The Superficial - Because You're Ugly |
- The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 8.2.11
- Matt Damon Defends Teachers Against Asshats With Admittedly Nice Boobs
- Chrissy Teigen is Everything That’s Right About The Internet
- Lindsay Lohan Was Concerned With Samantha Ronson’s Drinking, Those Words Just Happened
- Blake Lively & Leonardo DiCaprio Are Still Having Sex, Also Bike Riding
- Lady GaGa: ‘The World Killed Amy Winehouse’
- Heidi Klum in a Bikini and Other News
- Deena Cortese Gave Us a Parting Gift
- Jennifer Lopez Has a ‘Post-Split’ Interview In Vanity Fair Already
- Miley Cyrus Pickin’ That Dang Ol’ Butt in a Bikini
- Samantha Ronson Got a DUI
| The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 8.2.11 Posted: 02 Aug 2011 04:45 PM PDT    Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which has experienced a slight delay on account of Chrissy Teigen in her underwear and me frothing at the mouth over how in the year 2011 not educating kids is somehow a viable political position. I’m very professional. Long story short, Jasmine Waltz is in a bikini at Read More ... |
| Matt Damon Defends Teachers Against Asshats With Admittedly Nice Boobs Posted: 02 Aug 2011 03:45 PM PDT    Matt Damon knows what I’m talking about. Bourne Identity won’t even look down. Apparently Matt Damon did more than just hilariously spray himself in the face with suntan lotion at the Save Our Schools rally in Washington D.C. yesterday – Frankly, I would’ve dusted off my hands and proclaimed my work done. – he also agreed Read More ... |
| Chrissy Teigen is Everything That’s Right About The Internet Posted: 02 Aug 2011 02:08 PM PDT    As far as the site goes, I haven’t paid much attention to Sports Illustrated model Chrissy Tiegen which is a crime because she’s a hot chick who’s somehow so naturally funny I’ve contemplated wearing blackface and learning the piano. (That was a warning shot, John Legend, and yes, I realize you’re more of soft, beautiful Read More ... |
| Lindsay Lohan Was Concerned With Samantha Ronson’s Drinking, Those Words Just Happened Posted: 02 Aug 2011 01:23 PM PDT    Seen here smirking for her DUI mugshot as most celebrities do in California after a fun-filled hour of handling guns and working the sirens, Samantha Ronson reportedly has a drinking problem if you believe the sources in this story which you shouldn’t as I’ll explain later. TMZ reports: We’re told … in the past couple of Read More ... |
| Blake Lively & Leonardo DiCaprio Are Still Having Sex, Also Bike Riding Posted: 02 Aug 2011 12:18 PM PDT    Last month, a report surfaced that Leonardo DiCaprio had kicked Blake Lively to the curb which I was more than happy to post because famous actresses have shameful rebound sex with bloggers all the time. Have I not mentioned that? Probably because it’s so true and real. Anyway, turns out they’ve been spotted together several Read More ... |
| Lady GaGa: ‘The World Killed Amy Winehouse’ Posted: 02 Aug 2011 11:29 AM PDT    Because people who make claw hands’ opinions matter most, Lady GaGa was invited onto The View yesterday where, per junkie code, she proceeded to defend Amy Winehouse by saying there are absolutely no lessons to learn from her tragic, unpredictable death except, of course, for “the world” who basically murdered her. Via RadarOnline: The Born This Read More ... |
| Heidi Klum in a Bikini and Other News Posted: 02 Aug 2011 10:45 AM PDT    Posted by Photo Boy - Louis CK invited Dane Cook onto his show. This should be good. - The Kings of Leon are too tired to keep touring. No, really. - Ryan Reynolds brought Sandra Bullock to the premiere of The Change-Up. Does his penis have a swastika, too? - Apparently Kate Upton got Read More ... |
| Deena Cortese Gave Us a Parting Gift Posted: 02 Aug 2011 09:41 AM PDT    Sad news, everybody. The cast of Jersey Shore moved out of the beach house for the last time yesterday leaving a cannoli-shaped hole in our hearts that can only be filled with tanning oil and the clap. Fortunately, Deena Cortese saw fit to bless us one last time with the majestic brown canyon she calls Read More ... |
| Jennifer Lopez Has a ‘Post-Split’ Interview In Vanity Fair Already Posted: 02 Aug 2011 08:34 AM PDT    Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony announced their split just two weeks ago, and ever since it’s been a carefully, calculated PR battle on her end to paint herself as the victim of a “controlling” anorexic Latino who, at best, weighs 90 pounds soaking wet with delicious salsa. So, of course, Jennifer Lopez somehow already Read More ... |
| Miley Cyrus Pickin’ That Dang Ol’ Butt in a Bikini Posted: 02 Aug 2011 07:23 AM PDT    Here’s Miley Cyrus spending the weekend in Michigan with Liam Hemsworth where she demonstrated an almost supernatural ability to simultaneously smoke cigarettes and pick a berkini out of her butt. When reached for comment, her daddy responded, “Well, I reckon that’s just a regular ol’ hootenanny, long as there ain’t no book larnin’ or fancy Read More ... |
| Posted: 02 Aug 2011 06:04 AM PDT    “Officer, are ya gonna arrest me or bust my balls? My actual, physical balls. Which I have.” Lindsay Lohan’s former lover turned perpetual stalking victim Samantha Ronson was arrested for DUI yesterday after trying to drive home from Vegas completely shit-faced, proving lesbians really do think like dudes. TMZ reports: Law enforcement sources tell TMZ, Lindsay Lohan’s Read More ... |
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