Cele|bitchy |
- Bradley Cooper wants his mom to move in with him: sweet or creepy?
- Hot Guy Friday: Clash of the Dongs
- Kelly Brook’s hourglass figure in a bikini: gorgeous, aspirational or not your type?
- Jennifer Love Hewitt steps out in sweats and a t-shirt, tries hiding behind a little purse
- From the Desk of Clive Owen (and Michael Fassbender too?)
- Enquirer: Sara Gilbert and her partner broke up and are trying to split custody
- Halle Berry trots out her hostage, Olivier Martinez, so they’re not done… yet
- Victoria Beckham: Harper Seven is “the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen”
- John Mayer is trying to win Jennifer Aniston back, since she’s taken now
- George Clooney never wants to let a woman get her hands on his ass(ets)
Bradley Cooper wants his mom to move in with him: sweet or creepy? Posted: 15 Jul 2011 08:45 AM PDT You may not be much of a fan of Bradley Cooper’s acting (personally, I can take him or leave him in that regard), but it’s hard to not admire the fact that he’s stayed close to his parents even though he’s a big movie star now. The above photo shows Bradley taking his parents out to lunch last August. Sadly, his father passed away in January, and now Bradley wants to take care of his mom, so he’s invited her to move to Los Angeles and live in his house at least on a temporary but possibly an ongoing basis. Sweet, right?
[From Enquirer, print edition, July 25] Of course, if Bradley’s mom accepts and commences living with her son, there’s another potential benefit for Bradley, who has given off strong vibes of wanting to concentrate on his career after ending a long-term relationship with Renee Zellweger. That is, chicks are much less likely to hang all over him a guy there’s the strong possiblity that a cozy night at home could end with an embarrassing interruption from mom. So this is not only a great way for Bradley to take care of the woman who raised him but also to ward off all of those actresses that won’t take “no” for an answer. And perhaps the tabloids will stop linking him to every Hollywood starlet in existence. No more Scarlett Johansson, Olivia Wilde, Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Biel, or Zoe Saldana rumors. See how easy that would be? This is total win-win situation. Update: Thanks to those commenters who pointed out that Bradley is not 26 but 36. Photos courtesy of Fame and WENN |
Hot Guy Friday: Clash of the Dongs Posted: 15 Jul 2011 08:15 AM PDT Ralph Fiennes. I decided to make Ralph the headliner Hot Guy this week because of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the very end, the last time Ralph will ever be Lord Voldemort. Some would lead with Daniel Radcliffe, or the ginger, or even Alan Rickman. No offense to them, but I love a great villain. I love an actor who chews the scenes and really hams it up when he goes bad. Or maybe I just love Ralph… could be. I just find his face so beautiful, and I always have. Here's to another 20 years of crushing hard on Ralph! Joseph Fiennes. Why not another Fiennes boy? Joseph was adorable back in the day, although I think he's rather lost his looks these days. Enjoy this little one-two punch of Fiennes boys. Jason Bateman. I mean… come on! Jason Bateman is SO sexy. Look at his little mischievous grin, his boyish face. This mofo is 42 years old, and he doesn't look a day over 30. Clean living? Or do secretly naughty men never age? Sam Worthington. Sam is usually CB's kind of guy - I've always disliked him because he comes across as such a vapid meathead. But sometimes meatheads have their places, and maybe I'm just feeling guilty after lusting after guys who are inappropriately young for me, but I'm giving Sam another look these days. Sigh… still a meathead, but he has his charm. Tony Leung. You may know him from his work in films like Lust, Caution and 2046. He's one of the biggest stars in Asia, and one of the most demand actors in the world. Plus, you know, he's really sexy. He knows how to wear a suit, he knows how to look into the camera, and he knows how to not give everything away and yet still seem… nude. Robert Sheehan. A request, via Twitter. Robert was on Misfits, which I've never watched, and in some photos, he definitely gives off a young "Welcome Back, Kotter" vibe. But he has beautiful eyes, and I'd be willing to bet that whenever I sit down and watch Misfits, I will probably fall in love with him. Joseph Gordon Levitt. Another request! You bitches love some JGL. I think it's because he seems like a more old-fashioned, upstart movie star. JGL would be at home in the 1950s, I think, especially with that gorgeous profile. He would have worked with Gene Kelly and Audrey Hepburn, I think. Josh Holloway. Oh, Josh. I can't resist you. I don't even really care about blonde men… but you are the exception to the rule. I can't quit you. Those dimples… that smile. Those eye crinkles. The Holloway. Dean Winters (By CB) We’ve featured Dean before by request, but now that I’ve been watching Oz on HBO Go I really get his appeal. He’s a great actor, he does conniving very well and while he may have been hotter in his 30s he’s still got it now. Props to Winters for not getting hair plugs and for owning his hair loss. (I find that hot, really I do.) I still find those Allstate commercials annoying though. Mehcad Brooks (By CB) Mehcad played Eggs on True Blood and is now on USA’s Necessary Roughness. He used to be a Calvin Klein underwear model and he’s kept that amazing body. Plus his voice is so deep, sexy and soothing. Joel McHale (By CB) Joel comes in as a request to Kaiser on Twitter and she of course passed it to me because I love him. I miss seeing a new Community every week, but there’s still The Soup, where Joel has me laughing and swooning at the same time. Kit Harington (By CB) Kit plays Jon Snow on Game of Thrones and if you haven’t checked out this incredible series yet then take advantage of the summer lull in programming to savor it. Be forewarned though, it can be brutal at times and it’s filled with incredibly attractive men in period costume. Kit is a 24 year-old British newcomer and I just love his deep brown eyes and subtle performances. Matthew Lewis (By CB) This is another request, and this British actor is all of 22 now. Can you believe this is Neville freaking Longbottom from Harry Potter? Lewis is the hot guy at the reunion that you find yourself staring at. He has to come over and remind you that you turned him down for the prom. Just two years ago this kid was still awkward and now he’s a handsome devil along with being a movie star. Henry Cavill (by Bedhead) He was great in “The Tudors,” and now Cavill’s preparing himself to conquer Yank territory as well. Although some critics were quite vocal in their protest regarding this Brit taking on the Superman role in Zack Snyder’s upcoming Man of Steel reboot, let’s just give him a chance to prove his delicious self, shall we? Norman Reedus (by Bedhead) This guy once dated supermodel Helena Christensen, but Reedus is no pretty boy. While he’s still attempting to live down his role as the titular “Judas” from the Lady Gaga video, cult fans will always lovingly remember him as one of the MacManus brothers from The Boondock Saints movies. He’s got a cute smile too but, sadly, never shows it on the red carpet. Jamie Hince (by Bedhead) Although the world-at-large might recognize Mr. Hince only as Mr. Moss, I’ve had a bit of a thing for this scruffy guy for a few years already. While he’s not classically handsome in any sense, he’s got a very broken-in appeal and a style all his own, particularly when he’s singing onstage with his band, The Kills. If you don’t see the sexy, this music video might help a bit. Jeffrey Donovan (by Bedhead) While “Burn Notice” fans might disagree with this statement, I find Jeffrey Donovan most fetching in his sporty incarnation as an amateur tennis player. However, he’s also otherwise pretty good looking and not bad at the acting thing either, particularly in The Changeling. Timothy Olyphant (by Bedhead) This cowboy has the most sexually-charged killer swagger in existence. Over the past few years, Olyphant is finally getting his due thanks to a career-defining role as Deputy U.S. Marshal Raylan Givens in “Justified” (for which he just received an Emmy nomination). Previously, he was an under-the-radar favorite in HBO’s “Deadwood” series as well as countless movie roles. One of his most impressive moves, however, has been to use his entire body to kiss a woman into certifiable insanity (which is probably the only instance that I’ve ever envied Jennifer Garner). Hell, they don’t call him Olyphantastic for nothing. Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame, PRPhotos, Vanity Fair, GQ, Details, Esquire, Flaunt, W Magazine, Entertainment Weekly, Google Images. |
Kelly Brook’s hourglass figure in a bikini: gorgeous, aspirational or not your type? Posted: 15 Jul 2011 08:14 AM PDT Normally, we're not the kind of site to just run photos of chicks in bikinis just because it turns us on. We're mostly heterosexual women around here, although there are some women we would definitely consider. I tend to go for busty, brunette ladies with attitude, so that's why I want to like Kelly Brook. She's busty, brunette and… okay, she doesn't have that much attitude, from what I can see. She seems like a sweet girl, though, and these bikini photos of Kelly on holiday in Ischia, Italy are turning me on. How amazing is her figure? This is, like, a perfect hourglass figure. Toned but not gristly, soft not hard, amazing hips and dear God her breasts. They've gotten bigger! I know why too, but it's a sad story. In May, she suffered a miscarriage when she five months pregnant. Her boyfriend, Thom Evans, was the father, and as far as I know, they're still together. I mean… I can't imagine he would want to let this go. Ever. Anyway, ever since then, I've had sympathy for Kelly, and judging from these photos, I now know why all of those dudes have been all over her for so long. Her body is even more insane than before. She's up there with Christina Hendricks and Sofia Vergara for "Racks That I'd Love To Motorboat". I'll tell you something else, too: I would much rather have her figure than someone like Duchess Kate's. |
Jennifer Love Hewitt steps out in sweats and a t-shirt, tries hiding behind a little purse Posted: 15 Jul 2011 07:54 AM PDT
Photo credit: WENN.com |
From the Desk of Clive Owen (and Michael Fassbender too?) Posted: 15 Jul 2011 07:43 AM PDT FROM THE DESK OF CLIVE OWEN: Hello, darlings. So many letters lately, right? That should show you how much I miss you. I miss your eyes. I miss your smile. I miss you, missing me. After a brief journey to Ireland, where I made those drunken lasses swoon with the Musk d'CliveDong, I returned last night to London, where I attended a party for Armani. It was there that I ran into someone very, very interesting, and that is the reason for my letter. Yes, I met Michael Fassbender. Michael and I were in the same space, breathing the same air, our dongs only inches away from each other (and then later, pressed against each other). I have to say… he's my kind of man. He's manly and saucy and badass. If you have a crush on him, I approve. Just as long as you keep me as your Number One, I will not be upset if sometimes lust over The Fassbender. I thought of you lovely bitches when I saw him, and I knew what I had to do. I knew I had to create a homoerotic moment, just so I could explain it all in detail to you in this letter. I approached him slowly, letting the alcohol do most of my work. At that point in the evening, he looked like this: My goal was to get him to look like this: And it happened. Sure, I'll wait a moment while you catch your breath. Where was I? Oh, yes. I was getting Fassie liquored up. And then the time was right. I slide my hand against his waist and leaned in to whisper in his ear. He leaned in too, and my lips were quickly pressed against his neck. "We need to do this," I told him. "For the girls. They NEED us to do this." Michael pulled away and met my gaze. He surprised me with how forward he was… he took my hand and brought me to a dark corner of the party. Before I knew it, I had a handful of his ginger hair in my hands and our lips were locked together, our bodies intertwined, pushed against the wall. And just as quickly, we released each other. "For the girls," I repeated. "Yes, for the girls," Michael agreed, slipping me his hotel room key. Need a moment? I'll wait. |
Enquirer: Sara Gilbert and her partner broke up and are trying to split custody Posted: 15 Jul 2011 06:43 AM PDT
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, July 21, 2011] I did find a picture of Sara out with who I think must be Alison on 7/2/11. (In the photos with just the two of them.) It looks like she’s the same woman in the photo with their kids (that’s from March, 2010) and she’s wearing the same glasses and everything. So maybe their split came up suddenly, or maybe they’re still together. Those of you who watch “The Talk” might be able to let us know if Sara has talked about her home life much lately. If this is true hopefully they’ll be able to work it out so their kids can still spend time together. I don’t think they legally have any obligation to do that, and it’s got to be hard on the kids. |
Halle Berry trots out her hostage, Olivier Martinez, so they’re not done… yet Posted: 15 Jul 2011 06:32 AM PDT Well, I was wrong. My sixth sense failed me. Or did it? DUN-DUN-DUN. A few days ago, I got a spooky feeling that Halle Berry and Olivier Martinez were dunzo. They hadn't been pap'd together for nearly more than a month. Well, Olivier hadn't been seen at all for more than a month, and I thought he might have bolted, or he could have been shackled in Halle's dungeon (you never know). But Halle and Olivier stepped out yesterday, looking… er, not exactly happy. In some of these photos, I swear Olivier is being led, hostage-style, at gunpoint. So I'll admit that I wrong, but I'll also take credit for this perp-walk. Perhaps Halle figured it was time to do a photo op and her crazy ass demanded that Olivier walk with her in front of cameras. OR ELSE. What does this mean? Perhaps it's like Halle said to Gabriel Aubry, in a conversation he allegedly, secretly recorded - Halle views this relationship as "business". She and Olivier are "together" for as long as it takes to get their film Dark Tide out and promoted, and then they'll not-so-quietly split and suddenly we'll hear from Team Halle about how Olivier is a terrible, racist, abusive monster? All I know is that this doesn't really look like a couple in love. Oh, and Halle's hair is much too short. I don't like this new haircut. |
Victoria Beckham: Harper Seven is “the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen” Posted: 15 Jul 2011 06:07 AM PDT Victoria Beckham would like you to know that her daughter Harper Seven is much prettier than your daughter. Obviously. Victoria isn't going to say it like that, of course. She's merely going to declare, "Baby Harper is the most beautiful baby girl I have ever seen. I have fallen in love all over again! We all feel so blessed, and the boys love their baby sister so much” on Twitter. Of course mothers will always think their baby is the most beautiful, the most special, the brightest, etc. Posh is no different in that respect. But it certainly feels like there's a hint a judgment, right? [From Victoria's Twitter] Aw, I don't begrudge her, honestly. She finally got her girl and she must be beyond thrilled and excited. I bet David is "over the moon" as well. To their credit, David and Victoria seem like great, involved, loving parents and I'm sure Harper Seven is going to be one of the most spoiled princesses in all the land. Speaking of, we never talked about an interview Posh did before she gave birth, where she discussed her plans to dress her little girl up in all the frilly little things she can find:
[From People] Don't you really want Harper Seven to be a little tomboy now? I want her to be all about soccer, like her dad, and to eschew frills and pink and heels and makeup. I think Posh would accept that, of course, but I just think it would funny. |
John Mayer is trying to win Jennifer Aniston back, since she’s taken now Posted: 15 Jul 2011 06:05 AM PDT
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, July 25, 2011] I guess you can’t blame Mayer for trying, since Aniston took him back even after he blabbed to the paparazzi about how he broke up with her. It’s worth noting that Mayer gained some weight, not that there’s anything wrong with that since he’s an attractive guy either way before he opens his mouth. He’s not cutting his hair or shaving though and just looks like fresh hell lately. Meanwhile Aniston is frozen in time and remains very bangable, by most guys’ estimations. Like we may mock her for not switching it up much but she’s got a good formula going. Now she has a hot man by her side and can’t be bothered by Mayer. I hope she told him to f#ck off but you know that’s not her style. She probably just blinked a lot, called him back (since I doubt she texts) and engaged in small talk before she let him down easy, making some excuse that she was busy. I have to give Mayer some credit for laying low lately. He hasn’t tweeted or blogged in months (from my quick look-over) and is just going about his business. Maybe he’s matured behind the scenes. We’ll see when he inevitably comes back. I give him four months, but seriously props to him for going this long. Aniston and Theroux are shown on 7/7/11. Header image from 2/22/09. Credit: WENN.com. Mayer is shown on 7/13/11. Credit: Matt Smith, PacificCoastNews.com |
George Clooney never wants to let a woman get her hands on his ass(ets) Posted: 15 Jul 2011 06:00 AM PDT Yet another "Why George Clooney dumped Elisabetta" story! This one involves the words "tight" and "fist". Gross. So, we've already heard how Clooney dumped Elisabetta because she drove him nuts and they were leading separate lives anyway. Then we heard about how Clooney dumped Eli because he's totally NOT gay, and never fake dates, but he probably does make his girlfriends sign "golden gagging clauses" (I'm sure those clauses involve "tight" and… gross). And I think the last thing we heard was about Clooney dumping Eli because she's a famewhore who would do anything in front of a camera? We get it, Team Clooney. He dumped her. She deserved it. Enough! But it's not enough! Mike Walker over at The Enquirer claims that the real (super-REAL!) reason that Cloons dumped Cans was just because he's tight-fisted (gross?)… WITH MONEY. It seems Clooney is fine with "taking care" of a girl financially, but he's never going to let a woman get near his ass(ets).
[From The Enquirer, print edition] I think there a lot of men like this, especially when you're talking about a man who grew up with very little and made his money later in life. I mean, think about it: Clooney only started rolling in dough when he was well into his 30s. I don't blame him for wanting to protect his ass and his assets, but at the end of day, I can't help but think that his personal priorities are somewhat skewed. You can't take it with you, you know. Whoever dies with the most doesn't win. (I say, side-eyeing Clooney’s bankbook) |
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