Monday, September 20, 2010

Best Week Ever

Best Week Ever

Mariah Carey Releases Sequel To 1994 Christmas Album

Posted: 20 Sep 2010 08:22 AM PDT

Move over, Meat Loaf and also the person who came up with the title for 5nal Destination, cause Mariah Carey is releasing a sequel to her 1994 Merry Christmas album entitled Merry Christmas II You, hitting Best Buy front-of-store racks and homes of parents who still purchase compact discs this November:

FINALLY! So many loose ends left unanswered on that first album. Who is coming to town? Is there a lot of noise in the night? Was that really all she wants for Christmas? Was Santa Keyser Soze for some reason? Did the Christmas top drop?

Surely, closure was Mariah’s main motivation for randomly releasing this album, in addition to this.

Unrelatedly, I just noticed that “Silent Night” was composed by someone named Franz Gruber, which is way too close to Die Hard villainy for my tastes. I no longer trust that song.

(via Idolator)

Awesome Photoshop, Some Guy!

Posted: 20 Sep 2010 08:52 AM PDT

Ohhhhh, good morning, little ones!!  Gross.  What was that?  “Little ones?”  Too bad there’s literally no way to delete things on these modern typewriter-TVs.

So here’s what’s going on.  Ian McKellen attended a protest in London’s Hyde Park where people gathered to demonstrate against the Pope.  The Pope.  Not Beau Pope.  Beau Pope is just a guy I went to high school with.  And at this protest, Ian McKellen… by the way I’m talking about the Ian McKellen, not Ian Sobel who is just a guy I went to college with who some people thought looked like Dave Horwitz, but I never agreed.  I am, of course talking about the Dave Horwitz I also went to college with and not the David Horowitz who is a conservative writer and policy advocate.

Yeah, so Ian McKellen was at this protest wearing a tee shirt that said, “Some people are gay.  Get over it,” which is an entirely good and reasonable sentiment to tell a Pope on your tee shirt, no sarco (“no sarco” is a thing I made up just now that is “no homo” for sarcasm).  Then what happened was somebody took a picture of Ian McKellen wearing that shirt and made a really great photoshop joke.  And here it is.  This morning’s best photoshop joke:

Thanks, The Daily What.  Reposting your blog posts is the new blogging.

Russell Brand Probably Had Sex With This Owl

Posted: 20 Sep 2010 07:55 AM PDT

Here’s Russell Brand at the Legend Of The Guardians premiere, posing (and possibly doing lines with) this owl (unconfirmed):

The most shocking part about this photo, at least to me, is the fact that a Legends Of The Guardians: The Owls Of Ga’Hoole premiere party means that it’s more likely that Legends Of The Guardians: The Owls Of Ga’Hoole is a real movie. I’ve been seeing the ads for months now, and the proposed owl film doesn’t look bad per se, but I just cannot bring myself to believe it is an actual movie that humans have made and are now promoting it for other humans.

The trailer actually includes the line “One owl…will save us all.” Not a real movie, right? When a trailer says that, it’s a fake trailer for a fake movie. I am basing that on my knowledge. Have fun getting punk’d next week, people going to see Legends Of The Guardians: The Owls Of Ga’Hoole! I’ll be staying home watching the only TRUE owl movie: That One Part In My Cousin Vinny.
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