to dis our favorite Dreamer of Little Dreams, we figured that we’d put together the tribute to Corey Haim that he so richly deserves.
Awww, Lukoplakia! Lucas wasn’t Corey Haim’s first movie, but it was the film that established him as a sensitive dreamer in the eyes of millions of teenage girls in the mid-eighties. He hadn’t yet morphed into full hunk status, but that didn’t stop Winona Ryder from eye-f#!%ing him somethin’ FIERCE at the end of that movie.
Before Bieber was even a tingly feeling in his teenage father’s bathing suit area, Corey Haim (and, to a lesser extent, his Lost Boys wingman Corey Feldman) was appearing on the cover of Tiger Beat, doing prodigious amounts of blow and scoring with the hottest teen chicks of the late eighties (Alyssa Milano, Nicole Eggert, etc.). For this ALONE he should’ve snagged a mention from those jealous jackanapes at the Academy.
Oh yeah, we forgot, he was also tapping Heather Graham YEARS before she was Rollergirl. Give the man some credit, Academy snobs.
Yes, Corey let drugs, alcohol and more drugs get the best of him for the better part of 20 years. There’s a lesson to be learned there, no diggity, no doubt. But even though his looks had faded, he couldn’t help but look beatific in this trade ad he took out trying to convince Hollywood to give him a second chance. I mean, look at the guy. How can you not want to at least let him audition for your movie?
Even though 99% of the scumbags who rule Hollywood viewed Haim as nothing short of a leper, the directing pair of Neveldine/Taylor cast Corey in what would be his last major motion picture (meaning, something that didn’t go straight to Netflix Instant), Crank: High Voltage. And guess what? He OWNS in it! Sorry that you caught such a raw deal, Corey. Even though you got snubbed by those pompous jerks who run AMPAS, you can look down from upon your killer afterlife manse knowing that there are thousands, if not MILLIONS, of us who will never forget your status as one of the dreamiest teen idols of all-time. Rest in peace, bro. *We prefer to eat bread one loaf at a time. To paraphrase Charlie Sheen**, slices are for p_ssys. |
| Look Who’s In The Oscars Luxury Lounge Posted: 28 Feb 2011 02:33 PM PST As we all know from But check out who, of all people, made it into the 2011 Oscars Luxury Lounge:
I have no idea what Stanley from The Office is doing at a movie awards show in the first place (besides being bored by it right it was bad up top!), but strolling into the luxury lounge and grabbing a giant free Heineken bottle is the Stanliest thing Stanley could ever Stanley, so in a way it also makes perfect sense. Nicely Stanned. [Full Disclosure: Seeing this pic three years ago, I would've been like "THE OFFICE!!" Now I'm like, "The Office." Not entirely sure what this means, but it's not just that I use fewer caps.] |
| Next Die Hard Movie To Go In New Direction Posted: 28 Feb 2011 12:40 PM PST
Yeah, there’s no new Die Hard movie. This is all just an excuse to post a picture of Bruce Willis posing with Goofy and Minnie Mouse on a Disney trip he took yesterday. Interesting thing to note: if things were to work out between Bruce Willis and Minnie Mouse, Bruce Willis would then be to Mickey Mouse what Ashton Kutcher is now to Bruce Willis. Thanks, Splash Photos. |
| RoboCop Himself Lobbies For The Detroit RoboCop Statue Posted: 28 Feb 2011 12:30 PM PST As the city of Detroit decides whether or not to erect a long-overdue statue of RoboCop, it’s time we heard from one of the more directly-involved voices in the RoboCop statue debate: RoboCop himself. Well, not the real RoboCop, it’s actor Peter Weller who portrayed RoboCop in the film, not the real-life cop Alex Murphy who literally became a cyborg after he was shot and had a movie based on his life. RoboCop, surprisingly, is in favor of the statue, and makes an extremely articulate argument in its favor: |
| Baby Cracks Up At Ripped Paper, Provides Nice Contrast To Past 24 Hours Posted: 28 Feb 2011 11:27 AM PST The past 24 hours have no doubt left us all more cynical and jaded than ever. There was last night’s Oscars. There were this morning’s Charlie Sheen interviews. Actually, those might have just been the same thing. No one can be positive that last night’s Oscars weren’t just cocaine fever dream inside of Charlie Sheen’s mind. Either way, we could all use a break from terrible. Remember. It is not written that we, as humans, must have award shows and drug fueled sit com stars. The video below is our future. Let’s all pin our hopes on this baby growing up and fixing all of this. Yeah. We’re gonna be okay. Thanks, The Daily What. |
| Colin Firth Has A Brother Who Looks Like Him + Fart Smell Posted: 28 Feb 2011 10:40 AM PST Perhaps I’ve been a little too forthcoming regarding our love for Academy Award winning actor and star of
Jesus C, he looks exactly like what Colin Firth would look like if he was smelling a freshly sprung fart. I actually think the word for “freshly sprung fart” is a “firth,” so perhaps the world is full circling itself in front of our very eyes. His name is Jonathan Firth. He is an actor in his 30s. That is all I know about him. Oh, and in case you think the Firthy fart smell face is exclusive to the above photo, I bring you one more — a publicity still no less — that supports our Firth theory ahead. Fart smell or no fart smell, I would still defffffffffinitely talk to him.
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| Our 20 Favorite Tweets From The 2011 Oscars Posted: 28 Feb 2011 10:10 AM PST |
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