Friday, August 12, 2011

The Superficial - Because You're Ugly

The Superficial - Because You're Ugly

The Crap We Missed – Friday 8.12.11

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 01:45 PM PDT

   
Oh, look, they left her wax figure’s mouth wide open. — Go get the Shaq one. Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Han Solo with New Walking Nap Action, Angelina Jolie just moments before a successful child snatch, Johnny Depp’s lesser-known brother Dougie and the underrated Rachel Nichols for your Final Five. Yes, Jeremy Piven, Read More ...

Working For Paula Abdul is Rewarding

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 12:58 PM PDT

   
We’re into lists this week. Lists that show just how far celebrities are up their own asses that they’ve declared themselves Queen of Sphinctertown and demand a parade in their honor. So here’s Paula Abdul list of requirements for anyone who wants to be her assistant, and let me be the first to say, how Read More ...

Candice Swanepoel’s in a Bikini

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 12:08 PM PDT

   
“How was my day? Oh, the usual. Stood around staring into Victoria’s Secret models asses with a smirk on my face. Same old, same old.” I make a lot of jokes about stereotypes: Women are terrible drivers, black people love fried chicken, Republicans are all secretly homosexuals, Eskimos covet our gratuitous access to fleece, etc. But Read More ...

Lady GaGa Wore People Clothes

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 11:20 AM PDT

   
I’ve been trying to avoid Lady Gaga posts lately unless she does something really shocking. I’m talking wearing clothes that a sane, sober person would look at and go, “Wow, this doesn’t make me look like a lobster with a LEGO vagina. I’ll wear it in public,” which I just assumed would return her to Read More ...

This Alexander Skarsgard Thing is Getting Weird Now

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 10:51 AM PDT

   
So that’s who Corey Feldman was talking about… Here are new shots of Alexander Skarsgard filming in New York City this morning where I’d like to point out that yesterday I made a joke about him humping a traffic cone, and then this photo happened. More importantly, note the use of foreplay before entry making the Read More ...

Geri Halliwell Jumping on a Trampoline and Other News

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 10:50 AM PDT

   
Posted by Photo Boy - The Internet really wants Bert and Ernie to fuck each other. Just like me at age six. Random. - I guess Heaven really wasn’t too far away. (See what I did there? Because Jani Lane died? Sang that song? — I’M NOT YOUR MONKEY!) - Sean Penn gives speeches at Read More ...

Here’s Brooke Hogan Naked in a Cage

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 09:05 AM PDT

   
You may find this hard to believe, but apparently someone walked up to Brooke Hogan and said, “So, listen, I’ve got this old dog cage just lying around and want to take pictures of you naked in it for publicity,” and she said, “Sure!” From there it was a simple matter of finding the right Read More ...

Now Corey Feldman Says Hollywood Has a Pedophile Problem

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 08:19 AM PDT

   
Former child-star Corey Feldman has been a staunch defender of Michael Jackson despite making such comments as this when asked in a 2005 documentary if Michael ever showed him inappropriate images: “If you consider it inappropriate for a man to look at a book of naked pictures with a child that’s 13 or 14 years old, Read More ...

Gary Shirley’s 11-Hour Stripper Bender

Posted: 12 Aug 2011 07:35 AM PDT

   
Teen Mom Amber Portwood attempted suicide earlier this summer after she thought baby daddy Gary Shirley was going to curl up his butt-tail and stop smothering her to death with his sex. She’s since checked herself into rehab leaving Gary completely to his own devices and responsible for their young daughter, so naturally, he went Read More ...
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