Tuesday, May 17, 2011

The Superficial - Because You're Ugly

The Superficial - Because You're Ugly


The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 5.17.11

Posted: 17 May 2011 02:45 PM PDT

   
It’s The Crap We Missed, starting with the above photo of Laura Prepon at NBC’s Upfront event to showcase her new show that expects you to believe at some point Chelsea Handler looked even half this hot. I think it’s called We Think You’re Retards. Also, remember the other week when you couldn’t pry your Read More ...

Now That’s a Jew-Hatin’ Butt Crack

Posted: 17 May 2011 01:56 PM PDT

   
When I first saw these shots of a shirtless Mel Gibson outside his hotel in Cannes, I guarantee I had the exact same reaction you did: “This guy had to threaten arson to get a woman to blow him? It should be a crime not to perform oral sex on man this beautiful.” Except unlike Read More ...

Lady Gaga is The Messiah Now

Posted: 17 May 2011 01:07 PM PDT

   
Because all the cool kids are doing it in The Guardian, Lady Gaga made some controversial statements regarding religion in a recent interview with the UK paper where she’s made the inevitable leap from eccentric drug addict to thinking she’s Jesus: On her tour being a religious experience: “Yes, it is. It is a religious experience. But Read More ...

The Situation Sued His Dad

Posted: 17 May 2011 12:16 PM PDT

   
Last week, The Situation’s dad, Frank Sorrentino, released a series of YouTube videos that were supposed to be scathing tell-alls into the real life of his son, but were mostly hilariously-told anecdotes from a stereotypical car salesman who desperately wants you to think he’s in the mob. Regardless, steroid use shrinks your testicles, so naturally Read More ...

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Banging Blake Lively

Posted: 17 May 2011 11:00 AM PDT

   
UPDATE: Now with photos of them together this morning, so I can’t assume this is bullshit like 99% of the things I write about. Goddammit. At this point it’d just be easier to make a list of who Leonardo DiCaprio isn’t banging now that he’s seven days free of Bar Refaeli’s supermodel good looks, because Page Read More ...

Gwen Stefani’s Missing Something and Other News

Posted: 17 May 2011 10:30 AM PDT

   
Posted by Photo Boy - Even Jennifer Aniston’s dog couldn’t make a long-term commitment. - Brad Pitt finds the most polite way to say that working with Terrence Malick was an awful decision. - And speaking of awful decisions, Amy Winehouse is preparing for motherhood. - Johnny Depp wearing almost normal clothes Read More ...

Miley Cyrus Topless, Getting a Tattoo

Posted: 17 May 2011 10:01 AM PDT

   
Because one just-turned-18 Disney star tweeting a provocative photo of herself deserves another, here’s a topless Miley Cyrus getting a back tattoo in Venezuela that presumably will be just like her mom’s angel wings, only classier. I’m thinking airbrushed wings, except if you squint really hard it’s actually Yosemite Sam’s mustache with the words “Sexy Read More ...

Tom Sizemore’s Girlfriend Found

Posted: 17 May 2011 10:00 AM PDT

 
Meant to get to this yesterday, but more important things happened up to and including Gary Shirley dancing like this. Anyway, Tom Sizemore’s missing girlfriend was found in a Los Angeles meth-house over the weekend paving the way for his manager to make up all kinds of stories about barely even knowing the girl and Read More ...

Demi Lovato Wants You To Look at Her in a Bikini, LOOK AT HER!

Posted: 17 May 2011 08:24 AM PDT

   
This should end well. In an effort to prove just how far she’s come since checking into rehab to duck charges for punching a dancer who NARCed her out on tour, Demi Lovato tweeted a picture of herself in a bikini yesterday because she’s so confident with her body now. And what better way to Read More ...

When a Grope Becomes a Baby: The Maria Shriver Story

Posted: 17 May 2011 07:22 AM PDT

   
For those of you still losing sleep over how Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver’s marriage could’ve seemingly fell apart out of nowhere, turns out ten years ago he knocked up a woman who worked for them and then paid her to pretend the child was her husband’s as she continued to work for the family Read More ...

So These Katie Holmes Swimsuit Photos Are Happening

Posted: 17 May 2011 05:00 AM PDT

   
Making her swimwear debut on The Superficial, here’s a surprisingly feminine-looking Katie Holmes in Miami yesterday, and I say surprisingly because I just assumed Tom Cruise – oh, no, wait, he did turn her ass into a dude’s. Never mind. So, uh, how about Suri Cruise? Cute as a button, right? I love how she Read More ...

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