Saturday, January 22, 2011

Best Week Ever

Best Week Ever

10 Major Changes Planned For The Spider-Man Musical

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 02:52 PM PST

After months of nonstop mishaps and stuntman injuries, the musical Spider-Man: Turn Off The Dark is promising “significant changes” before its official opening on March 15th. Here’s a list of 10 major changes they’re currently considering:

1. First Act closing number “Watch Me Juggle These Chainsaws, MJ” shortened

2. Crotch-lasers recalibrated

3. Orchestra Pit lions issued stern warning

4. Search for remaining stray mines under stage intensified

5. Shrapnel cannon aimed towards Aunt May’s nonvital organs

6. Flaming balcony seats covered with thick blanket

7. Stuntmen reassured they are immortal

8. Mercenaries sent after U2′s families called off

9. Ticket prices raised $10

10. Part where Spider-Man shoots Green Goblin in face cut


Follow @DanHopp on Twitter

Follow @BWEtv on Twitter.

Jerry Springer Cleans Up Dog Puke On Baggage, The Show Where That Happens

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 01:15 PM PST

Here’s former mayor of Cincinnati Jerry Springer cleaning up a Pekingese’s vomit on the VH1 show Baggage. Wait, it’s not a VH1 show? Hrm. That doesn’t sound right. Whatever you say, facts.

The dog’s owner is, in fact, Flavor Of Love alum Schatar “Hottie” Sapphira, whose BAGGAGE is that she spoon-feeds her dog in restaurants. If the dog then pukes in those restaurants and Jerry Springer isn’t around to wipe it up, then that is some serious BAGGAGE:

I mean, there’s “Career Rock Bottom” moments and then there’s “Career Rock Bottom” moments…

(via VH1 Blog)

Cat Falls Asleep Inside Bike Helmet, Hearts

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 12:43 PM PST

Dammit, adorable cats — I really try not to post pictures of you on this blog and pretend it’s content, but you make it very difficult when you FALL ASLEEP INSIDE BIKE HELMETS:

Aggghdghghgdhghdgdhk!!! Now there’s a helmet that offers some serious paw-tection. NO! No, I won’t get sucked in.

I’m like Hollywood every year around Christmastime, where I tell myself “This year, I am NOT gonna make a trailer where people get hit in the nuts to the beat of that Nutcracker song……agggh!!! I can’t not make another one! It’s too funny!”

I’m like that, or, like, a heroin addict. Pick your analogy. I’m thinking kind of both. But cute heroin.

The Top 10 Sexiest Pics Of Rihanna’s New Hairdo Not On Rihanna

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 01:33 PM PST

Remember when we scored never-before-seen pics of Chris Brown crying at the World Cup? Well, again, you guys totally aren’t going to believe this! We have another MAJOR EXCLOOOSIVE! This time it’s a massive collection of photos of celebrities wearing Rihanna’s new hairdo/wig, dubbed “The Sideshow Bob” by Michelle. Like I said, unbelievable! We’ve compiled the top 10 sexiest of these pictures for your viewing pleasure. [Photo: Splash News Online]

10. Randy Jackson on the “American Idol” season 10 premiere

9. The Cast Of MTV’s “Skins”

8. A shirtless Situation

7. Anne Hathaway As Catwoman

6. A Shirtless Regis Philbin, Flexing His Muscle

5. The Biebs, Boogie-Boarding

4. The First Lady With Chinese President Hu Jintao

3. Miranda Kerr And Her New Baby Flynn

2. Mila Kunis Filming Black Swan With Natalie Portman

1. That Cow We All Want To Have Sex With

Dust Off Your 90s Jokes: Bill Clinton Dines With Cameron Diaz

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 10:53 AM PST

The Committee To Create Softballed 90s Leno Jokes (the CCS9LJ) sponsored a dinner last night finally bringing together Bill Clinton and Cameron Diaz, with highly captionable results:

Let’s channel our inner 90s monologuists and try to come up with some dated jokes for the easy punchline this story could have been 12 years ago:

- President Clinton had dinner with Cameron Diaz last night [Audience OOOHs] Yeah, yeah this is true. Afterwards, Clinton was heard telling her “By the way, I know an excellent dry cleaner…”

- I don’t know if you heard, but Bill Clinton and Cameron Diaz had dinner last night. When he first heard about it, Slobodan Milosevic said “What? And I can’t even have lunch with Kato Kaelin and Elian Gonzalez!”

- President Clinton f***ed Cameron Diaz last night. We have a great show for you tonight…

That’s all I got.

(pic via Splash)

WANT: This Bangladeshi Doroit Pistons Knockoff Shirt

Posted: 21 Jan 2011 10:03 AM PST

Internet, I’ve given you much and asked for nothing in return (both halves untrue) but please, somehow, some way, can you get me one of these Bangladeshi Knockoff Detroit Pistons Winnie The Pooh Shirts?

I sent the pic to my friend Steve, who correctly replied “That plus the weirdo Sonic backpack is my perfect outfit. No pants or shoes or anything either.”

I’d say maybe a ‘Black Bart Simpson’ t-shirt under it, but otherwise, total agreement. And seriously, get me one of these. Is the dude in that pic reading this? Hit me up on Twitter. Not with a message, I mean literally Tweet that shirt to me. Use ShirtFrog. Thanks in advance!
Brought to you by: at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)