Cele|bitchy |
- Jesse James and Kat Von D are planning a summer wedding
- Rumer Willis’s unfortunate ensemble: meh or tragic?
- Emma Roberts gets bitchy about nepotism, which is “obviously not true”
- Leonardo DiCaprio “lavishes” Blake Lively with $70,000 worth of “gifts”
- Angelina Jolie, “Goodness Angel of the World”, makes UNHCR trip to Turkey
- Are Mary-Kate Olsen and Kanye West hooking up?
- Gerard Butler looks exceedingly sexy & tabloids still have him with Jessica Biel
- Kirstie Alley thinks she has a 22-inch waist, just like Megan Fox
- Christina Aguilera is annoying the other judges on The Voice by acting the diva
- Did Adele cancel her tour because someone told her to lose weight?
| Jesse James and Kat Von D are planning a summer wedding Posted: 17 Jun 2011 08:24 AM PDT Yesterday, in the late afternoon, Life & Style had a great headline - "Jesse James and Kat Von D's wedding is on hold". Their story was based on an unnamed source, plus some random tweets, and built into a story about how Jesse and Kat had put their relationship on "pause". I thought it was a decent story, mainly because I think the overwhelming majority of people think JJ and Kat aren't going to make it, long-term. But still, the denials came, and now Jesse has announced to People Mag that they plan to marry this summer, on the one-year anniversary of when they began dating. Rii-ight.
[From People] Ordinarily, I'm not one of those people desperate for someone else's comeuppance. I think karma usually takes time, and I'm patient. I'm much happier throwing a "we'll see, won't we?" glare, like a bitchy Cassandra, rather than actively wishing for something bad to happen to some d-bag immediately. But I actively want something horrible to happen to Jesse. NOW. Just reading "I am absolutely more in love today than I was a year ago. She’s the one for me" made me say to myself "I hope she cheats on him with twenty different guys, and I hope he becomes impotent for the rest of his life." Like, I want that to happen right now, if possible. He deserves it. Photos courtesy of Fame.      |
| Rumer Willis’s unfortunate ensemble: meh or tragic? Posted: 17 Jun 2011 07:54 AM PDT These are photos of Rumer Willis out clubbing two nights ago in LA. I think she was on her way out of or in to Teddy's, a frequent hotspot for the young and the cracked-out. There are several things that disappoint me about these photos, but I should start out by saying that at least this wasn't a formal red carpet. This is not how Rumer presents herself as a professional, or how she presents herself when she knows she's going to be photographed. No, this is how she dresses when she hanging out with friends, getting wasted, being young, etc. I have no problem with her partying - from what I can see, she's not a club-rat, and she does seem to have a close circle of genuine friends rather than enablers. She's not Linnocent in that respect. But this is how she dresses for a fun night. Booty shorts, a Van Halen shirt and… some kind of slouchy, Ugg-style boots? And her HAIR. She's had those ugly-ass extensions in for too long, and they look so gross! The Rihanna-esque hair color isn't helping either. I know she's young and now is the time for her to experiment with hair colors and styles and clothes… but it just feels like Rumer is absolutely clueless about what works on her. Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.    |
| Emma Roberts gets bitchy about nepotism, which is “obviously not true” Posted: 17 Jun 2011 07:51 AM PDT This week, Kaiser gave us a fresh reminder of just how nasty, rude, and obnoxious Julia Roberts can really be, and it seems that her niece (and daughter of Eric Roberts) is well on the path to claiming that portion of the family legacy. Generally speaking, we already know that Emma is both entitled and smug and 20 going on 12, but now she takes issue with people (primarily those nefarious bloggers) who dare to insinuate that her family name has helped her get movie roles. You see, this notion is simply “so ridiculous” and “obviously not true” even though Emma seems to have forgotten that her role in Valentine’s Day most definitely came as a result of Aunt Julia’s involvement. Outside of that bit role in a box-office slam dunk, Emma’s effort to prove some cred of her own has faltered miserably. Sure, she’s a serviceble enough little puppet in roles like Nancy Drew and Hotel for Dogs, but she doesn’t really shine and comes off as very easily replaceable onscreen. Last year, It’s Kind of a Funny Story failed to recoup its budget even though Emma walked around in her bra and panties throughout the movie. (Don’t forget that she still insists that actresses who go topless are “tasteless”. Emma’s also got a movie coming out this weekend, The Art of Getting By (she plays a popular high school girl that decides to date a misfit), which is currently sitting at 21% on Rotten Tomatoes. Still, let’s not even mention the possibility that Aunt Julia has anything at all to do with Emma Roberts getting either of these roles as a romantic leading lady because she spoke to Popeater and proved us all wrong:
[From Popeater] Okay, Emma’s clearly on the defensive (and in denial) here about the fact that a famous name might not get you everywhere in Hollywood (see Angus Sutherland), but it will get your foot in the door. This is particularly the case when talent is not a huge factor, which is the case where Emma is concerned. Seriously, in a Hollywood where even Rumer Willis can get consistent work, nobody can claim that nepotism doesn’t exist. Rumer isn’t an awful actress, but she isn’t any good either, but standards are really low for those with a family name. One really has to be a bad as poor Angus to lose that initial golden foothold. Of course, I generally feel a slight pang of guilt for giving Emma some crap here because it’s not like she’s headed the way of the Crackhead Lohan in her early twenties. Still, the girl needs to appreciate where she came from and learn a little humility. Hopefully, that’ll come with age. Incidentally, Emma also claims in the Popeater interview to wear heels “24/7,” but I guess that doesn’t include the below photograph, which was taken less than a month ago. Don’t judge! Photos courtesy of WENN       |
| Leonardo DiCaprio “lavishes” Blake Lively with $70,000 worth of “gifts” Posted: 17 Jun 2011 07:22 AM PDT This story is one of the funniest things I've read all week. I got the giggles just transcribing it. It comes from In Touch Weekly, so you know the BS is lacquered on, but dear God, I hope it's true. According to their source (Blake Lively's publicist), Blake Lively "has it all" - she has a thriving, glamorous career, she's absolute perfection, and she landed the hottest guy. Once again, this is all according to a "source". To make matters even more fabulous for Blake, her boyfriend buys her "gifts". Because nothing says "true love" when your notorious-womanizer boyfriend treats you like a "professional". It’s like Leo doesn’t know how to just BE in a relationship with a woman he doesn’t have to buy “gifts” for.
[From In Touch Weekly, print edition] I mock because I'm jealous. I would love $70,000 worth of gifts from Leonardo, but unfortunately I don't do the kind of stuff Blake does, so I'll probably never get a "Thanks for that thing you did with your tongue in that place" ostrich satchel. I will never get a "I really appreciated that position you let me try, I'm sorry you busted something" brooch. As I’ve said before, I admire Blake’s hustle, and I think it speaks volumes about her and what she’s got going on (beyond the sex stuff) that Leo isn’t behaving as though she’s a one-night-stand. He actually seems besotted, and I’m sure he’s buying her “gifts” because he actually likes her, and this relationship seems to be working for the time being. How long will it work? Eh. I’d give it another three to six months. It does make me wonder - does Leo even know how to be in a relationship where he's not "showering" his lady with "gifts"? No, I won't go there. I wonder which “other gifts” Leo gave her later…? Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Angelina Jolie, “Goodness Angel of the World”, makes UNHCR trip to Turkey Posted: 17 Jun 2011 07:13 AM PDT Angelina Jolie is in Turkey today on UNHCR business. She's on the Turkey-Syria border, where she's meeting with some of the thousands of Syrian refugees now living in refugee camps within Turkey. The refugee exodus from Syria has increased over the past months as the Syrian government cracks down on anti-government protests. According to the AP, Jolie is due at a camp in the Turkish province of Hatay, and Turkish authorities were hanging a banner to welcome her. The banner reads - no joke, I swear - “Goodness Angel of the World, Welcome.” Seriously. Here's more:
[From CNN] Angelina likely scheduled this trip to draw extra attention because of World Refugee Day, which is Monday. I'm still hoping she gives a major interview for the occasion, and I saw on CNN this morning that they have a reporter on the trip too, so maybe CNN will get the interview. Here are some raw videos (from Turkish television) of Jolie's arrival in-country: Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
| Are Mary-Kate Olsen and Kanye West hooking up? Posted: 17 Jun 2011 06:57 AM PDT
Anyway The Enquirer has a story this week claiming that “friends” are telling Mary-Kate to “stay away” from player Kanye West. They don’t outright say that Kanye and Mary-Kate are together, just that it looks suspicious since Mary-Kate was hanging all over Kanye at his birthday party. He would be bad news for her, obviously, since he’s bad news for just about any woman who would deign to go near his diamond teeth. Can you imagine what gets caught in those things? Those are his real teeth and are not a grill.
[From The National Enquirer, print edition, June 27, 2011] I can’t believe the Olsen Twins are just 25 years old. Their Boca style ages them considerably. So this is ultimately a non-story, even by the Enquirer’s standards. Mary-Kate was up close and dancing with Kanye, but that doesn’t mean he’s cheating on his Victoria Secret Model girlfriend, Chanel Iman, or that Mary-Kate is even interested. It’s just all about Mary-Kate potentially partying too much again after her 2004 rehab stint. I would like to see her dating again, and someone who is her speed. Who should she hook up with? Josh Harnett is still single. This is MK at the Costume institute gala in May. Isn’t she lovely? Photo credit: WENN.com    |
| Gerard Butler looks exceedingly sexy & tabloids still have him with Jessica Biel Posted: 17 Jun 2011 06:40 AM PDT These are some new photos of Gerard Butler, looking good enough to eat. I get it, though - I mean, I understand why so many of you aren't in to it. He's a man-slut and he's rather unapologetic about not seeing the need for meaningful relationships. I understand why you think he's gross. Just know that I'm very happy with how gross he is. And he's been so much grosser in the past. Nowadays, he's keeping the weight off, growing out his hair, wearing better clothes and generally bringing the hot Scottish dong fantasies. Sigh… I love him. I would have hit it (hard) when he was mooby, but now that he's all slim and hot… oooh… I just need to stop. Anyway, this week's tabloids are currently on his fauxmance with Jessica Biel. It's like that Ashley Greene thing never happened - which is his pattern. He gets to rub the ass and crook his little finger at various "extra" ladies while his main fauxmance rages on in the tabloid world. This is exactly how he played it with Jennifer Aniston too. It's his thing. Sidnenote: E! News got a quote from him about his love life a few nights ago. He was asked how his love life was going, and he growled, “It’s terrible.” SWOON. So here are the highlights from two Biel-Butler stories: The Enquirer says that Jessica Biel is keeping it casual, but that she liked Gerard because he's a "bad boy" who doesn't care about his appearance, he just "seems to roll out of bed and seize the day…he's a bit coarse and rumpled around the edges, and that's like a breath of fresh air to Jessica after Justin." What was supposed to be simply an on-set fling turned into something more and Biel "surprised her friends when she continues the flirty relationship with Gerard after the movie wrapped." Biel knows Gerard is a player but she likes him because "he put a smile on her face again… he treats Jessica like she is the only woman in the world when they're together - and that's enough for her right now." Star Magazine claims that Jessica is just romancing Gerard to get back at Justin Timberlake. Apparently, Jessica and JT were at a friend's baby shower and "they spent a lot of time talking - it was obvious that they still have feelings for each other, especially Jessica." Days later, Jessica was spotted on a motorcycle ride with Gerard because "Jessica would never get into a real relationship with a playboy like Gerard. But I think she figured that seeing her with a guy like him would make Justin jealous." The Gerard stuff has made JT have a change of heart: "He's suddenly telling friends that he could see them getting back together… but Jessica is giving Justin time to figure things out." Yeah… uh, it sounds like Biel got Butler'd. He slept with her and moved on. As is his pattern. And now Jessica is trying to play it like he’s pursuing her and she just wants to have fun. Photos courtesy of Fame.    |
| Kirstie Alley thinks she has a 22-inch waist, just like Megan Fox Posted: 17 Jun 2011 06:36 AM PDT At some point, I just gave up on trying to understand, interpret or excuse Kirstie Alley's delusions. Bitch is crazy: I give up. Let go and let Xenu. Previously, KA has claimed that she went from a 12, to an 8, and now to a "stretchy size" 4 or 6, post-DWTS. She also claimed she lost 38 inches - just by going down from a 12 to a 6. So this latest interview with Kristie barely got a "Seriously, you need to be institutionalized" raised brow from me. Kristie sat down with Life & Style, and with a complete straight face, claimed that she has the same waist size as Megan Fox - 22 inches.
[From Life & Style] I'm really starting to worry… about Kristie's poor assistants and stylists who have to run around, jury-rigging tape measures and sewing three pairs of Spanx together and doing weird stuff with magnets for Kristie's scales. It must be exhausting. I guess I should give Kirstie some credit - at least she didn't actually say she was the same size as Megan Fox. Life & Style just interpreted it that way. These are all photos of Kirstie from the past week. Just to give you an idea of her 22-inch waist. And yes, she’s gaining weight. Now she probably has a twenty-THREE inch waist. Photos courtesy of WENN & Fame.    |
| Christina Aguilera is annoying the other judges on The Voice by acting the diva Posted: 17 Jun 2011 06:35 AM PDT
[From The NY Post] As many of you mentioned in our last story on XTina’s Voice gig, she’s revealing what a petty person she is with every episode basically. I’ve only seen a few episodes of The Voice, and she’s come across as superficial and self centered, and she often picks fights with Adam. She isn’t terrible, though, probably because no one is calling her on her sh*t. She’s thinks the star, but right now she’s just a (very talented) singer whose last CD tanked, whose tour got canceled, and who is hanging on to her new gig on a competition reality show by the skin of her teeth. Do you think she’s going to get hired for more jobs, or even hold on to this one, if that’s the way she treats her coworkers? Christina is shown on 6/3/11. Credit: Fame and Pacific Coast News    |
| Did Adele cancel her tour because someone told her to lose weight? Posted: 17 Jun 2011 06:16 AM PDT I have no idea why this week seems like The Week of Weight Issues And The People Who Take Issue With Weight. There was Gwyneth Paltrow, being rude to her chubby peasant "friend," then there was Julia Roberts allegedly being a nasty, vile bitch to her overweight half-sister. And now we have a story about a non-celebrity being a nasty piece of work to an overweight celebrity. That celebrity is my dear love, Adele. I want to be Adele's girlfriend (interpret that however you want), I want her to sing to me as I go to sleep, and most of all, I want Adele to find some kind of happiness and contentment. Because I worry about her - Adele's a good girl, but she's neurotic and hyper-self-aware, and little things can send her into a tailspin (God, that sounds familiar). Anyway, Star reports this week that Adele didn't really cancel her North American tour because of laryngitis, which was the excuse given a few weeks ago. Star claims that Adele really canceled her tour because some American music executive d-bag told her she should lose weight. SHUT YOUR DOUCHE MOUTH!
[From Star Magazine, print edition] Adele is not Katy Perry. Adele is not Rihanna. Adele is not Britney. Adele is not Cheryl Cole. Adele is not Ke$ha. Adele is not Madonna. Adele is not Miley Cyrus. Adele is not Nicole Scherzinger. Adele is not even Beyonce. With Adele, there is literally NO need to try to package her or "fix" her or market her as some kind of sexed-up doll/pop product. She has a magnificent voice, and she's a gifted songwriter who writes for herself. You can just hand out her CDs and people will just understand it. People will go, "Oh, REAL music. So pretty!" A few weeks ago, CB and I were talking about Adele, and I compared her to the epically talented female singer-songwriters of the 1960s and 1970s, like Carole King and Carly Simon. I stand by that - when you have that much talent, it really doesn't matter what you look like. The "product" you're selling is actually the music, not the artist. But besides all of that, I think Adele is really beautiful. She looks like she loves food and wine, and I bet she's a great date. I wish I could date her. But I'll settle for Prince Harry dating her. Should I put it up again? Adele singing "Someone Like You" at the BRIT Awards a few months ago: Photos courtesy of WENN.    |
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