Monday, September 27, 2010

Best Week Ever

Best Week Ever

Sesame Street Covers Katy Perry’s Cleavage With Cami-Secret

Posted: 27 Sep 2010 07:45 AM PDT

Problem solved! Sesame Street doesn’t have to scrap their racy footage of Katy Perry and her controversial cleavage after all – they can just digitally insert a Cami-Secret cleavage coverer into the video and viola! No more aroused children.

Everyone can enjoy this, right?

(Thanks for preventing these childhood sexual awakenings Pete “Fastbieber” Schultz)

I Ruin Your Morning After Dentist

Posted: 27 Sep 2010 01:37 AM PDT

It’s morning time.  Guh-ross.  Am I right, ladies????  And the fellas know what I’m talkin’ about.  We got any married people in the house?  Let me hear ya!  Pssssssht, they can’t even yell.  Married people can’t get up the energy to yell out in the morning.  They up all late last night fightin’ with each other.  Screamin’ ’bout who gonna lick up all the baby powder.

So, that was me if I did stand up comedy in the morning and also thought that married people fight about who has to lick up baby powder.  Did you like it?  No.  You did not.  You know what else you won’t like?  This goddamn viral video.  Oof.  It is going to offend you, and it’s going to ruin your morning.  It’s a rip off of David After Dentist, but it’s two kids, and they’re older, and they’re not that entertaining, and they’re clearly playing it up, and the video is ten minutes long.  Too many minutes, internet!  But it’s going viral, so I want to show it to you so we can all get mad about the internet letting things get viral that shouldn’t get viral.  This is O-Town to the Backstreet Boys that was David After Dentist.  Why do we allow these things to happen?

There’s no way you watched that whole thing, right?  To be honest with you guys… I mean, a little bit I posted this video because I want us all to get upset about how this is a rip off of a viral video, and then furthermore get upset that anyone would ever take the time and effort to rip off a viral video.  But, if you want to get real — like for real real — I am writing this post at 3:27 AM because somehow I got myself sucked into watching Veronica f*cking Mars on Netflix. I’ve been watching it for 6 hours now, and it’s too late for me to be able to wake up in the morning to write a morning blog post.  This was the best thing I could find on the internet at 3:27 on a Monday morning.  So, I’m writing this now to be posted at 8:55 while I sleep well into the ten o’clocks.  Maybe into the elevens if I watch another episode.

Thanks A LOT, Buzzfeed.

P.S. Veronica Mars, as it turns out, is a very good show and you have to right to judge me unless you have seen it.  And, no, it is not for 14 year old girls.  It is for 26 year old boys.

UPDATE: Watched another episode.  See you at 11 something.
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