Cele|bitchy

Nick Lachey & Vanessa Minnillo were secretly married today
Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony have “decided to end their marriage”
“Suddenly, everybody’s talking about hottie Matthew Lewis” links
Jennifer Lopez shoved Mary-Louise Parker out of the way to meet Duchess Kate
Chris Brown’s crotch- grabbing ‘Today’ gig got an audience of 18,000
Ed Westwick shows off his furry moobs: sexy or creepy?

Nick Lachey & Vanessa Minnillo were secretly married today

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 03:53 PM PDT

Do you hear that? That's the sound of Jessica Simpson guzzling a box of wine, followed by a bottle of Scotch, followed by ten vodka shots. In other words, "Friday". No! Poor Jessica. Today is the day that her ex-husband got remarried to the little tartlet that was only supposed to be his rebound girl, Vanessa Minnillo. That other sound you hear? That's the sound of Vanessa rolling on a bed of money from Nick's divorce settlement from Jessica. Vanessa got the last laugh!

Talk about a day in paradise. Vanessa Minnillo and Nick Lachey were married Friday evening in a tropical island ceremony in front of just 35 friends and family, their reps confirm exclusively to PEOPLE.

“For us, this is just a stepping stone to do what we ultimately want and that's to start a family together,” Minnillo tells PEOPLE.

The pair, who became engaged in November, flew their wedding guests to the secret location as a surprise.

“Nobody knew where they were going,” says Minnillo, 30.

Adds Lachey, “Our wedding invitations were in the form of a plane ticket. We told them they were going away and the attire was 'island chic.' It was all very vague.”

Minnillo, the new host of Wipeout, donned a two-piece Monique Lhuillier ensemble featuring an intricately embellished lace corset with rose and crystal detail, paired with a signature hand tufted skirt made of silk faille.

The look was completed with a tailored bow belt at her waist and chapel length tulle veil.

Lachey, 37, who hosts The Sing-Off, sported a Dolce & Gabanna suit.

Their wedding will be televised on a TLC’s special called Nick & Vanessa’s Dream Wedding premiering on July 30 from 9-11pm ET/PT.

[From People]

Okay, does anyone else think her dress sounds WAY too frou-frou? Two piece Lhuillier, lace corset (with crystal details) and a hand-tufted skirt? Too much. Especially for a beachy wedding. I mean, every bride should make her own choices, etc, and I'll definitely have to see photos of the gown for myself, but it sounds more like a prom dress for a 16-year-old than a wedding gown.

In any case, congratulations to the happy couple! They're been together for so long, I think they've probably worked out all of the kinks in their relationship, and I hope they will be very happy. Babies soon, I'm thinking.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony have “decided to end their marriage”

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 03:20 PM PDT

Holy Mother—! I did NOT see this one coming. Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony have announced, through a joint statement, that they are “ending their marriage”. This is not a touchy-feely announcement of “separation, but we’re trying to work something out.” This is flat-out “We’re getting a divorce, y’all.” You know what was the signal? Jennifer took her mother to last weekend’s BAFTA event, not Marc. Everybody was like “Oh, her mom probably wanted to meet Waity.” But no, that was the signal.

Jennifer Lopez and husband Marc Anthony have called it quits.

The couple just released a statement, claiming, “We have decided to end our marriage. This was a very difficult decision. We have come to an amicable conclusion on all matters.”

The story was first reported on People.com.

This will be Jennifer’s THIRD divorce — she was first married in 1997 to Ojani Noa, and again in 2001 to her backup dancer Cris Judd. This will be Marc’s second divorce.

The couple got married in 2004 in their Beverly Hills home. They have two children.

Marc and JLo renewed their vows just last year on their 6th anniversary — and back in May, they gave a steamy performance together on the season finale of “American Idol.”

[From TMZ]

Is this depressing to anyone else? I mean, yes, Jennifer is kind of crazy and she’s kind of a diva, but I thought Marc really loved her and that she adored him right back. You know what will be interesting? It will be interesting to hear if one of them was screwing around, first of all, and second of all, it will be interesting to see how the money stuff plays out. You know Marc has big tax problems, right? Oh, it’s going to get good.

Photos courtesy of WENN.

“Suddenly, everybody’s talking about hottie Matthew Lewis” links

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 11:33 AM PDT

Everybody's talking about Matthew Lewis & how he's become a hottie. [LaineyGossip]
More Fassbender photos!!! (Thanks, Allie!). Yeah, I think he and Zoe Kravitz are done. Look at him flirting with that chick. [Pop Sugar]
Review of Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part 2. [Pajiba]
Casey Anthony is getting death threats. [Dlisted]
Carla Bruni confirms her pregnancy. What's French for "Durr"? [Gawker]
Paz de la Huerta thinks women dislike her because she's always naked. [Jezebel]
Ke$ha is wasted. Water is wet, also. [Yeeeah]
Pippa Middleton gets pap'd again, this time in a really fug outfit. [Celebuzz]
Elin Nordgren has a new financier boyfriend. [PopEater]
Every time I see Mason-Dixon, I think he looks like his real father. [A Socialite Life]
Does anyone know who Diego Boneta is and why I should care? [OMG Blog]
More Kelly Brook photos - her tatas are covered, though! [Moe Jackson]
Rebecca Black might release new single. [The Blemish]
Miley Cyrus found the hawt derg truck, y'all. [Evil Beet]
Bristol Palin is talking about losing her V again. [LimeLife]
Oooh, CB will want to watch this: that 16-year-old bride-girl interviewed. [ICYDK]
Who got snubbed for an Emmy nomination? [PopBytes]

Jennifer Lopez shoved Mary-Louise Parker out of the way to meet Duchess Kate

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 10:59 AM PDT

As we already know, Jennifer Lopez is ALL ABOUT Prince William and Duchess Kate. She got the most face-camera time with Kate and Will when they were in LA, at the BAFTA event. Jennifer brought her mom, and J.Lo and Guadalupe definitely seemed to come to the event with a goal. After the event, Jennifer even tweeted that the Cambridges were "simply charming" - as if she were the Queen of Hollywood and she deigned to meet the prince and his duchess wife. I think the overwhelming majority of us were just kind of horrified with her dress, though. She chose a really inappropriate dress to meet Will and Kate.

Anyway, Mary-Louise Parker is not worried about alienating the self-appointed queen of Hollywood. MLP was asked by People Magazine how she enjoyed the BAFTA event, and whether she got to meet Will and Kate. MLP replied, "I didn’t meet them. I was shoved out of the way by Jennifer Lopez. Uh oh, I shouldn’t have said that.” OH NOES. Jennifer is going to cut a bitch over this! MLP better watch her ass, because I think Jennifer is standing nude in someone's basement, having chicken blood smeared on her so that a Santeria spell can be put on MLP. It's going to be terrible!

Here's a question: would you shove someone out of the way to meet Kate? I don't think I would. I would like to see her in person, sure. But I'm not one of those people who needs to shake someone's hand and have my photo taken with them, unless that person is someone like Michael Fassbender. I would shove my mother down a flight of a stairs to get to the Fassdong.

Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.

Chris Brown’s crotch- grabbing ‘Today’ gig got an audience of 18,000

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 10:23 AM PDT

Do you know how early I get up? Too early. And this morning, getting out of bed was really, really hard (I had been dreaming about Michael Fassbender, I think). So I did my morning routine, and settled in to watch the first 15 minutes of the Today Show. Wouldn't you know, that was a really crappy way to start my day. Chris Brown was going to perform later in the morning, and there were literally thousands of kids - mostly girls - waiting for him in and around Rockefeller Center. They were screaming and acting ridiculously excited to see him and it disgusted me so much, I just turned off the TV. These are some photos from Chris's performance this morning - first, he was dressed up as some kind of "nerd" I guess - bowtie, vest, etc. But then he took off more clothes as he performed, and he began grabbing his crotch a lot. Because… women like that? Gross.

According to Hollywood Life, some fans waited TWO DAYS for tickets or front-row action. More than 18,000 people showed up, and many of them had homemade signs that said crap like "My heart only belongs to you, Chris Brown." As far as I can see, he just performed and didn't have any kind of hissy fit or window-smashing freakout. So… good? If you'd like to see all of Chris's performances on Today, go here. Here's one song:

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

By the way, in this week's issue, Star Mag had a story about Chris Brown dropping homophobic slurs on his bros during a game of basketball. Chris said it never happened, and that he might sue:

Brown’s rep calls Star’s tale, printed in the July 25 issue, utterly false, saying that Brown wasn’t even playing basketball on the day the magazine claims.

“A totally fictitious article ran in the current Star magazine accusing our client Chris Brown of doing something that he did not do,” says Brown’s rep of the story appearing in the July 25 issue that was reported online Wednesday by the tab’s sister site, Radar Online.

“He got really ticked off when things didn’t go his way during the game, saying, ‘That’s gay!’ and 'You’re a f—–t a–!’ to the other players,” the magazine quotes an unnamed “eyewitness.” The article features a photo of Brown confronting another player.

So what’s Brown’s side of the story?

“He spent the entire day with dozens of members of the production team filming the video for ‘Body to Body’ at 1870 Sunset Paza in West Hollywood. The Star accompanied the fabricated story with a photo of Chris playing basketball in New York that was taken on the day of his F.A.M.E. CD release in March,” his rep adds.

“Chris Brown’s management is considering taking appropriate legal action against the paper. Unfortunately this bogus account is being picked up by additional media outlets. We stand behind our client and want to set the record straight that this did not happen.”

[From E! News]

They're going to sue Star for printing a story that everybody believes because of Chris Brown's long history of saying homophobic junk in public? Rii-ight.

By the way, is this one fug vest or what?

Photos courtesy of WENN.

Ed Westwick shows off his furry moobs: sexy or creepy?

Posted: 15 Jul 2011 09:39 AM PDT

These are photos of one of my favorite little furry creatures, Ed Westwick, on the set of Gossip Girl yesterday. I'm assuming that this is his costume, but you can never really tell with Ed. He's British and fabulous and this is totally the kind of ensemble he would come up with on his own. My guess is that the Gossip Girl costume department gave him this and he was the one to decide to keep that many buttons open. The man loves his moob-fur. And bless him, I like it too. Whenever I think about Ed Westwick and his moob fur, I swear, I think back to this cover: